Page 8

Chapter 8

Julia

I’m in the kitchen, making a cup of hot chocolate and humming to myself. There’s nothing I like more than a slow morning. I don't have first period, and I am milking every minute of it. I think about the weekend, and as much as I’m trying to manage expectations, I really am looking forward to a date with Graham. I start to sing softly while a smile spreads across my face.

“I’ve always loved when you sing,” Mom says from the kitchen door. “You know, we are looking for someone to sing a song or two at the gala this year. What do you think?”

“Ha. I don’t think so. Remember last time? Maybe baby steps, like actually sing in the kitchen and not stop when someone walks in.” I won’t tell her, but I do want to sing.

“I know you can do it, baby.” Mom grabs a mug and makes herself a cup of hot chocolate. “Remember that. You’ve got a whole group of people to support you. You don’t have to sing at the gala, but I want to challenge you to look for other opportunities to stretch yourself, like maybe the high school talent show.” She smiles before taking a small sip of her hot chocolate, closing her eyes as she savors it. How did she know exactly what I was thinking about? Moms are magic. “I love you, Jules. Have a great day. Don’t forget what I said. Now, I’m going to read a book with this cup of cocoa.” She walks out of the kitchen with a little shimmy.

***

I let out a deep breath and quickly glance over my shoulder, hoping I don't see anyone I know in the hallway at school. Just a couple of kids, canoodling on a bench, as my dad likes to say. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about what my mom said this morning. Is this a good challenge, a good stretch? Is it too much? It is a good opportunity for Graham to check something off the list, but maybe I shouldn’t think like that. I bite my lip in frustration and wish I knew what to do.

I shake my hands and grab the pen hanging by the talent show sign up sheet. Every year, Desert Valley High School has a Christmas talent show. Emphasis on talent,and it is a dream of mine to perform there. Each year is more impressive than the last. It’s a big community event, not to be missed. I’ve tried to convince myself the last two years but never manage. Maybe I’ll volunteer backstage this year, see if that baby step can help get me in the right direction. But, I really do want Graham to complete that list and number twelve, ‘sit front row at my performance,’ requires a performance of some kind. It’s right there in the list. Might as well audition for the talent show. I scoff at the thought, as if it were so simple.

“Thank you, Mrs. Sundin. I’ll go find that sign up right now!” an unfamiliar voice sounds from the choir room. I drop the pen and take a step back.

“Oh! Hi! I’m Josie. Well, Josephina, technically, but I don’t love it, so I decided to go by Josie instead once I moved here.” A short girl with dyed black hair and a line of freckles across her nose and cheeks sticks her hand out, waiting for me to shake it. I take a few deep breaths, trying to calm down my racing heart. I get it. It’s silly, but even thinking about singing in front of people makes me nervous. Josie has a confused expression and slowly lowers her hand. I grab it before she can, not wanting her to feel rejected.

“Hey, I’m Julia Pritchett. It’s so nice to meet you! When did you move here?”

“Oh, just last week. My parents gave me a couple of days to ‘adjust’ before making me start school. I think adjust actually means unpack and do their errands, but whatever. Also, what kind of crazy parents make you start the week before fall break? Ridiculous. So, are you signing up?” She gestures towards the sign-up sheet.

“Oh, uh, no?”

“No? You aren’t sure?”

“Well, I, uh, hmm. Well, I was thinking about it. I don’t normally, but then you startled me, and I am starting to think it was a sign or something. No singing for Julia.” I say, marking the end of my sentence with a one finger salute. An actual salute, not flipping her off.

“Hmm, well I am certainly going to sign up. You should too! I’m not the best singer; I won’t make anyone cringe or anything but I’m not great. I just lo-ove being the center of attention.” Josie laughs and grabs the pen. She signs her name with a flourish. I smile to myself, thinking she absolutely needs to meet Chloe. They are kindred spirits. Josie holds the pen out to me, raising her eyebrow in question.

“J!” Chloe calls as I reach for the pen. “Oh my gosh! Are you signing up for the talent show? This is amazing. What are you going to sing?”

“Uhm. Well.” I’m desperately trying to deflect but she caught me red-handed. “I thought maybe I’d sign up Nathan. You know, as a prank?”

“Classic! Yes, please.” Chloe laughs, nodding towards the paper in encouragement. “Do it.”

“Who’s Nathan? Your boyfriend?” Josie asks, her eyes darting between us.

“Boyfriend! No, he’s her twin. Hi, I’m Chloe. Are you new?”

“Yep, Josie. First day. Ready to jump right in and embrace a new high school by singing in the talent show.”

“Oh, perfect. We are always in need of new blood. Come eat lunch with us! We can do it as soon as Julia signs Nathan up.” Chloe links her arm through Josie’s.

“Oh, I don’t know. I can think of something better.” I start to walk away from the sheet. “Come on, let’s go. We can brainstorm on the way to the cafeteria.”

Chloe tilts her head in thought. “Okay, deal. We’ll come up with something awesome. I do love to prank him. Hmm, let’s see. Could we bleach his hair? Leave a can of tuna under the seat in his car?”

“Tuna! Oh my gosh! How gross. It’s so hot here. How about we Oreo his car instead? Still annoying but not as nasty,” Josie says, fitting right in our group.

“Oreo his car?” Chloe asks.

“Yeah! You open the Oreo and stick the frosting side onto the car,” Josie explains.

“Absolutely not. We share a car. Try again.” I laugh, while trying to convince myself that I can build up the courage to sign up another time.

Chloe and Josie chat about everything and nothing the entire walk to the cafeteria, with me answering when necessary. Chloe talks a lot and Josie seems to be able to keep up, so I can just listen and laugh.

“Whoa. Who is that ?” Josie asks, coming to a stop. I track her gaze straight to our regular lunch table. Graham, Nathan, and one of their friends, Josh Fletcher, are sitting there, huddled around something on the table. Nathan has dark blond hair and a decent tan, a result of playing sports in Arizona. Josh is a redhead with a skin tone to match. I’m not entirely sure who she’s talking about, but it looks like she’s staring at Graham. My Graham. Wait, no. Just Graham. Graham Kealoha. Nathan’s Graham. The school’s Graham. Friendly neighborhood Graham.

“Hmm, Jules. Did you hear Josie? Who is that fine-looking man?” Chloe taps her lip in fake consideration. Josie looks back and forth between us, Chloe’s face mocking and mine sure to be red.

“Well, that depends. The blond is my brother, Nathan; the redhead is our friend, Josh; and… the other one is Graham. Kealoha. My brother’s best friend,” I say tightly. I promise I try to be cool. But I’m not. I’m jealous. I admit it. And you can’t blame me. Josie is pretty and fun and new. Everyone likes new things. That’s why birthdays and Christmas are so awesome.

“Only your brother’s best friend? Are you sure? I clearly stepped into something here,” Josie asks. “If he’s yours, nice work. The other two are pretty cute too. I have no attachment to any of them, so I can switch focus like that. But if he isn’t yours…” Josie trails off, her eyes lighting with interest. I make wide eyes at Chloe, a little taken aback by Josie. Chloe laughs, clearly enjoying herself.

“He’s not mine.” I laugh, a little higher pitched than normal. “He’s everyone’s. The school’s. The neighborhood’s, even.” Chloe and Josie give me matching confused looks and I force out a laugh. “Kidding. You’ll get used to my sense of humor. Let’s introduce you to the guys.” I grab both of their hands, dragging them the rest of the way to the table. I notice they are all studying my list. My stomach warms with the realization that Graham is recruiting help. I knew Nathan was helping, and he asked if he could ask others for help, but I didn’t realize he was going to show people the actual list. I take a moment to evaluate how that makes me feel. He didn’t ask me. Am I bothered? That list is a little embarrassing. But, he's putting in effort. A small smile lifts my lips when I realize that I’m okay with it, and Graham makes eye contact with me. I get lost in his eyes for a few seconds, and his lips grow into a genuine smile. I'm not entirely sure how long I'm staring at him, but long enough that Chloe feels the need to elbow me in the side.

“Oh, sorry. Hey guys, this is Josie… uhm, I don’t actually know your last name.”

“Thomas. Josie Thomas. I just moved here last week.” She smiles at the guys, looking at Graham a little bit longer than I think is strictly necessary.

The other two guys glance up in unison, say hi, and then in the most obvious display of interest I have ever seen, Nathan double takes so hard, I swear I hear his neck crack. He jumps up from the bench, sticking out his hand.

“Hi! Hey! I am Pritchett. Well, Nathan. Nathan Pritchett. Call me Nathan. Or Nate.”

“Hey, I’m Josh.” Josh waves from across the table, sparing Nathan an entertained glance. “And this is Graham Kealoha.” Graham folds up the copy of the list and tucks it in his pocket before giving her his whole attention.

“Ah, yes, the brother’s best friend,” Josie almost purrs.

“Hmm, okay. I don’t know your brother but I’m sure he’s a good dude.” Graham smiles. “Welcome to Desert Valley. It’s a great school, full of awesome people, and by the looks of it, you’ll fit right in.” Graham winks. He winked at her. Winked. He just folded up my boyfriend list, the list that he begged me for last weekend, and now he’s winking at the new girl? Come on. I not so gently toss my lunch bag onto the table and climb over the bench.

Chloe slides in next to me and whispers, “Your jealousy is showing.”

“I know,” I mumble without thinking. “Wait. No. I don’t know anything. Jealousy? No jealousy here. Josie can have him.” Right as I finish saying that, I meet Graham’s eye, catching a flash of confusion and maybe hurt. Crap, did I say that too loud? I decide right then and there that I have nothing to contribute to this lunch hour. I grab my ear buds, turn on some music, and start eating with much more enthusiasm than I actually feel.

I spend the next twenty-five minutes half listening and half berating myself for poorly hiding my jealousy. Josie is leaning across the table, very focused on Graham; Josh is studying like always; Nathan looks a little like a lost puppy, trying to insert himself into the conversation, but not getting much traction; and Chloe is sitting back with a big smirk on her face, enjoying herself, always happy to watch the world burn, randomly checking her phone. Because it already isn’t awkward enough, Ginger comes up behind Graham. She throws her arms around, giving him a hug from behind. He grabs her hands, squeezing them for a second before pulling them away, and spins on the bench. I discreetly mute my music because I’m a masochist, I guess. I hear Ginger flirting with Graham, and you know what I don’t hear? Graham ignoring her. He is definitely engaging with her. I see Josie lean toward Chloe.

“Who’s that? She looks like one of those twins from all the 90s movies.”

“What?! The Olsen twins? Seriously, I love them. Don’t compare Ginger Cole to them! She’s public enemy number one.”

“Hey! That’s not true! She’s perfectly friendly.” Everyone at the table stops talking and looks at me. That’s when I remember my earbuds are still in, and I absolutely spoke too loudly. I’m fumbling, trying to figure out how to explain my outburst, when the bell rings and I grab all of my lunch trash to throw away.

“Here, let me take that rubbish.” Graham takes it all out of my hands and I glance over my shoulder. The green-eyed monster on my shoulder grins when we see Ginger walking the other direction, a little dejected. I look at him and smile, handing him the trash. Or rubbish. I love when he calls it rubbish. It’s an adorable little Graham-ism he got from his dad.

“Rubbish? Cute.” Josie smiles at him. Okay, I take it back. Not adorable. The green-eyed monster is cracking its fingers, gearing up for a battle.

“Oh, ha. Yeah, my dad grew up in Hawaii. That’s what he calls it. It slips out every once in a while.”

“I love Hawaii!” Josie gushes. “Does that mean you call all adults aunty and uncle, and love pineapple and Spam? What island are you from?”

“Well, I’m from Arizona. Born and raised. But my dad grew up on O`ahu. North Shore. And yes, I do call adults aunty and uncle, but not all of them. I do love Spam, and pineapple is good but mango is better. Hey, it was good chatting with you but I gotta run. My class is on the other side of campus. I’ll see you around.” Graham jogs out of the cafeteria, ditching all the garbage in the bin on his way.

“Are you sure he’s not yours?” Josie is talking to me but her eyes are laser-focused on Graham.

“P-positive.” I shake my head, frustrated that I stuttered. Way to show your hand, Julia. I open my mouth to tell her that we are going on a date, and it's a bet and nothing before I decide that would be even more telling. I can’t even think about it without rambling; trying to verbalize it seems like a bad idea. I close my mouth so hard that my teeth clank together. Josie narrows her eyes at me for a second, trying to get a read on me.

“Hmm, okay, well, I’ll see you later. I need to redownload my schedule, then we can compare?”

“Absolutely!” Chloe says. I glare at Chloe a little before I remember I’m not jealous of Josie. I told her he wasn’t mine. I need to act like it. Besides, Josie seems cool. There’s always space for more friends.

“Yep, I gotta run though. Chloe can give you my number. Text me,” I say over my shoulder on my way to class. “If I’m late again, I’m gonna get detention and my parents will kill me.” I pick up the pace, pushing open the doors that Graham just left through, in the opposite direction of where Chloe needs to go.

“Hey!” I look up to see Graham leaning against the wall in the hallway. “It’s okay, you know.”

“What’s okay?” I ask as he falls into step with me. “Being jealous. It’s pretty cute. Besides, you only need to ask, and I can be all yours.” Graham winks, slipping a folded-up piece of paper and a lollipop into my hand. My face flushes as my grin grows, staring at the paper that is undoubtedly another love note. I look up, surprised that Graham is still there, watching my reaction. I thought he would’ve headed to class. I open my mouth to say something but Zack, a guy from the wrestling team, comes up behind Graham and wraps his arms around Graham’s neck. Graham reacts on instinct, the training he had from junior high and ninth-grade wrestling kicking in. Graham grabs his arm, loosening his hold, pulling Zack off balance. In a fluid motion, Graham ducks his head and reverses on Zack, with him ending up in a headlock instead of Graham being in one. Graham releases him, and they laugh together while they do some kind of man handshake. Zack glances at me, smiles, and nods before turning back to Graham. I start to walk to my class, but Graham grabs my wrist, keeping me here. He pulls out his phone and after a second, my phone buzzes.

Graham

Wait. I want to walk you to class.

I smile at my phone before tucking it into my pocket and nodding at Graham. Graham smiles at me and turns his attention to Zack,

“Dang, bro. We could really use you this year with moves like that!”

Graham shakes his head, “Nah, bro. Been there, done that. It’s not for me.”

“Not for you?” Zack scoffs. “You were well on your way to state when you quit freshman year. How could it not be for you?”

Graham rubs the back on his neck. “Yeah. It’s a lot, ya know? I thought I liked it, but then I realized I don’t. It took hours every week and honestly, it was pretty boring. So I quit. Might as well give someone who wants it the time on the mat.”

Zack shakes his head before dropping his chin to his chest. “Man. I’d kill for your skill, and you just walk away like it’s nothing! After almost three years! And not just wrestling. I remember playing rec soccer, baseball, football, and basketball with you. You were always the best.”

Graham throws his head back in laughter while I look at him, my heart sinking in my chest.

“I am pretty awesome at almost everything,” Graham says, flexing his chest in anticipation of Zack hitting him. I stand there watching Graham and Zack mess around, joking and teasing about sports and how Graham doesn’t care . I remember him playing football when he was a kid. Well, really any sport that Uncle Kai could enroll Graham in, he played. And he was good. He worked hard at first, and every time—every single time—he quit. And if Zack isn’t exaggerating, he wrestled for a long time. He just gave it up. Just like he’ll give up on us. That voice in my head reminds me to shore up my defenses. I watch Zack and Graham hit each other’s chests to say goodbye, and Zack nods at me before running off to class. Graham turns, a smile on his face, before he makes eye contact. He must see what I am thinking on my face because he tenses up.

“Jules? You okay?”

I stare at him for a few seconds before shaking my head. Now isn’t the time. Besides, it won’t matter. I know people try to convince him to stick to stuff, but it clearly doesn’t work. I’m not willing to waste my breath. “I’m fine. Good. I’ll see ya later.” I grasp my backpack straps with both hands, dropping the lollipop to the floor and crushing the note.

“Hey, be careful with these. They’re important. Just like you.” Graham winks and I cock my head in disbelief before walking away.

***

Graham

“Okay. Here’s the plan. There’s that old mattress in the garage my mom said I could use. So, we’ll go get new sheets and cover the mattress with blankets and pillows. You’ll drop her off at Fletcher’s field where the truck will be waiting. You’ll drive us around, listening to ‘A Whole New World’, then once we pass the tree line, park and we’ll watch the comet shower! Boom. Magic carpet ride. See the lights. Check and check. And of course, we’ll have lollipops and hot chocolate. Magical, right?” I explain to Nathan. We’re sitting in his front yard, and I’m gesturing as if he can see into my garage.

“So magical.” Nathan deadpans. “Dude. I just need ear plugs. I don’t want to hear your date. I’ll go to the store. I’ll drive. You’ll watch the sky. I’ll drive back to my car, and that’s it. You can bring Julia home in the truck.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to bring Chloe?” I waggle my eyebrows at Nathan. “I bet she’s available. Oo, or Josie.”

“Sure. I’ll ask her. I bet that Julia would love to have someone to focus on besides you.”

“Never mind. I take it back. Just me and her. And you. But don’t talk to her, and no matter what, don’t ask Chloe or Josie. I was joking.”

“Graham. I would never ask Chloe out. You know that. Just, no,” Nathan says, swinging his keys on his finger as he heads towards his car. “Let’s go. Believe it or not, I don’t actually want to spend my whole Saturday planning a romantic date for my sister.”

“And that is why you’re my best friend!” I wrap my arm around Nathan’s shoulder, giving him a goofy hug. I am kidding, but Nathan’s willingness to do whatever he can to help out a friend is incredible. I will never take that for granted. “Also, now’s not the time because it’s about me, but don’t think I didn’t notice that you didn’t say you’d never ask out Josie. We are definitely circling back to that later.” My smile grows as his face flushes a light pink. Nathan shakes his head and goes back to getting things ready, pretending as if I didn’t say anything. We spend the next hour getting everything set up, and by the time we are done, I’m bouncing with excitement.

“Nathan. I get it, it’s weird for you, but can you believe that Julia is finally going out with me? I feel like I have been waiting for this my whole life. Although, is she okay? We had a weird thing at lunch this week.”

Nathan narrows his eyes in thought. “I didn’t notice anything. But we don’t talk about you all the time.” I catch Nathan’s hand before he makes contact with my shoulder. “Let’s go to your house and play PlayStation. Or watch a baseball game. The Diamondbacks are playing. We can bet on the winner.”

“You and your bets, bro.” I smirk, shaking my head.

“Hey, you didn’t seem to mind that much last time,” Nathan jokes.

“You’re right. What are the terms?”

***

Julia

“Chloe. A date with Graham.” I clasp my hands and look in my bedroom mirror before spinning around to face her. “I wish I knew what we were doing. All he told me was—”

“A magical adventure and dress for outside. I know. You’ve only told me a million times. You look great. Ready for a magical outdoor date,” Chloe promises. I look down at my outfit one more time: mid-length shorts, a green shirt to complement my eyes that hits right at the waist of my shorts, a flannel shirt tied at my waist, and white canvas shoes. Nothing overly fancy but I feel cute, which seems most important. I turn around to critique my hair in the mirror one more time. Chloe curled my blond hair into perfect beachy waves and used her makeup magic to make my eyes pop. I take a deep breath and smile. “I think I’m ready.”

“Do you have gum? Or mints?” Chloe asks absently, staring at her phone.

“What? Why would I need that?” I cover my flushed cheeks with my hands. Chloe shakes her head in surprise, clearly checking back into the conversation.

“In case he kisses you, duh. He’s been wanting to kiss you for, what, nine years? And don’t try to tell me that you don’t feel the same way.”

I stare into space, remembering when I was nine, just how badly I wanted that kiss.

***

Seven Years Earlier

“One Mississippi, two Mississippi, three Mississ—Ahh!” I scream under my blanket as the lightning flashes. “I am nine years old. I can handle a little thunderstorm,” I say. “It’s just a storm. It’s just a storm.” Thunder crashes outside so loudly, it shakes the entire house. It woke me up out of a dead sleep. I must’ve fallen asleep while I was reading. “AHH! It’s not just a storm. It’s not just a storm.” I wrap myself up in my blanket and run for the door. I hate these monsoons that come out of nowhere. It’s three o’clock in the afternoon, and the sky is covered with clouds and dust that makes it look more like 10 p.m. “Mom! Mom!!” I yell as I throw my door open, running into the hallway. A small pair of arms catches me right before I crash into someone.

“Julia? Julia! Are you okay? What’s wrong?” Graham says, his eyes taking in the tears running down my cheeks.

“Nothing. Nothing. I just need to talk to my mom,” I say as I frantically wipe the tears from my face.

“She took Nate to the store. Mom and I were here visiting and stayed to be with you while they were gone. Your mom just called to say they are waiting out the storm." He pulls me to the kitchen. "Come on, my mom is making cookies.”

“Chocolate chip?” I ask hopefully.

“Of course. What other kind is there?”

“Nathan likes snickerdoodles.”

“Well, that’s fine. Those are good too but nothing compares to a good chocolate chip cookie. They make everything better! And my mom makes the best ones! Let’s go downstairs and watch the storm through the back door.” Graham grabs my hand and starts tugging me towards the door.

He’s holding my hand , I think, letting him pull me along.

“Wait!” I say, as another thunder crashes with lightning flashing at almost the same time. “I… I’m…”

“What? What’s wrong?” Graham asks when I don't finish.

“Uhm. I’m scared. Where’s my mom again? She was here when I fell asleep.”

“She had to take Nathan to the store.” Graham says distractedly as he glances around the hallway. Suddenly his eyes light up. “I know! Let’s build a fort around the TV. We can turn it up really loud and watch whatever you want. And when the cookies are done, I’ll bring you some!”

I smile, tears filling my eyes again. “That sounds awesome. Thank you.” I fling my arms around his neck and hold on tight. I feel his lips lightly brush my hair and pull back in surprise. Graham’s face turns red as he glances at my lips. Is he going to kiss me? I think excitedly. He starts to lean forward, closing his eyes and puckering his lips.

“Graham!” his mom calls. “Cookies are ready!” Graham jumps back, letting go of me, spinning on his heel to head down the stairs.

“Let’s go.” Graham yells a little too loudly. “We have a fort to make and cookies to eat!” he says, sprinting down the stairs. I stand there staring for a second, thinking about what could’ve been my first kiss. Lightning flashes, brightening the hallway and scaring me into action, following him down the stairs.

About thirty minutes later, the fort is made and a movie is blaring. Graham and I have a plate of cookies, and we each have a glass of milk. We sit on top of a towel in case of a spill. I look over at Graham and smile as he laughs at the movie. As soon as he leaves, I am going to add cookies and hugs to my boyfriend list. They really do make everything better.

***

My eyes come back into focus when I realize that Chloe is still talking.

“J, just please, for me, try and have fun. Give into the date of it all. I know you won’t admit it, but I know you. You like him. Let yourself like him. Being excited to date him isn’t a commitment to a ring and two point five kids. Just be in the moment, k?” She stares at me while I swallow deeply and nod.

“I’ll try.”

“Now, I’ve accentuated your beauty, given you a pep talk, so I’m out. Tell me everything later. See if you can sneak a picture. I’ll be anxiously waiting. Ta-ta.” Chloe blows me a kiss over her shoulder as she walks out the door.