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“Yeah, just give me a minute.”

I slowly rise from my knees-to-chest position on my bathroom floor. I turn on the sink, splash a little water on my face. Tonight has to go well. It will go well. Wyatt and I are gonna make sure things go well. Then he and Romy will leave once I’m comfortable, and I’ll get my first girl kiss. No more ruminating thoughts. This is all my stupid fucking body. If I can just get myself to physically relax, I can get my makeup on. We can get started.

I open my medicine cabinet. Pull out the Emergency Xanax. Consider it.

I set the newest antianxiety supplement my mom recommended beside the prescription bottle. I’ve never used it before, but Mom says it’s effective.

But if it’s not…

I’ve taken Xanax before. It’s killed my panic attacks before they started. This isn’t a full panic attack, but the Xanax will definitely help. I need calm right now. Karaoke is a calm activity anyway.

I twist open the Xanax bottle, take a pill, and wash it down with sink water.

More knocking. “I can help you with your makeup if you want.”

I push the Xanax and the herbal supplement back into my cabinet. “Sure! Come in!”

Romy helps me pick out a makeup palette. It gets put on my face. The two of us Uber over to the lounge, where Wyatt is already waiting with a huge grin on his face.

The hallways are lined in tile, and neon lights flash across the walls and the ceiling. We’ve already rented a private room.

A nice private room, in fact. The couch wraps around a lacquered wooden table that has songbooks neatly placed in the middle. The TV is new and clear, and there’s a Warholian painting of a chimpanzee on a green background on the wall. The dim room is already illuminated by a moving neon display. Even watching the colored dots fall on and off Romy’s face is mesmerizing.

Valeria comes in exactly on time in a formfitting black dress. She hugs Romy and Wyatt. Everything is going smoothly. When she gets to me, she pulls me into a particularly snug hug.

“Happy birthday,” she says, and kisses me on the cheek.

The Xanax is working. I’m so chill, but god, that kiss goes through me like a rocket. Face hot, hands numb, holy shit she just put her lips to my face stokedness.

Maybe this will just work. I can’t believe I almost canceled.

“So for a present, I was gonna get you alcohol anyway, but you probably have a minimum, so I’m buying whatever,” Valeria says.

“You’re my favorite client,” Wyatt says as he scans the drink menu.

We arrange ourselves very specifically, with Valeria on the far left facing the door, me next to her, Romy next to me, and Wyatt on the other end.

“Are you two allowed to hang outside of work?” Romy asks. “Genuinely curious.”

“I dare you to rat us out,” Wyatt says, nudging Romy.

“I’ve become friends with a couple assistants. It’s fine,” Valeria says.

Wyatt grins. “Besides, I’m not gonna be an assistant for long.”

“Awesome,” Valeria says. “Talent?”

“Hopefully.”

Romy throws an arm around Wyatt. “Don’t lose the ability to answer phones too quickly.”

We get a first round of drinks and everyone cheers to my nonexistent birthday. I take barely a sip in order to keep the Xanax working at optimum level.

I pull over one of the songbooks once everyone’s had a bit to drink. Scoot just a bit closer to Valeria. Close enough that I can just about feel her body heat on the couch. “Do you have any preferences?” I ask her.

She leans over to read the songs, running her finger along the lines to follow. “I can make whatever you pick work.” Valeria looks over to Romy. “By the way, no one told me how important product is for this cut.”

Romy laughs. “Guessing you forgot what Sid told you?” Valeria nods. “Yeah, product’s king. Do you have any in right now?”