Page 76 of A Cock and Bull Story

Jack pulls into student parking just as Elise and Sian text that they’ve arrived.

“I told them to meet us here,” Arthur mumbles. “If they can even find us in the melee.”

“Well, we don’t have time to waste. We need to get our diversion on and get my passport—wait, what about you guys? Do you have your passports?!”

“We’ll sneak onto the plane as our animals; don’t worry about us,” Theo soothes.

How the fuck is a fish going to sneak onto a plane?!

“I feel like there’s a fatal flaw in your plan, but baby steps. One thing at a time. Time for Operation Campus Streaking.”

“I’m not completely on board with this plan,” Jude says unenthusiastically. “How about I quickly go scope things out as a cockchafer?”

“What if the bad guys are waiting at my apartment, though?”

“I will smell—fuck, no I won’t. I forgot that for some reason we can’t smell those bastards anymore.”

A lightbulb goes off in my head.

“Dr. Fuckface—the scientist who used an experimental drug on me—said he found a way to mask shifters’ scents!”

All the guys start talking at one.

“Dr. Fuckface?”

“An experimental drug?!”

“They can mask our scents?!”

“Motherfucker!”

I laugh. Of course, Theo is confused by my name for the evil scientist. Jude and Arthur ask the important questions, and Jack—he gets it all and just sums it up in that one perfect word.

“And—Dean Hardwickknowsabout you guys.”

“How so?” Jude prompts.

“He knows that you’re Primaries.”

“Interesting,” Arthur hums.

God, he’s weird.

“Ok, being here is not safe—who knows where the dean or that boffin1are. I’m going to get your passport and we’re going to get out of here as fast as we can—but I don’t want you running around starkers. We need a different diversion.”

“Don’t worry, mate—I’ve got your back,” Jack grins. “I have the perfect diversion.”

Why do I feel like me streaking is the saner—and safer—option?

“Theo and Arthur—stay with Belle. Elise and Sian will be here soon. Hopefully, Sian’s cousin’s vehicle can fit us better than this dinky thing. I’ll return shortly. Jack—work your magic.”

With that, Jude strips and shifts.

I swear to God I’ll never get used to this man taking off his clothes—and turning into a freaking bug.

Jack follows suit. It’s amazing how quickly he transforms—in the blink of an eye. I kind of want to film him and watch it happen in slow motion. The donkey brays at me, and I smack his ass while laughing at the irony.

“Get going, diversion,” I joke. “Operation Asstastic is now in motion!”