Page 38

“Okay, fine! First, he’s a client that I’m working for. Second, he lives in another state. Third, he’s not even interested in me.”

“Okay, first of all, is there any rule that says you can’t date a client?” I shake my head at Mia’s question, because it’s not something that has ever come up. “As long as you keep things professional, and I know you both will, then you should be good. Second, he’s moving here in less than a year. That’s a stupid excuse, and he’s just as close to you as your current boyfriend is.”

“And third,” Josie pipes up from the backseat. “The idea that he’s not interested is just ridiculous! We were all at dinner that night after the meet. We saw you two giving each other heart eyes.”

I groan. “We were talking, not giving each other heart eyes.” There’s a momentary pause before I find myself weakly asking, “Wait, do you think he likes me?”

In answer to my question, I’m met with more piercing squeals from both Mia and Josie this time. They immediately start talking over one another, trying to fill me in on all the things I need to know about Carter, but I can only partially listen. I’m so wrapped up in this idea that there could be something more between the two of us, but I’m worried about what will happen if I pursue something like that.

The rest of the day is spent with the two of them feeding me little tidbits of information about Carter. His favorite color is jade green; he always puts the creamer in before his coffee and makes a big deal about it; he broke his leg when he was ten and claims it was Bryce’s fault; his family is small but loud; his Olympic rings tattoo is low on his right hip. A bunch of information I don’t need, but I find myself filing it away for future reference. These are all things that come from people who know someone well, and I crave to know more about him, but also want to discover those things myself.

Laterthatevening,everyoneis scattered throughout my rental in comfortable clothes. Mia had just opened the second bottle of wine and we were discussing some of our favorite TV shows while the guys cooked dinner. It was going to be a simple spread of finger foods—things that I had an inkling Carter’s coach wouldn’t like so much. Apparently, he and Bryce had a solid workout, so he felt he could cheat a little.

With a wineglass in hand and comfy sweats on, I’m surprised by how easy it is for me to be myself among this group. There’s no need to hide my dorky obsessions or present myself a certain way. Who I am is more than enough. The saying 'show up as you are' has never been true to me until this moment. My smile is wide and hasn’t diminished in the hours since they got here. Bryce is making something that involves fried cheese and I’m excited about it. Mia is talking about a new yoga class she wants us all to try, and it’s all just so easy.

These are the kinds of connections I’ve waited my whole life for. Even though they’re fleeting, and I’ll be gone in a couple of months, I long to hold on to them as long as I can. When Carter and Bryce start bringing food over to the large coffee table, I’m surrounded by foods I’d never be comfortable eating in front of Will or my parents, knowing comments about my “less than ideal” figure would be made.

Here, though, I reach for a mozzarella stick, sharing a grin with Carter because our hands brush as we go for the same one. Ever the gentleman, he hands it to me before reaching for another one. It’s all so easy.

March2024

Pools have always been a calm place to me, a tool to help center myself as the world rages on around me. The shimmering blue tone, the reflections, the unstable way the lines seem to bend and arch beneath the depth of the water—a pool has always been home to me.

So, when I wake up early on Sunday morning, hours before I need to head back to Georgia, I know Bryce wouldn’t be surprised to find out I left and sought out the comfort of the only pool I have access to in this state. My pool. Our pool.

“What are you doing here?”

The sun is barely peeking up over the horizon when I turn to see Katrina coming toward me, dressed in leggings, and a crew neck sweatshirt. There’s not an ounce of makeup on her face and she’s pulled her blonde hair into a messy ponytail. Most endearing of all, she’s wearing glasses. Something tells me not too many people get to see her like this, and I instantly feel like one of the luckiest men in the world.

Even if it means nothing.

“Just getting caught up in my own thoughts,” I tease. “What about you? As I recall, I’m the one who owns this place.”

She sits next to me on the bench, so close our legs are practically touching. “Ah, yes, but I also have a key and free rein for the duration of the remodel.”

I bite back a grin. “Seriously, the sun is not even up yet. Why are you here?”

“Couldn’t sleep. I had a couple of things to check.” She gives a casual shrug, like it’s the easiest explanation in the world. “All right, your turn. What’s got you up at dawn?”

I look back over the water, which is mostly still. “I told you, lost in my thoughts.”

“That’s not an answer.” When she laughs, the sound seems to bounce all around me. “You’re worried about this summer, aren’t you?”

I fight not to let my jaw drop open. How did she possibly know that? “I’ve never done this without Bryce.”

I can feel her gaze on the side of my face, but I keep staring straight ahead. “Never? I thought he retired a couple of years ago.”

“The Olympics, I mean. I’ve gone to international meets since he retired, but I’ve never done Trials or the Games without him. I followed a coach out to Georgia after we graduated, and that was the first time we really separated.”

“Because he’s not there at all,” she says in realization.

I nod and say, “People are still surprised that he retired while I didn’t. They ask me all the time if he’s going to make some kind of miraculous comeback or if I can even do this without him. There aren’t a lot of people who think I can.”

“Well, that’s bullshit,” she scoffed. “From my understanding, which I know is limited, you’re doing well. The way Bryce talks, it sounds like you have a good shot at making the team.”

The way she says it sounds so uncertain, and I can’t help but chuckle. “Bryce wasn’t kidding, was he? You really know nothing about this sport.”

“I’m trying!” she protests, but her scowl only makes me laugh harder. “I’m attempting to learn. I know you mainly swim the 400-meter IM and the 200-meter freestyle. I don’t know what any of that really means, though.”