Page 85 of Guitars and Cages

“Why?”

“’Cause you’re the only person I can really talk to, so let’s be two messed up fuck-ups together, okay?”

I couldn’t help but snort at that. “You a fuck-up? Yeah, whatever.”

“Think what you like, but trust me when I say that you aren’t the only one with problems. Maybe once we get you through this, I’ll tell you more.”

“You...you’d wanna talk to me?”

He burst out laughing, but it sounded hollow, hurt, and for the first time I started to think he wasn’t kidding. “Is that so hard to believe?”

“A little, I guess. I mean, like I said, Gage was the only friend I had...until now...you, uhh, really are trying to be my friend?”

“Yeah, I am.”

“I, uhh...thanks, Conner.”

“You’re welcome. Get some sleep, okay? I’ll wake you when I start needing directions.”

“Okay,” I said, curling on my side in the seat. He turned the radio on low and I started drifting off toDylantelling the world to get stoned. For the first time in days, I was glad I wasn’t.

Chapter Thirty

Main Street looked the same, still bordered by old-style streetlights and brick storefronts with brightly colored window displays. The tables outside the ice-cream shop were full of kids with scooters and skateboards, licking cones, and for a moment, I was reminded of the days I would sit there with my brothers.

“Take a left,” I said, clutching the arm of the door. I’d started shaking the moment we hit the county line, and now I felt like I was gonna puke. Conner made the turn, and there was the hospital, a couple blocks down on the right. I put my head down on the dash, trying to take a few deep breaths, anything to calm myself. The car came to a stop and I heard his seatbelt unbuckle, but I wasn’t ready to move. I was still trying not to be sick. I couldn’t do this; there was no way, I shouldn’t have come.

“Breathe, Asher, slow and easy. Come on, now.”

His voice was low, calm, and steady in my ear, while his warm hand caressed my back. He rested his head on my shoulder as he talked to me, and inch by inch I began to relax and breathe a bit easier. He moved his hand from my back to stroke my hair, and my breathing finally returned to something close to normal.

“I’m gonna be with you, okay? Whatever happens, you’re not alone.”

I nodded, breathing out slowly. We stayed like that for a few more minutes, until I was sure I could manage to do this; then I sat up, and Conner let me go. I hated losing the feel of his hand in my hair, but I needed to stop stalling. It was time to bite the bullet. I took off my seatbelt and opened the car door, stepping out into the heat of the day. Closing my eyes, I could smell the sunshine, fresh-cut grass, and cattle.

After another deep breath and another long, slow exhale, I shoved my hands in my pockets and walked through the doors of the hospital with Conner at my side. It had been years since I’d been there and the waiting-room color had changed from puce to a sickly pea green—not really an improvement. I walked up to the desk, but before I could say a word, I heard someone calling my name. It’s not like I could have ever forgotten that voice. Turning my head, I saw her storming toward me like a runaway train and I prepared myself for the collision.

Eve came to an abrupt stop, and then hauled off and slapped me across the face. I’d been expecting that and didn’t even turn my head to lessen the impact, just stood still while she grimaced and shook her hand.

“You son of a bitch, you could have at least answered your fucking phone!”

“I know.”

“God damn you, Asher, dammit, I didn’t think you’d come.”

I had an arm full of sobbing blonde before I could blink, and I stood there like an idiot, awkwardly patting her back while she clung to me. It took her a couple minutes to pull away and angrily swipe at her eyes, and I let go when she did, stepping back.

“Is he still alive?” I asked.

She nodded, sniffling. “But it’s bad. They’re surprised he’s held on this long. Come on, his dad is with him now.”

“His dad? Eve, I...he’s not gonna let me in there.”

She turned to me, frowning. “Why the hell wouldn’t he? He’s the one who told me to call you.”

I stood there stupidly. “Huh?”

“Come on, Asher, dammit, why do you have to make everything so fucking hard?”