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Pleased with my final result, I call up the community exhibit near Holy Trinity to let them know I have the next greatest addition to their gallery.

19

Drew

Just when I thought things couldn’t get worse for me, it

did. I shouldn’t have been so stupid to let myself believe Laine could be someone who stays. I should have known she would change. Everyone in my life changes for the worse.

I was right. Laine was never going to stay long enough for us to have a happy ending. She stayed long enough to give us false hope for one.

How brainless of me to think I could even talk her out of falling into the traps of religious guilt. How ignorant of me to believe that if anyone were to stay, it would have been Laine.

If there’s anything I learned now, it’s that there are no exceptions when it comes to people in my life changing and leaving me behind. Becoming new, better people. People who prefer the version of themselves that they become without me. People who decide that their better versions don’t include me in it.

Even my own mom fantasizes about the life she could’ve had without me. One where my dad didn’t leave her with the burden of being a single mother to a child she wasn’t even supposed to have.

It was clear in her argument with my dad that she idealizes the version of herself that didn’t raise me, even though he took away the chance of her ever meeting that woman. The woman who wasn’t held back by a child whom she only wanted with him.

******

I’ve spent the past couple of weeks bedrotting, endlessly scrolling on social media, and trying to find a distraction from everything. After today’s hours of mindless scrolling, I’ve seenit all, from hippos chomping on watermelons bigger than their heads to little dachshund puppies choosing their collar colors.

Glibby can sense something’s going on, because she’s been curled up at the foot of my bed ever since Roy returned, only getting up to eat and poop. I’m not complaining, though. It’s been nice to have the company of someone who can’t exactly disappoint me. At leastsomeone’sloyal.

I slowly start to doze off but jerk myself awake, knowing that if I nap now, I won’t be able to fall asleep later.

Just as I begin to think I’ve seen it all, Tatum texts. I jolt my head up from my pillow and try to get my drowsy eyes to focus on the screen long enough to swipe up and ignore her text. My head is far too foggy to respond now, and I know if I do, I may say something I’ll regret later.

I start to doze off again, but then jolt myself up and stare intently at yet another hippo mukbang video to stay awake.

Tatum texts again, and then again, and then again. Before I know it, I have seven unread texts from her. This must be urgent because usually, Tatum doesn’t spam like this.

As I force myself to open our messages, I’m greeted with a long string of text bubbles containing too many exclamation points for any sane person to type.

Tatum

5:46 pm

drew! did you see the local news??

DREW!!

laine’s in the news, drew!

apparently her painting has broken some sort of record!

HELLO!!

earth to drew!!

DREW!! LAINE. IS. IN. THE. LOCAL. NEWS.

Me

5:52 pm what??

for what?