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“Dude, I don’t need to know any details. I saw the kiss and live in the house, and even though my room is at the other end of the hall, I can hear just fine. I’m on my fifth audiobook this week alone, and I’m pretty sure Noelle is sick of me stopping by her place too. I’ve ignored it as much as I could because I know you two need this time together. I just want to know everything is okay. I also want to know that you are going to tell her what really happened. She needs to know.”

His brow is raised, and I get it. He’s on my side, and he has been loyal and kept things between us.

I sigh. “I know, but I feel like we’re in a really good place right now. I just got her back, and I don’t know if I’m ready to bring it all back up.”

“I think you need to give Charlie more credit than that. She knows you. I think once you tell her what Britney did, it will really close that up, and you guys can move on without any secrets between you. You owe that to her and to yourself too. Look, you’re my best friend, but you keep things locked up tight. I don’t know if I fully understand why you didn’t tell her to begin with, but I know you don’t like talking about your feelings and shit.” He snorts.

He’s right. I don’t like talking about my feelings. Neither of them knows this, but I’ve spent years in counseling, trying to learn how to cope with things that happened to me before we moved to Troy. Casey and Charlie don’t know why we moved or why my mom isn’t in the picture. I know, someday, I’ll have to tell Charlie because I will be wifing her up and she’ll need to know. I can’t keep my secrets about my mom forever.

My current coping method is stuffing the pain of the past into a tiny little box in the back of my mind and ignoring it all so I don’t have to think about it. And I’ve been on an intentional hiatus from counseling because of football. I can’t focus on what I need to do on the field and alsofind my feelings. Not happening. I do make a point to check in with my therapist semi-regularly though; that’s actually what I was doing that day I ran into Charlie and Bo as she was looking for her psych class. I know he’s there when I really need to talk.

“I will talk to her eventually. We can’t go into this completely until she knows the truth. There are days I’m still just mad at myself for not fighting for us, but I promise, I’ll fix it all.”

I hold out my fist for Casey to bump. He is more than my best friend; he’s been like a brother to me. I won’t ever let him down. Loyalty and honesty are everything to me, and Casey is the real-deal, forever kind of friend. He doesn’t fully understand what he and his family have done for mine.

His parents know what went down with my mom and why we moved. They’ve never made me and Brooke feel like there was anything wrong with us because of it either. I don’t even know when my dad told them because they’ve always treated us the same. Like part of their family.

Right before Charlie and I broke up, it was a really rough time, and her mom helped me through it. My therapist said she was surprised I didn’t have more complex feelings toward women because of what my mom had done to me. But Carol? I knew she was a good egg from the minute I met her. She was the kind of mom that moms should be for their kids. Something I never had.

“I’m going to head home and shower there. Are you coming?” I ask Casey while I rip off the rest of my leg pads, then grab my sweats and pull them on.

“Dude, no. I can’t leave here without a shower, and you shouldn’t either. You smell like ass.” He laughs as he whips me with his towel.

I finish dressing and grab my wallet, keys, and bag from my cubby. “Ow, man. Honestly, I just want to get home so I can bang your sister before you all get back.” I bark out a laugh, then duck as Casey tries to whip me again, but closer to my face this time.

“You’d better run, motherfucker. I don’t need to know any of that!” Casey yells at me as I bolt toward the door.

I turn my head before I walk out and give him a wink, and he just laughs and mutters, “Fucker.”

When I get home, I see Charlie in the kitchen. She’s got a spoon in her hand, stirring something that I can’t see yet.

I drop my bag by the door, then come up behind her and wrap my hands around her waist. “Smells good in here. What are you doing, Boss?”

She squeals and puts a hand over her heart. “Jesus, Beck. You scared the shit out of me.” With her other hand, she pulls out an earbud. “I didn’t hear you come in. You’re just getting home? Where are the other guys?”

I skim my nose along her neck and place a kiss behind her ear. “They’re still at the field house, getting showered. I wanted to get home to you and see if I could steal a few minutes before they got back.”

“Yeah, before any of that happens, you need to shower. You stink!” She giggles.

“I was hoping you would join me. I’ll give you a little massage, rub you down … in all the right places,” I say, sliding my hands up and down her sides over her long T-shirt, making her shiver.

“Babe, while that sounds amazing, I think you need to focus on your own stink for now. Besides, I need to get the brownies in the oven. How about a rain check?” She turns her head and kisses me.

I mumble against her lips, “Are you sure? I can think of some ways to make you a little dirty.”

Reaching around her, I swipe my finger into the brownie batter. With my other hand still on her hip, I turn her around to face me. She’s so fucking sexy with her little smirk.

“Wanna have a taste?” I ask, then move my hand up to coat her slightly parted lips with the chocolate batter.

The tip of her tongue peeks out, and she touches it to the center of her top lip and then across her upper lip. When she starts to lick the bottom, I stop her.

“Uh-uh. It’s my turn.”

Leaning in, I take her bottom lip between mine and suck. When I pull back with her lip between my teeth, she moans, then grabs the back of my neck to pull me back into her.

Before she kisses me, she says, “Okay, but let’s make it quick. I would absolutely die if one of them walked in on us.”

I waste no time grabbing the hem of her shirt and pulling it off. She’s not wearing a bra, and her little shorts are giving me plenty of room to play.