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She laughs. “I won’t go into detail, Ethan, just as I trust you not to make out in my kitchen when you come home with your new lover-boy.”

My heart jumps into my throat. “Mother, I…don’t think that’s going to happen this year.”

“So youdohave a new boy. Tell me.” I can hear her smile through the phone.

I try to blink away my tears. “I met someone, but then I completely messed it up.”

“Oh, I’m sure you’ll work it out. What’s his name?”

I chew on my bottom lip. I’m at a crossroads now. I can either spill my guts to my mother or keep her in the dark.

I close my eyes.

“Dante. Dante Romano, but there are things you should know about him and his family.”

“Like what?”

“Do you promise not to freak out?”

“I’ll do my best, honey.”

I take a deep breath with my eyes still closed.

“His family is in the mafia. They’re dangerous, but they also keep a lot of this town going. It’s hard to explain, but where there’s crime there’s profit. The biggest problem is that other families want to control what the Romanos have, which is what makes us being together so dangerous. I can be used against him. When my car was wrecked a few weeks ago, it was because of a rival family, not a normal accident. Dante protected me. He saved my life,” I explain this in a rambling manner, though I attempt to breathe steadily through it all.

“Good Lord, Ethan,” my mother says with an exhale. “I didn’t think you could get yourself into something like that.”

“I didn’t try. It just happened. I know that sounds like an excuse, but…I’ve never felt this way about anyone before, Mom.”

“Like what?” she asks.

“Happy. Wanted. When we’re together I feel safe, and it’s like I was always supposed to know him.” I blush hearing myself say those words, feeling like a kid with a silly crush.

“You’re so young; normally I’d say you might be jumping into things, but I know what it’s like to feel that way because of how I fell for your father. This Dante sounds so dangerous, though. Are you sure you want to be a part of that?” I can hear the fear in her voice.

For the first time everything feels clear in my head. Sure, I’m scared, but having everything laid out like this…I know what I want.

“Yes. I know the risks,” I tell her.

“I don’t know if I approve of…all of it. I don’t really understand the crime and danger. But I know that since you were born you’ve been teaching me new things. I want you to be happy. So why aren’t you with this young man?”

Those tears finally fall down my face. “It’s complicated. I need to fix it. I will,” I say, determined. “Just…thank you, Mom. I was so scared to tell you, to tell anyone.”

“Don’t be. I love you, and your father loves you, too. Do you want me to tell him all this for you?” she asks.

“No, I’ll tell him, but I need to go fix things with Dante,” I tell her. “I love you, too.”

“Your father is ice fishing this weekend anyhow. You know he barely has signal up there. You can tell him when you get down here,” she says.

I swallow the nervousness and try to stick to the feeling of confidence and determination this conversation has brought me.

“Okay. I’ll talk to you later.”

“Let me know how it goes, sweetie.”

With that, I end the call and get in the shower faster than I ever have.

When I’m done showering, I head out into the freezing, snowy weather. My first intention is to walk to the campus coffee shop where it all started and get two coffees and two muffins. Then I’ll find a ride-share and go to Dante’s. He should be there, right?