Page 37 of Accidentally Falling For My Best Friend (Chicago Awakenings #2)

Oak gets the football, and turns toward his younger brothers looking for an opening.

They’re both being covered, so I raise my hands, not needing to do any more to draw his attention.

His throw is a little long and I rush to get under it just in time.

As soon as I have possession, I’m knocked to the ground by a heavy weight colliding into my side.

The fall is more disorienting than painful, and I do a quick check to make sure my pump and monitor are still in place, but I’m good.

Before I can even get my bearings to figure out what happened, Oakley is dragging Lincoln off of me and shoving him away with both hands.

“What the fuck are you doing? This is flag football, you fucking asshole!” Oakley’s yelling right in Lincoln’s face, shoving him back again.

Lincoln looks just as surprised as I feel at Oakley’s outrage, muttering, “I tripped. It was an accident,” as he backs away.

I’ve never seen Oakley yell at anyone. Even when he’s fought with his brothers in the past, it was never like this.

Everyone seems to be frozen in place, unsure of how to handle his unusual reaction.

Sure, it's flag football, but there have been years where people get way too into it—I’ve seen Oakley himself trip or push his brothers in his efforts to win.

I might know exactly what happened just now, but the fall felt awkward enough that I’d believe it was accidental.

But even if it wasn’t, this reaction is extreme.

“You could have fucking hurt him!” Oakley scolds, face turning red now as he continues to glare at his brother.

Beckett seems to be the only one who can move, rushing to Oakley’s side.

He grabs his hand and mutters something to him about calming down, but I don’t think Oak’s even noticed Beck’s there because he still looks about ready to swing at Lincoln.

“It was an accident, man,” Jordan insists, stepping in front of Lincoln so that Oakley can’t push him again. Jordan was on our team, so if he’s on Lincoln’s side, Oakley really has no reason to be freaking out like he is.

I finally shake myself out of whatever shock I’m in. Cody and Adrian are here now too, offering to help me stand, and I walk over to Oakley’s other side.

“Oak, I’m fine,” I say gently, putting my hand on his arm. I feel his shoulders drop as he physically relaxes, turning to meet my gaze. “I’m okay,” I repeat, hoping to settle the anger and concern I see shining in his eyes.

He takes a deep breath, his gaze pinging between Lincoln and me, before he finally mutters, “Sorry for freaking out. Just be more careful.”

Lincoln apologizes to me, but I wave him off. I really am okay. Oakley’s reaction left me more shaken than the fall itself.

“Well, let's get back to it then,” Oak says, laughing awkwardly as he picks up the discarded ball and tosses it to Beckett .

I exchange a concerned look with Beckett, both of us unsure about how to handle Oak’s outburst. Eventually, he shrugs and the game resumes.

It’s more subdued than before, and it takes quite a few plays before any of the taunting begins again.

Oak stays pretty quiet, but after another hour of play without any further incidents, our team ends up winning by one touchdown.

Oakley will get to keep the trophy for another year, but he isn’t even bragging about it.

It’s too cold to be outside for much longer, so we all head in.

Oak’s grandparents have a huge meal catered, but most of it’s prepared early in the day so that the staff can make it home to spend time with their own families.

Oak is still being quiet and I overheard Beck taunting Lincoln about beating him in pool, so I think everyone else was headed to the large game room in their basement.

I grab Oaks’s arm before he can follow the crowd downstairs.

“Hey, why don’t we hang out with Duke and Spot in his room for a bit.

” I don’t love being in huge crowds of people all day, so the Caldwells are used to me excusing myself to spend time with their dog, but I also just want a minute alone with Oak to see if he’s okay.

Spot has his own full-sized bedroom. There’s a queen bed, a doghouse in the corner in case he wants the privacy, a TV to watch dog videos, and a huge bin full of toys for him to play with.

Oak’s grandparents don’t mess around. Spot is one of their children and they treat him as such.

I don’t remember his grandpa being such a softie when we were younger, but in his retirement he’s become obsessed with their dog, and I know Beck and Cody are very similar in how they’ve been spoiling Duke.

Oak sits on the edge of the bed, patting his lap for Spot to come and join him.

Duke is still warming up to everyone here, so he heads for the little doghouse.

Oak’s super focused on petting Spot, not talking like he normally would be.

He doesn’ t even look my way when I sit right next to him so that our thighs are touching.

“So, do you want to tell me what happened out there?” I ask, gently bumping our shoulders together.

He huffs out a big breath. “No.”

“Okay, but will you?” I push. If he really didn’t want to talk about it, I’d give him space.

But Oakley and I don’t know the meaning of that word.

He always wants to talk things through with me, and his silence is kind of freaking me out.

Has today been too much already? We’ve barely had to interact in front of other people, I don’t think we’ve been different than we normally are, but maybe after his outburst he’s worried about his family suspecting something between us.

Adrian already knows. Maybe we’re being more obvious than I thought.

That doesn’t explain the freak out, though.

Spot jumps off to join Duke as Oak lays his upper half back on the bed with his feet still on the ground, rubbing his face as he lets out a deep groan.

“Fuck, Park, I don’t even know what happened.

One minute I was passing the ball and the next I was screaming in Lincoln’s face.

I don’t think I’ve ever wanted to punch someone more. ”

“Was pretending we’ve never hooked up in front of your family too stressful?” I ask. I don’t know what would happen if Oak decides to change his mind now.

His eyes widen in both shock and defense. “What? No. I’ve barely even thought about what they would think.”

“So, why did you freak out?”

He sits back up looking me right in the eyes. “You really don’t get it, do you?”

“Get what?”

“I freaked out because I thought he hurt you!” Oak stands up, running his fingers through his hair as he paces in front of me.

“I saw him on top of you on the ground and I just saw red. I’ve always been protective of you, but…

I don’t know.” He huffs out a big sigh and I feel helpless, wanting to fix whatever is causing him to look so tortured.

“If I’m being honest Parker, my first instinct was to drop down to the ground, check you over and then if you were okay, to kiss you.

To ignore all of the people around and be able to feel for myself that you were fine and that my fear was unfounded. ”

I suck in a sharp breath. He wanted to kiss me to make himself feel better?

Because he was so worried that I was hurt?

That’s not what we are. That isn’t best friends just fooling around with a guy for the first time behavior.

Obviously, we’ve kissed a lot by now, but other than the first one in front of the girls, the kissing has always led to more. It’s foreplay, we don’t casually kiss.

He sits back down, avoiding my confused gaze, taking my hand in his and focusing there. “I think I was upset that I couldn’t do that, that I can’t just kiss you whenever I want, and I lashed out at Lincoln instead.”

Kiss me whenever he wants? What is he saying? Could he feel the same way for me that I do for him?

Stop. He said kiss, not marry, calm down. He doesn’t mean anything by it.

Fuck, would it even matter if he does?

Even if Oakley decided that he was okay with giving up that traditional wife and kids daydream that he’s always talked about, even if my search history might include information on surrogacy, adoption, and fostering, would we really be willing to risk over twenty years of friendship to start dating?

What if we tried to actually date and broke up?

Would I be willing to give up my career I’ve spent half of my life building?

I could lose everything: my job, my house, his family that I consider my own.

I don’t even want to think about what I would do if I lost Oakley himself. My job is all about calculating risks and planning accordingly with the company’s finances. There’s just no need to risk everything when I already have so much that makes me happy just the way things are.

Being with him in private is already so much more than I ever thought I’d have for myself.

I try to focus back on the conversation we were having, making an effort to keep my tone light. “So, why have you been all mopey still if you know that I’m okay?”

I squeeze his hand and he finally looks up at me before muttering, “I guess I’ve been doing a lot of thinking today.” He sits up a bit straighter. “I’m already bummed you won’t be here for Christmas.”

See he isn’t saying he wants more with me . He’s just upset we’ll miss our tradition with his family’s Christmas.

I squeeze his hand again, earning a sad smile. “I’ll only be gone for a few days and that isn’t happening for a whole month. Let's try to just enjoy this holiday, and we can stress about the next one another day.”

He rolls his eyes at me. “Fine.”

“Stop with the eye rolls, brat,” I tease with a smile, and he finally perks up for real.

We spend a few minutes playing with Spot and Duke and the food is quickly announced as ready.

Oak’s grandparents have a large formal dining room that’s off their living room, and for the amount of people that are here, they’ve added tables extending the dining table into the other rooms in order to fit everyone.

I sit with Oakley to my right, Adrian to my left, and Oakley finally returns to his normal happy self as we chat with his family and their friends.

The food is delicious. I try not to overindulge in the carb-heavy options, but the turkey was prepared perfectly, and there’s a ton of veggies to choose from.

We all go around the room to say what we’re thankful for, Adrian makes everyone laugh when he announces that he’s thankful for hockey butts, and I nearly choke when Oakley says he’s thankful for new experiences.

I manage to find my voice in time to give my standard answer that I’m thankful that the Caldwells have always treated my mom and I like family, and she echoes the statement.

Other than Oakley’s little outburst, it's a picture-perfect holiday.

And really is it a family holiday without some sort of drama anyway?