Page 104 of Ride Me Cowboy

“Butwhydid she go?” Mack pushes. “You made her leave, didn’t you?”

“I told her she should go,” I repeat. “But she could have stayed.”

“We’re missing something,” Mackenzie insists. “Did the sister-in-law upset her?”

“They fought,” I say. “But no, that’s not why she left.”

“Then why? And where’s she gone?”

Realizing I have no idea where Beth is at this moment makes my gut roll and I take a step backwards with the sheer force of that. She’s out there somewhere, hurting and alone, and I don’t even know where. It’s like a massive emptiness inside me, spreading from fingertip to fingertip, taking over my soul.

“I don’t know.” My voice sounds raw, thickened by emotion.

“New York?” Cassidy suggests.

“Maybe,” I grunt. But that doesn’t make me feel any better. I don’t know if she was ready to go back there. I don’t know if that’s what she wanted.

Actually, yes, I do. I know she wanted to stay here with me. With us. Not just for another month, but forever. That’s why I had to let her go, because there’s no such thing as forever, and hoping for it is stupid.

“She liked you,” Mack says, shaking her head. “And she liked us. She was a part of all this; we need her.”

I shake my head, instantly rejecting that. “No, we don’t.” I don’t need anyone, but I don’t particularly feel like reminding them of that.

Mack looks around the room, waiting for back up, then sighs. “Okay, whatever. I’m going to be…somewhere else. You’re making me crazy, Cole Donovan.” She leaves the room without a backwards glance, clearly pissed.

She’s not the only one. Except the only person I can blame for this is me.

“So, who’s going to do the books ‘til Reagan gets back?” Austin asks, swirling his wine around in his glass. I watch the rich,red color move like waves against the sides, leaving sticky legs running from top to bottom.

“I will,” I mutter. Like I have time for it. Still, it’s better than getting anyone else in, and having to show them what to do. Sitting at Beth’s desk, where she should be. The ache spreads, almost paralysing me.

“I still don’t understand,” Cassidy says. “Beth didn’t seem like she wanted to leave this morning. It seemed like the furthest thing from her mind.”

“Cass—,”

“No, hear me out,” she says, holding up a hand. “Mack’s right. She obviously loves this place. Look at all the stuff she’s done with the social media. Look at how Mack’s opened up to her, for God’s sake. So, either something happened with the sister-in-law, or something else did, because there’s no way that girl was just going to up and walk out of here.”

I square my shoulders.

“She didn’t even say goodbye,” Austin points out. “That’s not like Beth.”

About an hour after walking out of the kitchen, I’d heard her car start up. I’d moved to the window, so saw her drive away. No goodbye. Then again, I guess I did that for both of us.

“It was time for her to leave.”

“You keep saying that like this doesn’t affect all of us,” Cassidy says.

“You’ve known her about three seconds,” I snap.

“Yes, but I liked her. And I liked what she did for you. Do you not even see how different you are around her? Because of her?”

I glance up as Mackenzie walks into the room, holding a piece of paper.

“What’s that?” I ask, glad to be able to change the subject.

“A letter.” Her eyes land on mine, still laced with accusation, but something else, too—moisture. And that is so completely unlike Mack, I do a double take.

“It’s from Beth. Who wants to hear it?”