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“I’m an adult,” I say as we head to the cashier. “I get that you’re looking out for me, but I’m making this decision. Please, can westop with the lectures?”

“But are you listening to me? Please, just tell me that you’re hearing me. I don’t want you to make the mistakes I did, especially this early in the game.”

I sigh. “Look, I get it. You’re more experienced. I figured this out really late. But you know what? Valeria’s experienced too. If she agrees to have sex with me, then clearly she thinks I’m ready.”

Romy snorts. “Are you serious? Luna, she wants to have sex with you. Of course she’ll trust you when you say you’re ready. I’m your unbiased friend.”

I pay for the teddy, pulling my gaze from her. Wyatt said something about Romy being weird lately. Maybe it wasn’t just a onetime thing. And now that I think about it, there was also the whole mousse thing when she was drunk and trying to crawl over me and Valeria…Yeah, she was drunk, and she always acts a little off when she’s drunk, but I can’t shake it. Not that I think Romy would do anything outrageous, but she has been acting weird. Jealous, perhaps. It’s probably unconscious, but I’m tired of it interfering with my life and I’m tired of the advice she’s been giving me.

Maybe it’s a sign that I need to get more queer opinions. I shouldn’t have overwhelmed Romy with all this anyway.

I should be more compassionate. Ask what’s been going on with her.

But instead I say, “Sometimes it feels like you’re the most biased one,” and I stride out of the store.

chapter twenty

It’s definitely a casual-formal wrap party, just a private room in a fancy restaurant in Beverly Hills, but I’m shivering uncontrollably parking in front of Valeria’s house in Hollywood Hills. I’m familiar with the sight of her not-mansion-but-still-decorated-like-a-mansion house, but everything feels almost uncanny valley. Like I’ve entered an entirely new time line and haven’t quite processed it yet.

“Look at you!” Valeria says as she answers the door. She kisses me on the lips. My body goes hot at her touch, no matter how routine it’s become. “You look gorgeous.”

It’s nothing compared with her look: a shirtless suit with a patterned bra visible underneath and perfect clean black leather slip-ons. It’s the chicest, gayest look I’ve seen from her yet.

I unzip the side of my dress, revealing the teddy underneath. “Well, more gorgeous on the inside.”

Valeria’s eyes widen, and she bites her lip. A spark ignites in my stomach. And when she runs a finger over the lace, I feel it knock through my whole body. For the briefest second, I taste the words in the back of my throat: What happens if we go to the party late? What would parties feel like if I were no longer a virgin?

Instead I ask, “Ready to go?”

She interlaces her fingers with mine. “Ready for about half of it, but that’s all I can ask for.”

We step into her car. Valeria is driving. Romy mentioned that being a “top thing,” and it’s weird to think about how we fell into our roles immediately without even talking about it. For now, anyway. I’m perfectly happy to drive if she wants me to. I’m sure she wouldn’t care that my car is shitty.

“Who’s gonna be there that you’re not cool with?” I ask.

She adjusts her grip on the steering wheel. “Just my whole team. I always have to do a little more fake schmoozing when they’re around, and I owe them a lot for giving this pipe dreamtheir approval.” A grin spreads across her face. “I can’t wait for you to meet them. I’ve gushed about you.”

I can’t believe this is real. “I’d love to.”

Find Brendan, say hi to Valeria’s team. This feels so adult.

She kisses my hand at a stop sign and then puts hers back on the wheel.

My fingers are already itching to text Romy. Call Romy. Run back to the apartment and tell her, our little fight yesterday be damned. We’re best friends. We tell each other when good things happen. It’s just like how she’d tell me if the agent offered to represent her.

The restaurant is pretty nondescript. It has the dark walls, thick wooden tables, and pristine tablecloths like any fancy Beverly Hills restaurant. A host leads Valeria and me upstairs, where the decor changes. In this space there are coffee tables nestled among velvet couches. A bar and a buffet are placed off to one side.

Unlike what happens in my dreams, the room doesn’t fall silent the moment Valeria and I show up. The only thing that changes is that Valeria puts a foot more distance between us. Not lover distance, not even friend distance. Acquaintance distance.

And right away, Wyatt and Steven come walking up to us. Wyatt’s looking sharp but still very barnacle-like with his former boss. Former, right? I can’t remember where in the process he is with the move.

“Looking good,” Wyatt says, giving me a hug.

Valeria and Steven exchange a quick hug and a cheek kiss before Steven turns to me.

“Linda, right?” he says.

Valeria and Wyatt exchange a look. Valeria rolls her eyes.