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The alcohol had definitely lowered his inhibitions. I wished I had the same excuse, but my body simply ached for his touch.
Steps sounded. My eyes widened in anxiety. Samuel quickly extracted his fingers from under my skirt, pushed them into his mouth to lick them clean, and straightened just when Ines appeared behind the window and raised four thick photo albums with a delighted expression on her face.
I quickly excused myself to the bathroom to freshen up before I returned to the living room. Danilo, Samuel, and Pietro were already tasting some expensive port.
Samuel’s eyes locked on mine, and a new wave of heat rushed through my body. I tore my gaze away as I moved toward Sofia and Ines, who sat at the coffee table with one of the photo albums open in front of them.
The men quickly excused themselves to Pietro’s office, obviously not in the mood to take a stroll down memory lane. It was quite late when Samuel decided it was time to head home, and that was when the atmosphere became uncomfortable.
“Can one of your men drive Sofia and me to our hotel?” Danilo asked Pietro. “I don’t drink and drive since Emma’s accident.”
Pietro nodded. “That seems wise.”
Danilo sent Samuel a hard look. “What about you? I’m sure your father can also spare another man to drive you home.”
Samuel narrowed his eyes at my brother.
“You could spend the night here,” Ines said with a disarming smile at Samuel. “Then we could spend Christmas morning together.”
We were invited for lunch anyway. “That sounds wonderful,” I said quickly. I didn’t want to stab Samuel in the back by expressing my unease of having him drive us home in his state. He didn’t have any outward signs of being drunk, but I doubted the men had held back while they chatted in Pietro’s office. Samuel was confident in his abilities, but I didn’t want to tempt fate, not after my accident.
“Your present is at our house,” Samuel said.
“We can exchange presents later. I don’t mind.”
Samuel looked into my eyes for a while, then gave a terse nod. “Why not?”
Danilo gave me a small nod, obviously pleased with the outcome. I sent him a warning look. A comment from him might provoke Samuel again.
When Samuel and I lay in bed a short while later in the dark, he murmured, “You trust your brother’s judgment more than mine.”
I tensed. He was pressed up behind my back, and in the dark, I wouldn’t have had a chance to make out his expression anyway. “I trust you,” I said. “But I don’t trust the alcohol, especially not when it comes to driving. A drunk driver almost killed me, Samuel.”
“I know,” Samuel rumbled, then pressed a kiss to my neck. “That’s why I agreed to spend the night here.”
When I entered the ballet studio in my tutu, I immediately relaxed despite my previous tension. Samuel and I had had an argument in the morning because I’d found him in his office again. He had fallen asleep at his desk with a half-empty bottle of liquor beside him. For the first couple of weeks after Christmas, it had seemed like he was drinking much less, but maybe he’d simply gotten better at hiding it from me. The thought worried me tremendously. I touched the gold necklace of an origami crane that Samuel had given me for Christmas and took a deep breath.
Dancing had become my new reprieve. In the past, it had been a source of pressure and anxiety for me, so I’d never missed it as much as I thought I would, but now freed of expectations, I had rediscovered my love for ballet.
Our dance teacher and Albert were already there and caught up in a conversation. Leo sank down on the bench in the hallway, right in front of the door to the studio as he’d done the last few times. By now, everyone had grown used to him being there, and I didn’t feel like an alien among them anymore.
Albert smiled when he spotted me and waved me over to him and Natalya. “Natalya and I think we should try a lifting figure today. You are a natural, and it would be amazing.”
My eyes grew wide with surprise. In the past, lifts had always been my favorite, giving me a sense of freedom.
“What do you think?” Natalya asked, pushing one hand into her waist, her fingers tapping against her belly.
Usually, I would have said no. A lift always meant more closeness than other dance figures, and I had a feeling Samuel wouldn’t like that, considering his jealous reactions before. For a Made Man, jealousy was a matter of outward appearances and showing their dominance, not love. But Albert was so obviously not interested in me and women in general that I doubted even the most possessive man would find fault in a lifting figure. “Uhhh. We could try.”
“Wonderful!” Albert touched my shoulder, looking giddy like a child. I stifled a smile at his excitement. It was obvious that ballet was his absolute passion. The other dancers filed in, greeting me with honest smiles. I was so glad that I had found a place among them despite my notorious background.
Natalya clapped her hands. “Time to begin. Today, we’re working on a few new moves.”
After a warm-up, Natalya explained to everyone what she expected of them. I was nervous about our lift as it required me to push halfway out of my wheelchair in a fluid motion so Albert could pick me up, then raise me and twirl me around.
The first take went completely wrong. I pushed up too quickly, and Albert couldn’t grab my waist properly, so I plopped back into the wheelchair with enough force to make it shake violently.
Leo rose from the bench, but I quickly shook my head. Even if I fell, that was part of the process. I didn’t want him to intervene and remind my fellow dancers of my otherness.