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“Because if he can draw your powers out by siphoning, he can help you understand what kind of powers you have and help you to draw on them better,” Nyx said, not unkindly, but it all made me feel like more of a failure.

Rakan grunted a greeting and gestured for me to come and stand before him. I did so, even though my whole body wanted to do anything else. He eyed me, intense and stern in his assessment, his scrutiny pulling his gaze tight. I stilled, fighting the uncomfortable stare as he began to circle me. I waited, half expecting him to lift and examine my feet one at a time and then return to inspect my teeth.

When he finally completed his circle and faced me again, he frowned. “No aura,” was all he said.

What did that mean?

“Let him work, Sol,” Nyx said through the bond. He sounded hopeful, as if this process was the key to unlocking my so-called magic and I should just trust this bizarre process.

I didn’t want to have magic. I didn’t have any, so why did disappointment cling to me like damp clothes? I couldn’t get away from it. The way Nyx looked at me… I could see it in his eyes. I was letting everyone down, and I hated the feeling.

Rakan waved Nyx forward and positioned him in front of me, then he placed my hands in Nyx’s.

“Okay,” he said, setting his palm across my forehead. “Begin.”

“Wait!” I cried out loudly—louder than I intended—and pulled my hands out of Nyx’s. “Begin what, exactly? You haven’t said what I have to do.”

Rakan muttered something about the Goddess. “You do nothing for now.” He pointed to Nyx. “He will call to your power. Draw it out.”

He set about repositioning us into the hold again, and I tried to calm myself, but it wasn’t easy. I was way too on edge, and this wasn’t helping.

“Breathe,” Nyx soothed through the bond, but it did nothing to calm me.

“How can I when I have no idea what’s happening? Is it too much to ask to be told what’s going on? What is expected? And stay out of my head. There’s too much happening to build one of your dams right now.”

Nyx smirked but switched to speaking aloud. “I am going to try calling to your power. Rakan will work to draw out any power that answers my call. All you have to do is open yourself.”

“And how, by the Goddess, do I do that?” I asked them, glaring at Nyx. “Information! I need information,” I scolded privately down the bond.

“I thought I was to stay out of your head?” His satisfied smile was going to turn me violent.

“Just tell me what I need to know,” I demanded.

Aloud, he told me, “It’s the opposite of what I showed you yesterday. Let it flow. Don’t hold it back.”

“Let what flow?”

“Everything. You, your essence. Hold nothing back.”

Rakan’s hand touched my forehead again. “Begin.”

SIXTEEN

NYX

“This isn’t working.” I broke off from the contact and thrust a hand into my hair, my temper spiking. We’d been at this for days with Rakan to no avail, and we were all frustrated.

It was like she wasn’t even trying at all.

No matter what Rakan attempted, Zaria seemed immune. He could not draw a single ounce of power out of her, and if a serpentine flyer with the strongest siphoning powers in the kingdom couldn't draw something out of her—fear ate the inside of my chest raw. She couldn’t have no powers. It wasn’t possible. That’s not how things worked. Our powers had to be equal to meld.

Could her parents have permanently taken her powers from her? I hadn’t slept in days, going over and over it.

“Don’t act like this is my fault.” Zaria’s chest heaved like she’d just carried water up the side of a mountain.

“What do you feel?” Rakan asked her.

“Nothing. Nothing at all,”she huffed.