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I laugh. “Are you saying I stink?”
“No. I’m saying I need a shower and I don’t want to shower alone.” He rolls off the bed, and I watch his lean, naked body as he moves toward his bathroom. He waits at the door, smiling back at me. “Join me?”
I’m going to tell him.
In the morning. Shower first.
Come on. You knew it was coming down to this at some point.
BARRON
“Can we make Christmas cookies?” Camdyn asks, looking from me to Kacy as she kicks at the snow.
Clumps of it hit my boots as I gaze down at her. “Sure.”
“Kacy.” Camdyn reaches for her hands, swinging them around. “You want to help us?”
“I’d love to,” Kacy gushes, smiling as if she’s never been asked to make anything with a child. Which isn’t true. Yesterday, Sev and she made a witch's hat out of newspaper and then spray-painted it black. Sev hasn’t taken it off since.
I lean my shoulder into Kacy’s as we walk, the frozen snow crunching beneath our feet. It catches her attention, and she looks over at me, a gentle smile on her lips. “They love having you here for Christmas,” I tell her.
“I love being here. I’ve never had a real family Christmas. I can’t wait to do all the things. Cookies, wrapping presents, singing Christmas carols. I’m literally so excited.”
“You’ve never had a Christmas with your family?” I ask, my breath coming out with a cloud into the frigid air.
The wind blows Kacy’s hair into her face, and she fights with turning her head away from it to keep it out of her eyes. “No. Not really. Not like what I imagine it to be. Snowy morning with hot chocolate and kids opening presents. Big Christmas dinner with laughter, egg nog, and both parents there, not fighting. No dad showing up shit-faced with a chick he met the night before and calling her a friend and knowing damn well he boned her. No mom telling you to be grateful you have such nice things when she gives you a car for Christmas when all you wanted was her to love you.” She blinks, tears forming. “You would think having parents who could afford anything you wanted would be perfect growing up, but I was only ever filled with disappointment because they never saw what I really wanted. Them. To notice me.”
I stare over at her, the girls’ laughter filling the silence in the distance. “You know nobodies’ Christmas is perfect, right?” I try to ease some humor into my words, fearing she’s going to start crying if I don’t. “I mean, Morgan… we know this Christmas isn’t gonna be perfect.”
She stifles her laughter with her gloved hand, and if perfection did exist, it resides in this moment, with flushed cheeks, a smile, and blue eyes. I don’t know where this is going, but with her, I’m willing to find out.
Kacy’s eyes drift to the girls. “I know it won’t be perfect, especially if Morgan gets a hold of the tequila, but this is perfect. Here. With you guys. And it starts with baking cookies with two little girls. I’m going to make every Christmas cookie imaginable.”
I pull her into my side, wrapping my arm around her shoulder. “You’re something else, Darlin’.”
“That’s a good thing, right?”
I press my lips to her temple. “A very good thing.” We haven’t talked about where this is leading or what comes after Christmas. I don’t even want to think about her leaving.
“It’s so beautiful here,” Kacy says, trudging through the snow beside me, the girls ahead of us a few steps. We took a walk around the ranch. The girls wanted to show her where they go swimming in the summer, and that turned into them hunting for a lost spell in the trees. Okay, Sev is hunting for a nonexistent spell, and Camdyn is going along with it for now. I have to admit, since Kacy has been here, Camdyn’s been a lot nicer to Sev. I’ve only had to separate one fight this week.
Without much thought, I take Kacy’s hand in mine, fully aware this is the first time I’ve held it. “Spring is beautiful,” I hedge, curious what she’ll say. “Summers are hot and unbearable.”
Worry etches in her face, her eyes darting to the kids. “I… need talk to you about something.”
My heart beats a little faster. “About leaving?”
“No. It’s just that, well, I don’t know… we should talk. Alone.”
I panic. “Kacy, if this is about you staying here for Christmas… I want you here. They want you here.”
“No, about you—”
“Daddy?” Camdyn yells. “Who’s that?”
I glance over my shoulder to see what she’s pointing at. That’s when I see a familiar Chevy truck. Johnny’s truck. Only he’s not the one standing outside of it. Fuck. Why the hell would she show up here?
“Goddamn it, Tara,” I grumble, feeling like my heart is going to beat out of my chest. I drop my arm from around Kacy and face her. She’s pale, her eyes wide in fear, panic… I don’t know, but I can’t place it. It’s as if she’s seeing a ghost. “Can you take my girls inside?” I ask, handing her Camdyn’s jacket she stripped off and tossed at me.