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She's exceptionally tall, with tanned olive skin and big, beautiful eyes. Her hair is the color of melted cacote, falling in perfect waves down to her waist. In typical Erdu fashion, she’s covered in all kinds of metal jewelry: bracelets and bangles up her arms, multiple necklaces, and earrings, and even some pieces woven into her hair.

Riley is clearly trying to be sneaky, and she seems to enjoy being part of the tryst. Both of them keep looking around to make sure they aren't seen or followed before making a dash up to her room. Fortunately for them, the inn’s rooms all have their entrances outside.

He follows her into the room, and I watch as the curtains are drawn so that no one, including me, will be able to see what they are doing.But I know what they are doing.

Why does it bother me so much? Nothing truly happened between us, as Riley said. It’s not as though we have made any promises or have had a chance to be alone since. Though he’s found a way to be alone with another woman.

It was all a game from the beginning.

Yet I still crave—craved—his touch.

CHAPTER NINETEEN

Iswallow, pushing everything I’m feeling down into the vast void of darkness within me. Everything about this situation, about Riley, about whatever the fuck is going on in that room. I opt for a new vantage point to people-watch instead.

I swing down from my perch on top of the stable roof and land softly on the sandy dirt in my pocket of darkness.Hearing a loud huff, I make the decision to visit the horses. Applemint wasn’t with me long, but I miss the companionship.

I sneak in and make sure none of the stable kids are around before sticking my head in the first stall to greet the horse inside. A massive sack of broken carrot pieces had sat at the entrance, so I double back for them, making my way around to feed one to each horse.

Their velvet-soft lips and their spiky whiskers bring me joy for a reason I don’t fully understand. After giving each one some attention, I should go, but as I turn to leave, the large chestnut brown pony with fluffy ears nips at my shoulder.

“Sorry, sweet girl, no more carrots,” I whisper as I cuddle into her. She rests her head over my shoulder, allowing me to cuddle her, and I breathe in her musky animal scent while stroking down her long neck.

I’m startled by a laugh that sounds like a duck, much closer than I would like. I had been so transfixed by the pony that I was being a terrible sneak.Realizing I won’t have the opportunity to leave, I slip into the pony’s stall. Crouching behind the partitioned wall, watching through the cracks in the wood, I’m able to see two men enter.

By sheer dumb luck, it’s the Erduborn man from Nemoris Teorann with the duck laugh. Was he following us? It surely cannot be a coincidence that he’s here, even if he is Erduborn.The two men stand inside, near the entrance to the stables.

“Nah, we can’t wait that long,” the man—who I have decided I will call Duckhead—says to his companion. “We’re leaving soon and need to have that cart good to go. Don’t need to be a good one, just needs to get as far as Forsto.”

“Mm. Mm. How much we talkin’? I have a single horse cart that’ll do the trick,” says Duckhead’s companion. “It’s light. Your pony could pull it.”

I hope they don’t intend to get the pony right now, as I’m fairly certain my stall mate is the only pony in the stables. The pony tries to nibble and pull at the fabric covering my feet, reminding me of Applemint’s cheeky spirit.

“I was going to sell her, but that might work better now I think it. Show me. How much?” Duckhead is muttering as he and his companion leave the stable the way they’d come.

I stay long enough I can no longer hear them before giving the pony a little kiss goodbye on her cheek.

“I hope Duckhead treats you well my little friend. Would you tell me if he was up to something nefarious if you could?” She blows a puff of hot air out of her nose in response, and I chuckle.One more kiss and I sneak out of the stable successfully.

I’m standing in my pocket of darkness—deciding whether to go to bed, try to find Duckhead, report to Beans, or find a new spying spot—when the door to Riley’sfriend’sroom opens. A warm beam of light spills out as the woman sticks her head out and looks around. Checking for witnesses, I guess.

With the coast clear, Riley comes out while swinging his jacket on. He kisses the woman on the cheek, and she reaches up with one hand to cup his face and says something softly to him.

Unable to bear the display of affection, or my own volatile emotions beginning to rise, I turn around and melt into the shadows.

I do another perimeter check, seeing if I can find Duckhead or his companion. Seeing what looks like a small, single horse-pulled cart out the front of one of the inn’s rooms, I hoist myself up a tree for a new vantage point, with a full view of the room and cart.

The night passes with no movement, and I need at least a little sleep so I’m not useless tomorrow. I’ll wake up early and come back. Stumbling into my room, I don’t bother taking off my sneaksuit or cleaning the kajal from my face before passing out.

The morning comes much too quickly, though the sun has not yet fully risen. I’m washed, packed, and ready to go, so I leave my bags outside my door as I go to check on the cart. It’s gone, along with the pony from the stable. I can’t be sure when they left, but I hope it’s a good thing that they’ve left before us.

Beans’ lantern light is shining through his window, so I knock gently on his door. Going downstairs together, I decide against telling him about Duckhead. I'm not used to working with a team, and I don’t want to tell any of them. The fact Riley would know I was out sneaking and may have seen him with the Erduborn woman is something I want to avoid.

The kitchen isn’t open, but they offer us some warm oat muffins and fresh fruit. We happily accept, taking portions for the others, too. Tovi and Bitty arrive next, and Tovi has a scowl on her face until she sees the food. She steals a piece of melon from my plate and sticks her tongue out.

“Everyone sleep well?” Tovi asks with a yawn. “You’d think I wouldn’t be tired, seeing as I went to bed before the sun set.” At least it won’t be too obvious how tired I am with everyone having a terrible night’s sleep.

This starts a conversation about how uncomfortable the mattresses were before I’m distracted by Riley sauntering in. He holds my stare, a smile starting to curve his lips before I quickly look away.