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“You’re not serious,” Roger complains as he stares up at the building leading to where we will meet the skydiving instructors.

“Don’t tell me you’re scared,” I tease, nudging him with my shoulder.

His nervous gaze drops to mine, and I give him a wide, innocent smile.

“Come on. It’ll be fun.” I swing open the door and step inside.

Roger is a new friend I met during my journey to New York. I couldn’t stay in Rhode Island another day without the reminder of my brothers no longer being alive and the fact that I’ll never be able to go on crazy adventures with them. I couldn’t deal with the overwhelming grief that clouded every fiber of my being.

“Welcome to J & M skydiving. Do you have an appointment?” The young man at the front desk greets us with a friendly smile.

“Hi! Yes. My friend and I have an appointment at 2:30 with Mike and Jonny,” I reply, leaning against the counter.

He checks the computer in front of him and nods. “For Sarah and Roger?”

“Yeah,” I reply.

Reaching over, he grabs two clipboards and sets them on the countertop. “Please fill out and sign this waiver. I’ll let Mike and Jonny know you’re here.”

Taking the clipboards and grabbing two pens, I spin and hand one of them to Roger. His face is drawn tight.

“Oh, stop it, you big baby. It’ll be great,” I playfully chide.

He rolls his eyes and moves to sit in one of the seats in the sitting area.

Once the waivers are filled out, signed, and given back to the receptionist, we wait for our instructors to come and collect us.

I feel like the Energizer Bunny. Excitement blooms in my chest and radiates to every nerve in my body.

Mike and Jonny arrive, and we follow them to where the equipment is stored. They go over everything we need to know before we head toward the airplane.

“I’m going to fucking throw up,” Roger mutters, and I roll my eyes.

Mike chuckles as he helps me climb into the plane. “Don’t worry, man. It happens all the time.”

Settling into my seat, I grip the straps of the harness Jonny helped me in as the plane engines roar to life. Within seconds, the ground beneath races by. My breath catches the moment the tires lift off the ground and we are airborne. My stomach twists, my heart drums in my chest.

I feel alive.

“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck,” Roger chants. His eyes are closed tightly, and his face is pale.

I laugh the higher we go. When my eyes meet Jonny’s, he shoots me a wink.

Jonny is very attractive. He is tall, which is nice considering I stand at 5’10. He has sandy blonde hair and deep brown eyes. He has a slightly crooked tooth that I am absolutely obsessed with. It makes him less perfect, and I love it.

“Alright, are we ready?” Jonny says once my harness is attached to his.

Excitedly, I nod. A slight twinge of fear twists my stomach when I peer over the plane’s edge.

“Hell yeah!” I shout over the wind with a wide tooth-filled grin.

I glance over at Roger whose face is tinted green. His grip on the straps around his shoulders is stiff and his knuckles are white.

His panic-filled eyes meet mine and I smile softly. “You got this, Roger!”

“You’re fucking crazy!” He shouts back and I laugh whole-heartedly.

“One… Two… Three!” Jonny yells and we launch ourselves into the air.

My stomach flies into my throat and slam my eyes shut. The air whooshes passed my ears as we plummet through the air.

“Open your eyes!” Jonny’s voice is clouded by the wind, but I do what he says.

The land below is divided into an array of different sections. The intertwining roads are nearly invisible at this height.

“This is amazing!” I laugh.

I shift my gaze to the side when I see Roger and Mike diving next to us. Roger’s ridiculous shrieking causes Jonny to chuckle in my ear, sending heat down to my core.

“I hate you, Sarah! I hate you!” Roger screams and he slaps his hands over his face.

I roll my eyes and simply enjoy the fall.

* * *

So close.

I was so close to reaching that peak before the orgasm when Mr. Twopumpchump got overly excited after I told him to choke me, and he came with a weird whimper in my ear.

“I’m sorry,” Jonny says, tucking himself into his jeans.

“It’s fine. Could have happened to anyone,” I reply, pulling my shirt over my head.

“I can still get you off if you want?”

Not a chance.

“You know, I actually need to get going.” I slip on my sneakers and tie their laces.

“Oh… Um, well can I get your number?”

Once my laces are tied, I stand and face him. He rubs the back of his neck sheepishly.

“Look, Jonny, this has been… great. But I have no plans to see you again.”

Shock flashes over his face before he masks it.

“Yeah, I get it.” The slight clench of his jaw is the only sign of his annoyance about this situation.

Sorry, bud. You got off. I didn’t and this was probably top five of the worst sex I’ve ever had.

Grabbing my bag, I smile tightly at him before making my way down the hall and out the door.

* * *

“I’m going to miss you,” I say, pulling Roger into my arms.

He squeezes me tightly. “I’m going to miss you too. Don’t forget about me when you’re in the Big Apple.”

I pull away and hike my bag higher on my shoulder.

“How could I forget you? You made my first skydiving experience even more memorable.” I wink when he gives me a straight-faced glare.

“You’re awful,” He groans. “I’m never doing that again.”

I chuckle and then lightly knock his shoulder with my fist. “I’ll see you around, Roger.”

With a wave, I step onto the bus and find a window seat.

As we pull away from the station, Roger sends me a two-finger salute then walks away.

I dig into the front pocket of my backpack and pull out my headphones. I growl in frustration when I see the wires are a tangled mess.

“Son of a bitch,” I mutter and work to unravel the wad.

After what feels like an eternity, I place the earbuds into my ears and scroll through my playlists.

Settling on a random one, I lean my head against the headrest and close my eyes.

Flashing red and blue lights fill my vision. My lungs scream in agony. The smell of smoke penetrates my nasal cavity, coating my taste buds in a bitter, soot flavor.

Someone opens my eyelid wide, and I’m suddenly blinded by a bright light.

“Pupils are responsive,” a deep, slightly muffled voice says.

“Oxygen levels are really low, sitting at 65%, and her heart rate is 120 and rising,” another voice responds.

It’s then that a mask is placed over my face, the strap pressing against the back of my head.

I sag in relief when fresh, clean oxygen flows through the mask and into my suffocating lungs.

My mind is in a deep fog, barely registering that I’m being lifted and placed onto a gurney. I blink slowly, trying to focus my vision, trying to clear my mind enough to figure out what the fuck is going on.

“Clear!” A distant voice shouts, drawing my attention.

The blurred silhouettes of two people hovering above a body starts to come into focus.

My heart seizes. Images flash through my memory at blinding speed.

The fire.

Screaming.

The floor collapsing.

Xander pushing me out the window.

My brothers!

Arms are pressed against my shoulder, holding me onto the gurney when I scramble to propel myself toward them.

“Ma’am, you need to lie down. We are transporting you to the hospital. You’ve been in a fire.”

“No! My brothers! My brothers are in there!” My throat burns, making my voice sound scratchy.

I rip at the mask on my face, still fighting the EMT trying to hold me in place.

“Let me go! Please! Let me go!” I cry.

Another gurney rushes passed me with an unconscious Tommy. He’s rapidly loaded into the back of an ambulance before speeding away down the street.

“We need you to lay down so we can help you. Your brothers are being helped.”

“BP is 198/116!”

A blood curdling wail explodes from me when I see a fucking body bag on yet another gurney.

I can’t fucking breathe. My vision is tunneling, my entire body is trembling uncontrollably. My hand presses against my chest, my heart completely shattering, turning into the ashes drifting around us.

My mind becomes weightless, and I sway, falling back against the mattress.

“She’s losing consciousness.” The voice fades, replaced by a loud ringing.

I feel my soul dying when I see the two EMTs in the distance pull away from the body on the ground. Their heads fall to their chests, shoulders slumping.

My body gently jostles as I’m loaded into the ambulance.

My eyes fall closed, and the doors slam shut.

* * *

I wake with a gasp.

My heart pounds against my chest, echoing in my ears. A thin veil of sweat lines my hairline. My lungs work in hyperdrive as I pant.

The inside of the bus is quiet as everyone sleeps during the long ride.

It was just a nightmare.

I blink to clear the sting from my eyes then rest against the seat once more.

I struggle to catch my breath and calm my racing heart.

The ache in my chest amplifies with each mile I put between me and the life I’m leaving behind.

Grimacing, I rub the heel of my palm against the spot, but it doesn’t lessen the pain.

Hopefully, all this effort I’m putting into running from this burn in my soul is worth it.