Page 14

Chapter 14

Ambrose

A shiver of emotion tickled at the edge of my awareness, but I smiled softly to myself and ignored it. It wasn’t the sort of energy I devoured. If I had to guess, I’d say the absolutely unappetizing (but lovely) bursts of excitement and euphoria I sensed were coming from Andy and River. It was about time someone welcomed that sexy cat into our family the right way.

And I wouldn’t be the least bit surprised if Zhong was with them. The gargoyle had been poorly disguising his little crush for weeks now.

I dismissed that fun thought and focused on the tantalizing, and much more appetizing, energetic “aroma” that called to me from elsewhere in the mansion.

I reached the door to the courtyard and saw that Dyre and Elijah were still out there practicing something to do with their linked magics. I paused near the threshold, sinking into the shadows so I wouldn’t be seen as I spied on my chillingly gorgeous redheaded lover and his handsome angel. My first impulse had been to assume the darkness calling to my boogeyman nature was coming from Dyre—or more accurately, Sunny. But no. My necromancer was relaxed and at ease, a rare smile gracing his features as he shook his head at something Elijah said.

Ah, they were perfect for each other. And they needed this time alone to get comfortable with the new bond between them. I had no interest in interfering. Though I did linger long enough to watch them both become distracted and forget about whatever spell they were working on long enough to share a sweet kiss.

Be still my little black heart.

Still smiling, I left the sweet scene behind and wandered deeper into the mansion. My happiness turned slightly bittersweet as I thought how much Hasumi would have enjoyed seeing Dyre and Elijah together, laughing and happy as the two of them rarely ever were. The water elemental had wanted nothing more than for all of us here to feel loved and accepted. Hasumi had been plotting about turning us all into a family from nearly day one.

I found Niamh and Hibiscus in one of the lesser-used parlors, where Bis had set up his own gaudy little nest of a bedroom. His “collections” decorated every spare shelf and horizontal surface. There was a shelf of various sized pinecones. One containing a bunch of rocks that called to him for whatever reason. Dried flowers. Little paper hats Zhong had folded for him during stretches of extreme boredom. A set of small antlers that had once belonged to Niamh (and how she had surprised us all when they fell off and new ones grew in!) A pile of old jewelry he’d found here and there throughout the Lovell place. The little rodent person collected anything and everything that caught his fancy.

It sounded like he and Niamh were currently discussing their plans to convince Andy to let Bis carry weapons and accompany us if we ever went back into the other realms to help the resistance. All the gods and goddesses help them when they brought that idea to our witch. But they seemed content, so I left them to it.

Trailing my finger along the banister of the small back servants’ stair, I sighed. In truth, I think I’d known all along the source of the fear, sadness, and despair that shivered over my awareness like a tempting lover’s caress, like a feast for the hunger inside me. I had just hoped it would fade so I wouldn’t feel so compelled to help.

I might be a scary looking nightmare made of shadows, who fed off terror and bad dreams, but even I had things that scared me.

I closed my eyes and felt the delicious pull of dejection and crawling anxiety. No, it wasn’t fading. If anything, it was getting stronger, calling to me, demanding that I go find it and feast.

“Hasumi,” I said softly to the empty air around me. “Wherever you’ve gone in whatever afterlife awaits us, I hope you can hear me. You owe me for this. I expect some sort of divine cosmic miracle as a reward for my sacrifice.”

I could almost hear the water weaver’s musical laughter as I headed up the stairs.

The waves of delicious darkness lured me up to the third floor. The only room that was really in use up here was River’s bedroom, but the energy wasn’t coming from there. I let some of the despair sink into my aura, sipping at it like a fine wine as I slowly made my way down the hallway. I could dematerialize and arrive in an instant, but if we were being honest, I was putting off the inevitable.

Or savoring it. Yes. Let’s go with that. I was simply taking my time to savor the richness of my meal. That was all it was.

I studied the beautiful but cold faces in the family portraits I passed, probably lesser witches or relatives the Lovells weren’t particularly fond of, since they were hidden all the way up here on the third floor.

Strange, how witches and other humanoid creatures put so much stock in lineages and such. I had no idea how I came into being. Did I have a mother? A father? Or had I simply spawned from the shadows, the way elementals arose from their elements? I had no memory of ever being anything other than what I was now—fully grown and complete.

It hardly mattered. Now that I understood all the fuss about having a family, I was certain the one I had found here was far superior to any my birth might have shackled me with.

Which was why I needed to hurry up and get on with it. “Stop dawdling, Ambrose,” I muttered to myself. “How have you suddenly become such a coward?”

“And why the fuck are you lurking in the shadows talking to yourself?” A smooth voice added, somehow managing to sound both sensual and unimpressed.

I sighed and turned toward the mostly closed door on the opposite side of the hallway. “Oh, there you are!” I said with as much fake enthusiasm as I could muster. “Just who I was looking for.”

Pushing the door open, I leaned against the doorframe to regard the tiny jinn who was currently sitting on the floor in the corner of the room. I knew he was petite. But he seemed so much smaller now, lacking the fire and force of personality that usually made him seem much bigger. His posture looked casual, with one knee drawn up and an arm resting loosely on top. But I could sense emotions—at least some of them. And he was positively leaking things I wanted to lap up like a cat presented with a nice warm saucer of milk. I knew my eyes were probably glowing. I couldn’t help it. Aahil was old and powerful to begin with, and the hardship and trauma he had endured had made him into a veritable feast for a creature like myself.

“What do you want?” he demanded, lifting his chin a notch to glare at me with those dark-lashed, honey-gold eyes.

I slowly started to walk toward him, drawn that way without even thinking about it. Flames sparked to life along the fingers of the hand that dangled over his knee, and I paused. Oh, right. This was Aahil we were talking about here, not my dinner.

I crossed my arms and looked down at the beautiful terror. He was all bundled up in oversized “peasant” clothes, as he called the sweatshirt and joggers he currently wore. But it didn’t do much to detract from his looks. Fire jinn were a literal incarnation of seductive fire energy, of sex and passion, after all. I didn’t think there was anything that would ever make Aahil look less than delicious. But even though it did nothing to hide his nature, I knew the outfit was a form of armor for him. He’d worn nothing but that for a long time after we retrieved him from the fucking O’Leary coven. They had nearly destroyed the man. The fucking bastards.

Ignoring the implied threat of his fire, I walked over to him and sank down to hold up the wall on the other side of him, crossing my legs, my elbows on my knees so I could rest my face in my hands. “What are you doing all the way up here?” I asked casually. As if we were just… hanging out. I glanced meaningfully around the dark, dusty room, then back at the jinn. “Doesn’t seem nearly shiny or luxurious enough for a bratty prince like you.”

He scoffed. The flames on his hand formed into a small ball, and he rolled it over his graceful fingers and back like a performer doing magic tricks. “A prince, now am I? Good to see you acknowledge my general superiority, boogeyman. You may be just a touch less dull than I thought.”

I chuckled and straightened to put a hand to my chest. “Compliments! From the Brat Prince of Snide? I feel so honored by your faint praises, your majesty.”

He narrowed his eyes at me, and the corners of his sensuous lips tensed, either with displeasure or because he was fighting the urge to do the unspeakable and laugh at my absurdity. “Go away,” he said flatly.

I sighed. “Aahil. I know you’re suffering. I could sense it all the way on the other side of this nightmare-filled monstrosity of a house.”

He flicked his fingers, launching the little ball of fire at the far wall, where it burst into a shower of sparks and disappeared. “And?” he drawled, as if I was the most uninteresting bug to ever crawl across his path.

“Why?” I muttered to myself. “Why do they all find this so damned attractive?”

“What are you nattering on about now, abomination?” Aahil demanded. “I didn’t come up here to listen to shadows yammer nonsense.”

I shook my head. “I was just wondering why everyone puts up with your bratty attitude. I mean, don’t get me wrong, you’re beautiful and all. I can be a bit of a pill myself. And I like a little brat taming now and then. But you make me want to wring your little neck in far less pleasant ways.”

He stared at me blankly for a beat, then his lips quirked up into a sly smile that might have been wickedly teasing… if it wasn’t so venomous. “Try it.”

I let out a surprised bark of laughter. “No thank you,” I managed, wiping at the tears in the corners of my eyes before gesturing at myself. “I might be all dark and spooky, but I’m not a masochist. Being set on fire doesn’t really appeal.”

He didn’t even so much as crack a smile. “Then why. Are. You. Here?” he said between clenched teeth, showing me his cute little fangs.

I shrugged. “I could feel the darkness in you. It’s been a while since I had a filling snack.”

He rolled his eyes at me. “You’ve been feeding off all the other saps in this damned house for days. You’re hardly starving.”

I leaned my head back against the wall and rested my hands in my lap as I stared at the intricately detailed ceiling. “You’re right. I’m not in any danger of starvation,” I admitted. “But I think you might be in danger of snuffing out the last bit of your own spark, little flame.”

He tensed at my use of Hasumi’s nickname for him. “Fuck you.”

“Mmm,” I said easily. “Yes, yes. Bitchy jinn. Very dangerous. So scary. I’m going to start siphoning off some of that darkness for you now, okay?”

I could almost hear his teeth grinding together. But he didn’t actually object. So I opened up my aura, just a little bit more, drawing in some of the dark, heavy emotional energy that surrounded him.

“I hate that you can do that,” he said after a time, his voice nearly a whisper.

“I know,” I replied in the same soft tone. It was too much like what Hasumi had done for him.

But instead of feeding him lighter, more positive emotions, the way Hasumi would have, I was simply devouring the dark ones. Hasumi and I had worked really well in tandem. I kind of felt like I was missing my other half in times like this. It was a weird sensation for someone who had never relied on anyone before all this.

Which, I realized, was probably a big part of what Aahil was feeling as well. The jinn had hated that he had to rely on Hasumi to keep him in check when his powers and his emotions were too much for him. But he had come to trust in Hasumi. He had actually liked the water weaver. Maybe loved them. Having to suddenly manage it all alone must be painful. And allowing someone like me to see and ease his struggles instead—someone he had a lukewarm relationship with at best… it had to be awful.

“I don’t hate you, Aahil,” I told him truthfully, daring a glance to the side as I continued to siphon off the worst of the darkness surrounding him. “I know I’m not your favorite person in the world. But I do want to help.”

He let his head thunk back against the wall, then rolled it to the side so his glowing gold eyes met mine. “I know.”

I thought that was all he was going to say. And that was fine. It was enough. At least he was letting me take away some of his pain. Maybe it would be enough to keep him from wanting to hurt himself.

I was surprised when he spoke into the silence that stretched between us. “I don’t actually hate you either. Surprisingly.” Another pause. “I’m trying,” he said haltingly. “Or, I was trying. To stop pushing everyone away. To stop… being so me, I suppose.”

He looked down, his dark, red-streaked hair falling forward to hide his face, clearly mortified by his own words. “Idiot,” he muttered. “Forget I said that. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

I braced myself and did possibly the most dangerous thing I’d done in quite some time. I scooted closer and placed my hand on his knee. “What’s wrong with you is that you just lost your lover. Your friend. And one of your biggest sources of stability and safety. Aahil, why are you hiding up here when you should be downstairs being comforted by Andy, or Zong, or… literally any of the others who are so good at loving you?”

He shook his head, his long hair still hiding his face. “Because I’m afraid, Ambrose,” he whispered, so faint I could barely make out the words. “Fucking afraid.”

“I can taste that,” I said lightly, attempting to ease his discomfort. “It’s quite delicious. But what is it you’re afraid of?”

He closed his eyes. “I’m afraid that without Hasumi, I’ll go back to how I was before,” he admitted slowly. Hesitantly. As if he really was making a concerted effort to open up to me. Astounding, given this was Aahil . “I’m afraid I’ll loose myself again, and this time I won’t be able to find my way back. I’m afraid I’ll be fine one second, and the next I’ll lose control of the fire and burn down everything and everyone I’ve come to care about.”

Oh. Well, of course.

“You won’t,” I said evenly.

He finally opened his eyes and lifted his head, fire sparking in the depths of his glowing eyes. “And you’re so sure of that? So sure you’re willing to risk them all? Jinn fire is nearly unstoppable when it’s truly unleashed. Would you see me burn them all to ash? Would you live with the sounds of Oleander’s dying screams echoing in your ears for eternity? Or your necromancer? I’d rather wither away and die up here alone than… than… ever hurt anyone against my will ever again.”

“Oh, jinn,” I said on an exhale, drinking even deeper from the well of pain and fear he was wallowing in, unspooling it and pulling it inside me where it was transmuted into power and vitality. Without thinking, I slipped an arm around his shoulders and pulled him in against my side.

I was shocked when he allowed it. Even more stunned when he actually leaned into me, relaxing against my side with a little sigh that said he’d been longing for someone to hold him. Maybe for someone to keep him together, now that he feared falling apart again.

“It’s okay,” I said, letting my shadows envelop us, hiding the jinn’s embarrassing vulnerability from the world. “I’ve got you.”

And I rested my cheek against his silky soft head as the fiery little jinn sobbed his broken heart out.