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“To me, you are.” She smiled.
Things were getting heated between us, and I was too frightened to continue this type of conversation.
“I should go to my room now and let you get some sleep.” I sat up and placed my feet on the floor.
“Please don’t go. Just stay with me tonight. Please, Ethan.” She placed the palm of her hand firmly against my back.
I sat there, clenching my fist while I closed my eyes and took in a deep breath. I wanted to stay with her and feel her body wrapped around mine all night. But what if I had another nightmare?
“I know something is going on with you, and I know you had a nightmare last night. I don’t need to know what it was about. You don’t have to tell me. I just want you to stay.”
“You don’t understand, Aubrey. I don’t do this. I don’t stay. I fuck, and I get out. It’s best that way for both you and me.”
“So is that what we just did? We fucked? Because I know it was more than that. I felt it from you—in the way you touched me.”
“I do that to all the women I fuck. I’m sorry if you read anything more into it. It’s just sex, Aubrey. I’m a man, and I have needs. You’re a woman, and you can fulfill those needs. I can’t, nor will I ever give you anything more. I don’t have it in me.” I stood up and walked towards the door.
“My Aunt Charlotte was right about you,” she spoke. “And so was Ian when he told me that people call you ‘The Iceman.’ Now I understand why. But if you want my opinion, I think you’re hiding. You’re carefully guarding yourself because of Sophia.”
I whipped my head around and spoke in anger. “How the hell do you know about Sophia?”
“Your sister accidentally mentioned her. She didn’t mean to. It just slipped out. What happened to her, Ethan?”
“I don’t discuss that, and you are to never speak of her again. Do you understand me?” I spoke in a commanding and angered voice.
“No, actually, I don’t understand, and I’m not going to lie to you and say I do. We all lose the people we love, but life does and still has to go on.”
“Enough!” I shouted. “This discussion is over.” I walked out the door.
Chapter Eighteen
Aubrey
I lay there, naked and exposed on the bed, as he just walked out the door, leaving my heart broken. A perfect day turned bad because he was too afraid to get close to me. Getting up from the bed, I dressed in the clothes I wore to the party the other night. I needed my phone, but it was down in the kitchen where my purse was. Leaving was the best choice for both of us, and I wanted to get out of there as fast as I could. He'd hear me if I took the elevator, so I took the stairs, remembering that I was on the third floor. I counted the floors as I made my way down each set of staircases until I was on the garden level where the kitchen was. Feeling my way around, I placed my hands on the island where Ethan and I had just made love. I remembered setting my purse down on the table while I was waiting for him to pour me my glass of wine. Making my way to the table, I found it and placed it over my shoulder, and as I was making my way to the door, I heard Ethan’s voice behind me.
“Where are you going?”
“I’m going to stay with Penelope for the night.”
“Why?” he abruptly asked.
“Because I think after our last conversation, it’s for the best.”
“Why do you think it’s for the best? Because I told you it was just sex and nothing more to me? Seriously, Aubrey? We’ve known each other for what? A week and a half? Or is it because I won’t talk to you about something that’s extremely personal to me?”
“I’m done talking about this, Ethan, and you’re right. We’ve only known each other for a very short time, and I’m sorry that I let myself believe that maybe, just maybe, I meant a little something more to you than just a fuck buddy.”
Silence filled the space between us. Having this conversation with him was slowly tearing me apart, and I needed to leave because I refused to break down in front of him. Maybe the other women he had similar conversations with did just that, but I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of knowing that he broke me. The makeup session, the dress, the donuts, the coffee, and taking me to meet his parents made me feel like he saw me as something more. But I was wrong, and I would tuck my tail between my legs and quietly leave.
“I’m sorry, Aubrey.”
“I am too, Ethan.”
“At least let me drive you to Penelope’s.”
“No. I can get there on my own. I don’t need any more of your help.”
“Then, at least let me walk you out and hail you a cab.”