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“Carter, don’t spiral. One day at a time.”

“Do you?”

“Honestly? I don’t. Not after the childhood I had. I want to travel and write. If you want them though?—”

I kiss him. Not giving one single shit that we’re standing in the middle of a lupine field a hundred feet from my family. I kiss him because he’s the one person on earth who was made just for me. Maybe fate and soulmates really are real.

Loud whistles hoot behind us and I release Finn’s mouth, both of us laughing. I take a deep breath, calming down. This really is going to work. We’re going to be okay.

CHAPTER 22

finn

Carter’s familyis everything a big family should be, and it’s hard not to hold out hope that I can be one of them someday. Amy’s eyes are focused solely on us, a serene smile on her face as she watches the exchange between us, and I feel my face heat. Carter takes my hand, leading me back up to his family.

“I’ve never seen you so comfortable in your own skin, my boy, so happy and at ease. I’m so happy for you.”

Carter beams at his mom like he needed to hear those words as much as I did.

“We should probably tell you both what happened.” Everyone is off doing their own thing, so Carter and I take a seat in two of the patio chairs next to his parents.

“I was in a relationship with your father, Finn. For a little over a year in college. Carter, your dad was my best friend—always had been. But he was in a relationship with Samantha Harkin, and that was a whole thing. But even though we always felt something for each other, the time was justnever right for us. Finn, it’s not a secret that your father comes from money, and with that money comes a certain level of expectation that his father put on him, and I’m assuming that has trickled down to you.”

“It has.”

“Well, your dad was destined for big things in the city, and I was destined for a small life here in Aspen Ridge. I wanted a husband who put me at the center of his world, a big family with tons of kids and chaos, and to live in a tiny town where everyone knows everyone. Your dad wanted a trophy wife to throw money at in his penthouse in the city. Our life aspirations didn’t align. I cared about him, Finn, deeply at the time because I saw a side of him that clearly no longer exists. He was kind, and I know he loved me. When I realized that we would never work long-term, that he would never leave the life he had planned out in front of him, I broke up with him. Only to have the stars align and immediately start a relationship with Craig. I got pregnant with the twins not long after that. Your dad was irate. He accused Craig of taking me from him and spent months trying to get me to reconsider. He was adamant that I was stolen from him, as if I was a piece of property that could be controlled. He stalked me, stalked us, and in order to protect me and my unborn babies, I was forced to get a restraining order against him, which I’m sure did not go well for him with his family’s status. It’s been over thirty years. And based on your age, I’m assuming you came not long after my twin boys did.”

“I found out recently that I was a surprise baby and was not wanted by my dad. It sounded like my mom willingly got herself pregnant with a Nash’s baby to secure her position in life.”

“I’m sorry, sweetie. And I’m sorry that something thatshould have been put to rest thirty years ago caused you and Carter so much harm.”

“I don’t know what to say. I had no idea you were such a heartbreaker, Mom,” Carter says, trying to make light of the situation.

“It’s probably anticlimactic to you both, I’m sure you were expecting a huge scandal.”

“No, just really wanted to know the reason he hated you all so badly, that he wanted me to stay away, but that tracks. My dad holds deep grudges. He’s a very angry man, and that’s the only version of him I know. I don’t have a single tender memory,” I confess.

Carter reaches over and squeezes my hand lovingly and confidently, grounding me.

“I’m going to help you make them; we’re going to be just fine,” he promises.

“You’ve decided to no longer have a relationship with him?” Carter’s dad, Craig, asks.

“Correct. Since the moment I was born, I was expected to be a mini version of him, expected to comply, never ask questions. I fell in love with writing, with being a travel writer, especially, and he knew it. He knew I had found something that he could hold over my head to keep me in line, and up until I met Carter, it worked. Your son gave me the strength to live my life how I want to, to break the cycle my dad was trying to continue. It’s funny, though. You left him because you wanted a quiet, peaceful life surrounded by family in a small town, and that’s all I want, too. It’s all I’ve wanted for as long as I can remember. That and writing.”

“I’m proud of you. Of both you boys,” Amy tells us. “I’m sad that your dad’s life is full of hatred. I hope he can find peace someday.” I nod my head in agreement.

The rest of the evening goes by in a wild blur. Carterwasn’t kidding when he said that his family is pure chaos. It’s loud and obnoxious, but it’s amazing. Each one of them is so full of life and so happy, and I desperately want to be accepted into the fold.

“Hey, you gotta few to chat?” Sawyer says to me, towering over me from where I’m sitting on a patio chair.

“Yeah, man. Lead the way.”

Carter visibly stiffens next to me, his hands clenching into fists as if he’s ready to brawl his older brother on my behalf right now. I nod to him, letting him know that I’m okay, and follow Sawyer into the house.

“This where you kill me?” I ask with a smile, trying to ease some of the tension.

“Nah. I’d do it where everyone could watch to serve as a warning.” Something in me tells me that he’s not joking, and I have to actively work hard not to bristle.