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“You came all this way to tell me that? That’s what you have for me?”

Fuck.

“I wanted to be a man and apologize to your face.”

“Your apologies are worthless until your actions prove otherwise. Are you cutting ties with that pig?”

I dig my nails into the flesh of my thighs through my slacks at his insult.

“I already have. We aren’t speaking. Can you explain to me why you hate them so much? If I could just understand.”

His jaw tics, anger rising, but I need to understand.

“I told you, Griffin. It’s none of your goddamn business. Now stay away from them, focus on Lexi, and maybe I’ll reconsider having your ass replaced with Dion.”

I exhale a defeated breath, but I agree.

“I understand, Dad.”

“If you’re lying to me, Griffin, just to save face, I will find out. Don’t fuck with me. Last chance, or you’re on your own.”

I nod my agreement. “I understand. Thank you.”

With bile rising up my throat, I leave my dad’s office feeling like a slimy piece of shit for playing his sick fucking game, but the last thing I need is for him to ruin my name by blasting me publicly and bringing Carter into that. I need to protect him at all costs, and I don’t trust my dad not to put me in front of his firing squad and let Carter go down in the crossfire. Once I’m in my car, I pull out my phone and text Trey an update.

Me: Omw back. He seemed to accept my apology and I still have my job right now. If we’re gonna find something on my dad, we gotta do it now.

Trey: We’re going to figure it out. He’ll slip up somewhere and we’ll find it

Trey: Youdoin okay?

Am I? I don’t really know. I’m going through the motions to get shit done, but I don’t think I’m okay. Not really.

Me: I’ll get there, just not today

Trey: You’ve got me

Me: I appreciate you

Trey: Up for company tonight?

Me: Sure

Trey: I’ll bring the pizza

Me: Hitting the road, I’ll see you later

With that, I start the long-ass drive out of the city and back into the mountains with Carter on my mind the entire way. I kissed my dad’s ass to buy me more time, to get something together to get us out of this damn position. Whether or not Carter and I end up together, I’m still always going to do the right thing. I didn’t think I’d ever be in a position where I needed to choose between the love of my career and the love of my life, but here I am, and it’s no competition. I just need to make sure that when I go down and lose the job I’ve dedicated my life to, it doesn’t negatively impact Carter, and I’ve got myself set up ahead of time. I need a game plan. Which means I need time.

CHAPTER 13

carter

Sleep eludes me.Food is tasteless. My drive is gone. This is exactly what I didn’t fucking want. I never wanted to be so wrapped up in another person that they had the power to destroy me. I’m a shell of the person I was before Griffin Nash walked into my life uninvited and flipped the entire fucking thing off its axis.

This is why I stick to transactional, emotionless sex. Finn’s words ring in my head, “lean in,”churning the bile around in my stomach. How could I have let myself lean into those moments with him? My walls were taken down for the first time in my life, and I’m stunned stupid I thought even for a moment I was falling for him. Was I that caught up in everything?

I should be panicking, I should be angry. But all I feel is the bitter sting of regret. Regret over letting myself fall into Finn’s clutches so easily. Regret over being so goddamn weak when it comes to him, regret for falling for him. Because that’s what happened, isn’t it? I don’t do feelings, and this is why. I can’t believe I didn’t fight it harder. I was stupid tothink for even a moment that I could give him parts of me without falling for him. Fucking stupid.