Page 138 of Guitars and Cages

He just shook his head, which pissed me off, though I was starting to wonder if that’s how him and Morgan felt when I tried to hide behind my hair.

“Dammit, did you go out somewhere trying to get pictures and get yourself hurt?”

“No.”

Okay, I could breathe easier then, maybe. “Then what happened, and where are you hurt?”

Another shrug. I was about to shake the hell out of him.

“Did something happen at work? Did you get into it with your folks again, or Jace? You look like you’ve been flying high and haven’t slept in days.”

“I haven’t, I couldn’t. Every time I try to sleep I see you taking off out of the bar. I can guess where you ran to, and picturing you there hasn’t made it any easier to sleep, either. I tried going by your apartment, but your brother slammed the door on me. I figured you’d told him you didn’t want me around; it wasn’t until the third time I went back that he told me you didn’t live there anymore.”

He looked like walking misery, like seriously worse than those paintings at the museum Alexia had taken me and Rory to see. My brain was having a very hard time accepting that he was this upset and miserable over me.

“Asher, I swear, I just wanted Morgan to stop tearing into you. I could see how much it was hurting you, and you wouldn’t stand up for yourself, and he kept at you, and then when he said what he said about Gage, I lost it. I know it wasn’t my place to say anything, and I know I betrayed your trust, but I didn’t do it to hurt you, I swear I didn’t.”

He swiped at his eyes, his breath catching when he tried to keep talking.

“I don’t expect you to want to talk to me again.—I just, I wanted to apologize, and beg you to stay away from River’s End. You don’t need that Catfish guy; you’ve got too much potential to let him own you.”

“River’s End burned.”

“What?”

I smiled grimly. “You must not read the paper any more than I do. River’s End burned that same night. Catfish is dead; he died in the fire. I watched them pull his body from the building.”

“So you did go there,” he said sadly.

“Yeah, like always. Shit went wrong and it was the first place I headed, but by the time I got there it was in flames and there were the bodies of some of the people they’d already pulled out on the ground, covered in sheets. It smelled like burnt flesh and flames, and I got sick just standing there. If you hadn’t gotten me out of there when you did, I prolly would have been one of those bodies. I would have burned to death cuffed to Catfish’s bed. You saved my life that night; thank you.”

His ocean-colored eyes lit up, and I could see the hope shining in them. I closed the space between us, and for the first time ever, I was the one to reach out and seek contact. I placed my hand on his arm and rubbed lightly, hoping he’d take it for the comforting gesture I intended it to be.

“I know you didn’t mean to tell Morgan. I took off because I didn’t want to see his reaction to what you told him. I figured he’d think I was trash and cut ties with me altogether, and I guess that was really why I was mad at you. I’m kinda starting to learn that I can’t hold things together with lies, or at least, I can’t and not expect them to eventually unravel.”

“Still, I should have kept my mouth shut; it wasn’t my secret to tell.”

“No, it wasn’t, but you did for me what I’ve been too much of a coward to do for others—you stood up for me. And yeah, I know you blurted it out without thought, but you know what? That’s better than standing there thinking about it and deciding to say nothing. I can’t stay mad at you for that, Conner.”

Oh man, did his eyes light up like fireworks, big and bright, and his brilliant smile stretched his pale skin taut across his face. I hesitated, and then reached up to touch his cheek, right next to that smile, wanting to trace it with my finger but not daring to. He didn’t seem to have any reservations about reaching for me, though, locking his arm around me and pulling me close so he could press his face to my shoulder. Damn, it was nice that he was a little bit shorter. I slid my hand over his hair and stroked it, amazed at how soft it was, as my other arm went around him, holding him tight.

We stayed like that for a while, until I felt him sway and remembered what he’d said about not sleeping.

“Want me to drive you home before you pass out?”

My question just prompted him to cling tighter, a muffled “no” reaching my ears.

“You’re almost out on your feet,” I told him, like that wasn’t obvious.

He muttered something I couldn’t fully hear, so I pulled back from the hug, just enough to let me understand him. His eyes were closed, and I was pretty sure I was the only thing keeping him on his feet.

“Conner—hey, man, come on, you can’t sleep standing up and I can’t hold you up all night.”

“Can’t I stay here tonight, please?”

I hugged him, his plea reminding me of all those nights Rory had climbed into my bed. With Alexia there too, now, I wasn’t sure how this was gonna work, ’cause my bed was packed enough as it was.

“All right, but I, uhh, gotta warn you, Rory and Alexia kind of sleep in my bed, too.”