Page 4 of Clear Shot (Lauderdale Knights #9)

Aiden

It’s usually customary to pick up a gift or something when you’re about to propose marriage, but this isn’t a typical proposal. I don’t even know if a proposal is going to happen.

I don’t know what came over me when I heard Jordan say he would marry Hana but there was zero chance of that happening. I have no right or reason to be jealous but that’s the only way to explain the fiery burst of emotions when I thought about her marrying Jordan.

He’s a good guy, my friend and teammate, and I know he wouldn’t hurt her. This would be a business arrangement, after all, not a love match.

But still.

They would have to live together.

Spend time together.

Spend nights together.

And even though I don’t think Hana necessarily wants to sleep with him, things happen when two attractive people are together twenty-four-seven. When you live and eat and sleep in the same house.

So I opened my big mouth, and now I’m standing at Johan’s front door, about to ask Hana to marry me.

What kind of crazy cluster fuck have I just gotten myself into?

Technically, I could still walk away, say I’ve changed my mind, but I’m not going to.

“Hey, Aiden.” Sloane opens the door with a smile. “Come on in. We’re sitting out back. Are you hungry?”

I shake my head. “I already ate but thank you.”

I follow her through the house and out to the back patio.

Hana looks up as soon as I get outside and it’s impossible to gauge what emotions are lurking behind her pretty blue eyes.

She’s nervous.

Unsure.

Maybe a little scared.

And I don’t know how to fix that.

“I think maybe you two should talk alone,” Johan says after saying hello. “Sloane and I are going to clean up the dishes.”

He and Sloane gather up everything and disappear inside the house, so I sink down next to Hana.

“Hey.”

“Hi.”

“I’m sorry if?—”

“I’m not sure—” We both start to talk at the same time, and I smile.

“Ladies first.”

“I’m not sure what made you offer to marry me,” she says, “but I want you to know I appreciate it. Even if we decide not to do it.”

“Do you have any other options?”

“Not if I want to stay in the US.”

“Well, I took the liberty of talking to the team this afternoon, saying I’m thinking of marrying my girlfriend and that she would need a visa right away.”

“And?”

“They said to just let them know.”

“Oh. That’s almost too easy.”

“It’s different with the team. There are guys from all over the world and they want to bring their wives and girlfriends so they already have the process in place. If you decide you want to do this?—”

“If we decide,” she interjects.

I nod. “Right. If we decide, we can go down to the courthouse tomorrow—there’s no waiting period in Florida—and the team will make it happen. There’s a small chance you might have to go back to Slovakia for a week or two, but probably not.”

“Oh.” I can’t tell what she’s thinking so I decide to go with honesty and full disclosure.

“What are you thinking?” I ask after a moment.

“It’s more like, what are you thinking?” she counters, searching my face. “I mean, why would you do this for me?”

“You’re my friend, and I know why you don’t want to go back to Slovakia.” We’ve talked about it a lot.

“It would complicate our relationship.”

“I know, but what fun is life without a few complications between friends?”

She smiles. “I suppose there’s that.”

“Look, we can give it a try. A year. If you haven’t found a job that will sponsor you by then, we’ll reassess. Otherwise, we can just go with the flow.”

“Yes, but…” She chews the inside of her cheek. “We can’t tell people we got married for a visa. The government frowns on that, even if it’s done through the team. So we’d have to let the team and almost everyone else think it’s real.”

“I guess we will.” I hadn’t thought about that.

“And we need a prenup—I don’t want anything from you when we divorce.”

“I know that. I’ve already put in a call to my lawyer.”

“You’ve put a lot of thought into this,” she whispers. “Why?”

Now I have to decide just how much honesty is enough. Or necessary.

Do I tell her it’s because I can’t stand the thought of her being married to one of my teammates? Or that I’ve had a hard-on for her since we met?

“I care about you,” I say carefully. “I know you don’t want to leave and, if I’m honest, it’s not a huge hardship. Hockey keeps me busy. You have friends and your brother, and you’ll be job-hunting. If we don’t want to, we wouldn’t have to spend a lot of time together.”

“But that’s just it—we will have to. I’ll have to go to games and wear your jersey. We have to hold hands and act like a couple whenever we’re around the team.”

“Is that… a problem?”

“No. It’s actually the opposite.”

Okay, so we’re on the same page even though we’re dancing around the issue.

“So, yeah.” I clear my throat. “That’s the other thing. I don’t want to be a dick, and I definitely don’t want you to feel like you owe me anything, but if we’re going to be together, then we have to be… together .”

“You’re talking about sex.”

“Yes, but more than that, I’m talking about cheating. I don’t want to do that. I don’t want the guys to see me slip away with some puck bunny on a road trip. But at the same time, I can’t go a year without sex. That’s just not, well, I can’t .”

“Same,” she whispers.

“That doesn’t mean that we get married tomorrow and immediately consummate the marriage. We can take our time, see how we feel about taking that step. I don’t want you to feel pressured into having sex with me. That’s not what I’m suggesting.”

“I know what you mean.” She looks away.

Then we just sit there, the silence growing louder and more awkward with every passing moment.

Because I know she’s thinking about the fact that we’ve always had chemistry. Always wanted to sleep together. Always wanted to see what there is to see.

Neither of us was in a position to go there so we agreed not to.

Getting married would change everything. And not just because we’re married on paper.

“We don’t have to do this,” I say when I can’t stand it anymore. “I just want you to know I’m willing, but if it would be easier for you with someone like Jordan…”

She wrinkles her nose. “No. Definitely not. If I’m going to do this, I would want it to be with you.”

I don’t respond, letting her get whatever it is off her chest.

“But if we’re married…it’s inevitable we’re going to sleep together.”

Oh, yeah.

“And that makes things messy. Because once we’re intimate, there’s no going back to being just friends. And then when we divorce…”

“I know.”

“That’s why we opted to stay just friends, because we both know there’s a spark. I don’t know how to unlight that match once it's lit.”

“I’ve thought about the same things, but it boils down to how much you want to stay.”

“More than anything.” Her eyes meet mine. “I really don’t want to go back, Aiden.”

“Then let’s get married tomorrow.” I reach out a hand but wait for her to put hers in it.

She looks at it for what feels like a decade.

Then, ever so slowly, as if she needs to use every last second to make her final decision, she slips her hand into mine.

“Okay.”

“I’ll call Coach and tell him the situation so I can skip practice.”

“You don’t have to?—”

“I do ,” I interject firmly. “We’re getting married. We have to go ring shopping.”

“I don’t need an engagement ring,” she says quickly.

“You do. You can’t marry an NHL player without a ring. It’s expected. If I don’t get you one, everyone will know something is off.”

“Oh. I guess that’s true.”

“I’ll pick you up early and we’ll go to my attorney’s office. If you want, you can get another attorney in the firm to read it on your behalf and?—”

“No.” She shakes her head. “I trust you.”

Why does that make me feel good?

“All right. Then we’ll go buy rings and head to the courthouse.”

“You make it sound so simple.”

“We don’t have time to fuck around,” I say with a shrug. “We can panic once it’s done.”

She frowns and then looks down at our linked hands.

“I’m in. But I have one question before we do this.”

“Shoot.”

“What’s in this for you? And don’t give me any bullshit about how you know it’s important to me. You’re marrying me, Aiden, and we both know that even though it’s not a love match, there’s friendship, chemistry, and attraction there. So I get to stay in the US? What do you get?”

I get you.

The thought comes and goes in a flash, but it’s jarring that those are the first words to come to mind.

I absolutely can’t say that out loud, though.

“I don’t know,” I say quietly. “I like you. There’s been this thing between us that doesn’t go away, but I figured we had time to figure it out. We’d spend time together, hang out with our friends, and get to know each other. If you go back to Slovakia, we can’t do that. And I guess… I want to.”

There.

An abridged version of the truth.

“You want to see what there is to see?”

“I think so.”

“And what happens if one of us catches feelings?”

Too late for that.

“We discuss. Like adults.”

Where did this thoughtful, mature version of me come from?

“You told me once you never wanted to get married again. And if you did, it wouldn’t be for a long time.”

I shrug. “Can’t a guy change his mind?”

She lifts her eyes to mine and one side of her mouth quirks up. “Yeah, I suppose you can.”

Holy fucking shit.

I’m getting married tomorrow.