Page 33 of A Wreck, You Make Me (Bad Boys of Bardstown #3)

“I could see it.” He leans closer, digging his belt buckle into my tummy. “I could sense it.”

Yeah, I bet he could. He’s my mind reader, isn’t he? I cup his face and say, “But Shepard?—”

“You shouldn’t have stopped me. You…” He takes in a deep growling breath. “I need to go back out there. I need?—”

“No, you don’t,” I tell him, squeezing my limbs around him tightly. “Stay here. With me.”

He looks at me angrily. Like he doesn’t like it. He doesn’t like that I’m making him do this, stopping him from whatever hell he’s planning on unleashing on those three idiots. But I don’t care. I don’t care if he hates it. I want him here. I need him here. So I keep holding on.

“Did he touch you somewhere else?” he asks then.

I shake my head, urgently. “No. No, he didn’t.”

“You sure about that?” But he doesn’t give me a chance to either confirm or deny, as he keeps going, “Because if he did, if he got his hands anywhere else, I’ll?—”

“No, Shepard, listen to me,” I say, my heart pounding urgently, my heels digging into the back of his thigh. “You arrived way before anything worse could’ve happened, okay? And you stopped it. You saved me.” Then, “You’re the only one who ever did.”

He is. From getting my pervy boss fired all those months ago to arranging my shoes in the closet in the middle of the night.

From giving money to someone so they’d stop calling me a bitch to wanting to take care of my debt.

He’s done so many big and small things for me.

And he’s the only one who’s ever done that.

I’ve had to protect myself, and my sister too, for so long from the world filled with assholes that I didn’t even think anyone else could share that job with me.

I didn’t even know what it would feel like if someone did.

I didn’t know it felt like this: cherished and light.

They say being strong is good, but what they don’t tell you is being strong is also fucking exhausting.

Being a big sister is wonderful, but there are no breaks, except the ones he has given me.

So yeah, this feels like walking on clouds.

This feels like being carried through a field of flowers and into the sunset.

Although right now, everything is so heavy and drenched in so many emotions, it’s like I’m going to burst.

With my need for him.

So before that happens, I continue, “So that was it. What you saw. I promise you. Just trust me, please .”

Something flickers through his features then, something I don’t understand but something unmistakable.

And his fingers on my body freeze. He himself freezes for a few seconds, his massive chest feeling like a slab of stone.

His thighs feeling like dense tree trunks.

I’m about to ask him what’s wrong when he comes back to life, his hands start up their push and pull, kneading my flesh, fisting my hair.

And his eyes, pretty and pitch-black right now even though I know there’s a hidden pool of chocolate in them, stare down at me with a certain intent.

Then, “Well, it’s not really his fault now, is it? Something about you drives men crazy.”

I swallow, winding my arms around his neck and giving him a squeeze. “I don’t care about other men.”

“No?”

“No, just you,” I confess and nothing I’ve ever said or will ever say can be truer. I may be lying to him about other things, but this one thing is and always will be true.

“Is that right?”

I pull at his hair then, because before everything happened, I had other concerns. “You’re late.”

He squeezes my waist. “That I am.”

“You’re never late,” I tell him like he doesn’t know.

His mouth tips up on one side. “Why, were you worried about me?”

I swallow. “Yes. I thought…”

“You thought what?”

I squeeze my limbs around him once again, crushing our bodies together. “I thought something happened to you.”

His chest moves with a breath as he takes in my features, and for the first time ever I don’t care about my flushed skin or my million freckles. I know he’s going to count them for me like he said he would. And if anyone can do it, it’s my toxic stepbrother.

“Nothing could’ve kept me away from you tonight,” he rasps, pushing his body into me even more, causing his belt buckle to dig into my flesh. “Nothing will keep me away from you tonight.”

My belly quivers at his tone. So possessive.

Has he ever sounded this possessive before?

I don’t think so. I think more than possessive, he sounds unhinged.

He sounds like his sanity is hanging by a thread.

He looks like that too. His cheeks are flushed, his breaths wild.

He looks like he won’t give me a choice tonight.

Like I can’t say no to whatever he’s got planned.

He won’t let me. And God, that makes me so wet.

So, so wet that I can feel my panties sticking to my core. But it also scares me.

Because what if it’s not how he pictured it would be? And in my inexperience and haste, I choose to focus on fear. “W-we have to wait.”

He studies me a beat. Then, “Why?”

“Because I’m on my shift,” I reply, feeling a tinge of disappointment, despite my nerves, that there’s still a few more hours left before we can do what we were always going to.

He lets a moment pass before he slowly shakes his head. “No, you’re not.”

“What?”

“You don’t work here anymore.”

My heart thuds. “I don’t…”

“The reason I was late,” he explains then, his voice low and tight, “and the reason those motherfuckers could fuck with you out there was because I talked to your asshole boss. Made sure he knew you were mine.”

“You talked to G-George?”

“Told him if he puts you to work again, he’ll have me to answer to,” he finishes.

“And before what happened just now, if he’d made the mistake of hiring you back, I would’ve given him a chance to talk before I would’ve beaten the shit out of him.

Now though”—he moves his jaw back and forth—“I’ll just break all his bones the moment he opens his mouth. ”

“But—”

“Do you understand what I’m saying to you?

You’re not”—he emphasizes his words by pulling my head back and digging the pads of his fingers into my bare waist—“going to set foot in this hellhole after tonight. Is that clear? I’ve had enough of men drooling over you like a piece of meat and you being absolutely clueless about it. ”

I swallow, my back arched, my heart pounding in my chest.

I was going to talk to George after my shift, and if I’m being honest, I wasn’t particularly looking forward to it.

While he’s been an okay boss, I know he’d be pissed if I told him I was going to quit without giving notice.

He doesn’t like when his Muses quit with two weeks’ notice, let alone with none.

And I still hadn’t figured out how to convince him to let me go.

So Shepard handling it for me is so extremely helpful that my shoulders sag in relief.

“T-thank you.” And for some reason, I feel compelled to explain, “I mean, I wasn’t really looking forward to talking to him about quitting.

I knew he wasn’t going to be happy about it.

And well… I never really thanked you for all the things you’ve done, all the things you do , big and small.

Even the way you want to help me with my…

debt. And it still feels,” I sigh, “strange but I’ve decided if it helps my sister then I should embrace it. I should…”

God, I have no idea why I’m telling him all this. Although it’s the truth. I’m still not okay with the money part but I’m going to use it to help Snow go to college. And I’ll think of it as him helping his half-sister. Without his knowledge, of course.

Anyway, maybe I’m saying all this because this is such a big moment for me. For my life. I’m going to have sex. For the first time. With the only man who’s ever made me feel safe and while I can’t tell him other truthful things, maybe I can tell him this.

“And I… I’ve never really felt safe in my life. Or cared for. Or even that I’m worth caring for. But I feel safe with you. When you’re around, I know nothing can touch me. Nothing bad. You won’t let it. So I truly am. Thankful.”

His jaw is ticking but I don’t know what it means.

Maybe it’s too emotional for him, given how he wants nothing to do with emotions.

But whatever. I’m glad I said my piece. Besides, money isn’t the only thing he’s giving me.

He’s also promised to talk so he’s going to have to get used to this mushiness.

But my thoughts break when he promises, or more like threatens, in a low tone, “Well, tonight’s your lucky night then. Because you’ll have a chance to show how much.”

I squeeze my legs around him again as I whisper, “I’m scared.”

“I know.”

“You d-do?”

“Yeah.”

“How?”

His grips in my hair and on my body flex. “Your thighs are shaking.”

I realize he’s right and I tighten my muscles to stop it. “I?—”

“And that vein on your neck,” he goes on, pulling my head back and to the side as if to emphasize his point.

“The one that flutters like crazy when I’m close and the one that tempts me with every breath you take, to take a bite out of you and leave you with a necklace of bruises, is throbbing faster than I’ve ever seen it. ”

“It’s just that?—”

“And I’d like to take credit for it, but I don’t think it’s all me, is it?”

“I’m a virgin,” I blurt out.

His eyes flash with what I can only call a predatory glint and my heart drops to the bottom of my stomach. He leans over me like a dark shadow as he drawls, “Yeah?”

I nod jerkily, or try to, but his fingers in my hair are relentless. “I-I mean, you know that already?—”

“I do.”

“Right. So I-I came prepared,” I tell him.

“Prepared.”

“For tonight.”

“Tell me.”

I swallow. “I… I brought an overnight bag.”

“What’s in the overnight bag?”

“Toothbrush.”

“What else?”

“Moisturizer.”

“Good skin is important.”

“Some clothes and?—”

He digs his fingers in my waist. “You’re not going to need any.”