Page 83

to listen to music on a phone or the radio or whatever. It’s a

completely different experience in person. The music really

comes alive and even the most devout hater is often surprised.

Adley is enraptured by the music and I’m enraptured

by her. I guess that makes us a good pair. I can’t believe that

I’m here. In public. Not just sitting next to a beautiful, alluring

woman, but holding her hand. I’m not just thrilled by the fact

that this is out in the open. That I can be proud to sit here and

be who I am. That this is the first date I’ve been on in my

entire life that I truly, to the bottom of my soul, wanted to go

on. I feel more than just free.

I get all shivery at the music, but also whenever I turn

and watch the expressions on Adley’s face. She can be hard to

read, but not right now. Right now, she’s perfectly open. I love

the joy there. She really is as vibrant as the sun, as beautiful,

mysterious, and ever changing as a beam of light.

I feel so many things all at once. I’ve felt them ever

since the night at my house.

We drank our tea in almost silence, then Adley said she

had to go. I didn’t press her. She didn’t initiate anything else. I

wanted to kiss her again. I longed for it so badly that my

whole body hurt with trying to contain it, but I didn’t want to

hurt her, so I kept that to myself. I’m not sure if I would have

hurt her or scared her off.

She did give me a quick hug as she walked out the

door. By quick, I mean that I still took time to inhale her soft

scent. It stayed with me for hours after she left. I had to sit

down and think about it, but I decided it was fear that made

her stop. I don’t know how far we would have taken things.

My entire body was still buzzing and lit up from just that brief