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“You mean my ass? And no, she did not.”
“What made you go, anyway? I told Tess not to buy you that pass to the gym, because you wouldn’t use it.”
Annoyance flares in my chest at the way he called her “Tess.” I don’t like it one fucking bit. It’s only Landon, I remind myself. Of all the shit I have to worry about right now, Landon is the least of my concerns.
“Because I was enraged, and I felt like I was going to break everything in that goddamned apartment. So when I noticed the voucher as I was pulling out all of the drawers in the dresser, I grabbed it, put my shoes on, and took off.”
“You pulled out all the drawers? Tessa’s going to kill you . . .” He shakes his head and finally takes a seat on the stack of mulch bags. I don’t know why he agreed to help his mum move all this shit around, anyway.
“She won’t see it . . . it’s not her place anymore,” I remind him, trying to keep the edge out of my voice.
He looks at me guiltily. “Sorry.”
“Yeah.” I sigh; I don’t even have a witty comeback.
“It’s hard for me to feel bad for you when you could be there with her,” Landon says after a few beats of silence.
“Fuck you.” I lean my head back against the wall, and I can feel him staring at me.
“It doesn’t make sense,” he adds.
“Not to you.”
“Or her. Or anyone.”
“I don’t have to explain myself to anyone,” I snap.
“Then why are you even here?”
Instead of answering him, I look around the greenhouse, unsure of what I’m doing in this place myself. “I don’t have anywhere else to go.”
Does he think that I don’t miss her every fucking second? That I wouldn’t much rather be with her than standing here talking to him?
He gives me a sideways look. “What about your friends?”
“You mean the one who fucking drugged Tessa? Or the other one who set me up in order to tell her about the bet.” I start counting them on my fingers to add to the dramatic effect. “Or you could mean the one who is constantly trying to get into her pants. Shall I go on?”
“Guess not. Though I could have told you that your friends sucked,” he says in an annoying tone. “So what are you going to do?”
Deciding that keeping the peace is better than murdering him, I just shrug. “Exactly what I’m doing now.”
“So you’re going to hang out with me and mope around?”
“I’m not moping. I’m doing what you told me to do and bettering myself,” I mock, using air quotes. “Have you talked to her since she left?” I ask.
“Yeah, she texted me this morning to tell me she arrived.”
“She’s at Vance’s, isn’t she?”
“Why don’t you find out for yourself?”
Fuck, Landon is annoying. “I know she is. Where else would she be?”
“With that Trevor guy,” Landon is quick to suggest. And his smirk makes me reconsider the stay of execution I had just granted him. If I tackled him, it wouldn’t hurt much; he’s only about three feet off the ground anyway. It probably wouldn’t even leave a bruise . . .
“I forgot about fucking Trevor,” I groan, rubbing harshly at my temples. Trevor is almost as infuriating as Zed. Only, I believe that Trevor does actually have good intentions when it comes to Tessa, which only upsets me even more. It makes him more dangerous.
“So what’s next in Project Self-Improvement?” Landon smiles, but it fades quickly and his expression turns serious. “I’m really proud of you for doing this, you know. It’s nice to see you actually trying for once, instead of making an effort for an hour, then going back to the way you were the moment she forgives you. It’ll mean a lot to her to see you really following through on these changes.”
I drop my feet and rock in the chair slightly. Talking like this is stirring something up in me. “Don’t try to lecture me. I haven’t done shit yet; it’s only been a day.” A long, miserable, lonely day.
Landon’s eyes go wide in sympathy. “No, I’m serious. You didn’t turn to alcohol and you haven’t gotten into a fight, you haven’t been arrested, and I know you came to talk to your dad.”
My mouth drops open. “He told you?” That fucker.
“No, he didn’t tell me. I live here, and I saw your car.”
“Oh . . .”
“I think you talking to him really would mean a lot to Tessa,” he continues.
“Would you just stop?” I say, imploring him with a quick hunch of my shoulders. “Fuck. You’re not my shrink. Stop acting like you’re better than me and I’m some damaged fucking animal that you need to—”
“Why can’t you just graciously accept a compliment?” Landon says over me. “I never said I was better than you. All I’m trying to do is be there for you as a friend. You don’t have anyone—you said it yourself, and now that you let Tessa move to Seattle, you don’t have a single person to give you moral support.” He stares at me but I look away. “You have to stop pushing people away, Hardin. I know you don’t like me—you hate me because you think I’m somewhat responsible for some of the issues you have with your dad, but I care deeply for Tessa and you, whether you want to hear that or not.”
“I don’t want to hear it,” I fire back at him. Why does he always have to say shit like this? I came here to . . . I don’t know, talk to him. Not to talk to him . . . not to have him tell me how much he cares about me.