Page 49 of If It's You

Christian staredat the wrinkled photograph in his hand. It had been too long since he’d seen the face in that picture. Since he’d known a hug like that. He stared at his dad’s eyes, the same ones Christian had. They were honest and kind eyes. His dad had never known luxury, but he had worked hard every day to provide for their family. Too bad it hadn’t mattered in the end.

He shoved the picture back into its hiding place, in the front page of Fitzgerald’sThe Great Gatsby,and caressed his dad’s fading name in the top left corner.

Declan Tate Slade.

It was his dad’s favorite book. Christian had yet to read it. But he carried it around as if he would someday, as if it held all the answers to why his Dad had to die.

He flipped to the first page, read the first sentence, and shut the book again. It wasn’t right. He shouldn’t be looking for pieces of his dad in a book.

“Want to go over to Uncle Eric’s?” Jayce asked.

Christian shoved the book beneath his pillow on the bunk bed they shared at the farmhouse.

“Not really.” He played with the crusty glue surrounding the cut on his side. He thought Maizie had been joking when she’d said all he needed was superglue. So when the doctor had pulled out a little blue tube, he’d nearly laughed. Turns out, super glue is actually quite effective. And much cheaper than stitches.

“Come on. I’m bored. Maybe we can convince Maizie to take us around town.”

“No, thank you.”

There wasn’t much to do—or see—in town, but he knew what Jayce wanted to do. Find Lindsay. Ever since the little party at the pond, she and Jayce had been texting nonstop. Late into the night. Every night. Between him and the cows mooing, Christian doubted he’d ever get a good night’s sleep here.

“Let’s go play basketball with the boys or something, then.” Jayce relinquished his previous endeavor.

Christian didn’t feel like doing much of anything, but basketball had always gotten him out of a bad mood in high school. Why had he pushed everything good out of his life? Maybe it was time to let some of it back in.

* * *

“I brought the snacks,”Lindsay said, holding up a bag of Twizzlers and a package of Oreos.

“You’re an angel.” Maizie threw her hands out, accepting the snacks for their weekly hang out.

“I know,” Lindsay said. She looked around the room while adjusting her old soccer tee.

Maizie blinked. Lindsay was wearing a t-shirt? And sweats? And why wasn’t her makeup done?

“Who are you, and what have you done with my best friend?”

“What are you talking about?” Lindsay looked away while adjusting her ponytail.

Maizie gestured to her best friend’s outfit. “I thought you said the only time you could wear a ponytail was for soccer.”

Lindsay shrugged. “I just wanted to relax tonight. What’s wrong with that?”

What’s wrong was that that never actually happened. Lindsay brought snacks to soften Maizie up so that Maizie would eventually agree to do a Tik Tok with her. Most of the time they never even made it to the movie.

“No Tik Tok’s?” Maizie asked in disbelief.

Lindsay shook her head and placed her phone face down on the counter. “Not tonight.”

“Are you okay? Are you sick?” Maizie asked. She had to be sure this was real life.

Lindsay rolled her eyes. “Yes, I’m fine. I just need a break from social media. That’s all.”

Maizie pursed her lips, looking for clues that her friend was lying, but Lindsay was serious. “Maybe you’ll actually get some sleep now,” Maizie teased.

Lindsay laughed and looked at the front door again.

“Who are you looking for?”