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“You saw him in Nashville,” Mia adds, leaning across her friend to talk to me better. “That time was within the top times of the year in the country. He has a great shot at this.”

“And his lane placement is good.”

I glare at Bryce. “That’s what you said the other night.”

He’s looking at me over the top of Josie’s head. “You know I can’t predict what’s going to happen, but I have a good feeling about this, Kat. I wouldn’t lie to you about that.”

This really is Carter’s last chance to make the team, and Bryce is just as anxious about this as I am. Maybe more so. Obviously, I trust him, but what good does trust do in this situation? We all believe in Carter and trust his talent is good enough to pull him through, but what if someone else is quicker? Sure, up to six qualifiers can go to the Olympics in this event, but the field is out of eight. Of those six, only the top two will get spots in the actual event in Paris.

He doesn’t have to come in first tonight, I remind myself.He just needs to get a ticket to Paris.

I’m gripping Josie and Mia’s hands in mine as they announce the raise. I don’t break my gaze from his as he steps up to the blocks, ready for this last chance.

Take your mark . . .

ParisOlympics

July 2024

Everything I’ve worked on for the last dozen or so years has been leading up to this moment. Either I’m going to get an Olympic gold medal, or I’m not.

I, like so many other athletes, used to think the moment that mattered the most would be the first time I achieved my dream, but now I’m not so sure. My career, this sport, has allowed so many doors to open to me and has provided me with a stable foundation to step into who I want to be. I’ve achieved goals and dreams so far beyond my wildest imagination that even I have trouble reconciling them sometimes. I’d do it all again in a heartbeat.

But this—these last few seconds is what matters. The last few seconds that determine how it ends, the legacy that I’ll leave behind in this sport will either be shadowed or highlighted by this moment. How it all ends, I’ve learned, is just as important as how it started.

I push off the wall, feeling the burning sensation in my arms, legs, and lungs as I drive into the last fifty meters. Fifty meters. That’s all that’s left and I’m ready to fight for it.

The rest of the field fades away. I don’t check where any other swimmer is. I focus on my own race. I can hear the roar of the crowd in muffled bursts. Tomorrow, I know I’ll be feeling every second of this race deep in my bones, and will feel it for weeks to come, but I still push harder. It doesn’t matter because this is it. It’s the last time I’ll be doing this, the last time I will feel the burn in my lungs and the adrenaline pumping through me.

In just a few seconds, my life will be completely different.

I glide into the wall, hand punching against the touchpad to clock my final time. Back pressed up against the wall, the sound from the crowd is deafening. I turn to the screen, finding my name, and time—

My cheer mingles with the rest of the crowd, my hand coming down to slap against the water. My heart is pounding in my chest, the blood pumping so hard through my veins I can feel it pounding in my head. The reality of what this means sinks in faster than I expect. There’s no need for a moment to take it in, no waiting to see if disqualified will appear beside my race. I swam a good race, and it paid off.

I’m an Olympic gold medalist.

“PresentingyourOlympicgoldmedalist, Carter Abrams!”

My face aches from smiling as I step up onto the podium, arms raised in the air. This is the moment I’ve worked my whole career for and one I wasn’t sure I’d ever get. I duck my head, accepting the medal, and shake the hand of the presenter, thanking him, and accepting his congratulations. Cameras flash in my face as I hold the medal up for photos. The crowd is cheering and screaming; the sound making my ears ring more than any concert ever has.

When the crowd quiets down, and the anthem begins to play, everything around me shifts.

I take the moment in, blinking back tears as I watch the flag raise. It’s the culmination of every bit of hard work I’ve put into my career. It’s the bisexual kid from Arizona who’d been told his dreams wouldn’t come true countless times, seeing them realized before his eyes. When I decided to go for this, I didn’t set out to change the game or to be a voice for athletes who’ve been pushed back, quieted for years. I did this for myself, because it’s what I wanted to do with my life. Everything else is a bonus.

I have measured every high and every low of my life to this sport, as it is as much a part of me as my sexuality is. It’s woven into the pieces that come together to create my story, and I know that kid from Arizona would be damn proud of the man standing here today.

As soon as I step off the podium, I follow the same path so many other athletes have made and climb the stands to greet my family, not caring about the cameras following close behind me. I’m not sure there’s a single dry eye in the entire row. As my parents pull me into a hug, their tears mix with my own. When my mom finally releases me, I hand her the flowers, thanking them for everything they’ve done for me over the years.

When they release me, I move down the line, starting with Bryce and Josie, who give me a quick group hug, knowing I don’t have much time. When I reach Bryce, his hand claps against my back, pulling me in close. We’re both laughing, but there are tears mixed in there too as he tells me how fucking proud he is of me.

Kat’s the last one I reach, and I instantly pull her in for a kiss. Her hands are shaking as they cup my cheeks. She presses a few more quick kisses to my lips once I pull away.

When I finally pull back, she’s looking at me with wide, glossy eyes. I expect her to tell me how proud she is of me or how much she loves me, both things I already know. Instead, she swallows and says, “I’m so grateful to know you.”

There’s nothing terribly romantic about the words, but they’re true. The truth behind them rings louder than the words themselves and I get it. I get what she means. How meeting her, getting to know her, changed everything for me, and for her.

Bryce and Josie might have saved each other, but Kat and I fought through hell to come together.