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He pointed a finger back at me. “Ha! So you finally admit she’s your friend.”

I gave him a withering look. “I went toa templeto look for her. Ya know how I hate those places. They make me want to run naked through them while shouting obscenities. Ya’re both lucky I could fight those urges to do what was right. And worst of all, I went there to ask her aboutyer love life. It was all kinds of awful to have to listen to her tell me how amazing ya were between the sheets.”

Conn’s happy male laughter rang out through the trees. A smile lit my face. Goddess, I didn’t care about keeping our contract as much as I cared about keeping Conn in my life. I was a blessed woman and a lucky, lucky witch.

“I’m really glad I didn’t die the other day, Conn. The Dagda stone did me a solid saving my life.”

“I’m glad too,” Conn said. “But I still don’t trust that artifact. Not all of The Dagda’s ideas were good ones, Aran. He made mistakes too.”

“If I’d been him, I would have spared their lives as well. One of The Three can be a bastard at times, but he’s saved me twice now.”

“Perhaps that’s a truth I’m still struggling with. Saving you was always my job. I might be a little jealous of the beings in the stone.”

“Well, as often as I face death, I need all the saviors I can get.”

“Which probably explains why you let the guardian keep hanging around.”

“Probably,” I said with a giggle. “Rasmus makes me suffer as often as he saves me. With him, it’s always a guess about whether he has my back or his brethren’s. I tell myself it’s not a big deal with him because I count more on you and the Dagda stone. I could have died from sheer shock when Rasmus chased after the bowman who shot me.”

“Yes. That surprised me as well. Usually, he opts to stay with you,” Conn said.

I snorted. “That’s not what I mean. He chased the bad guy down and smoothed things over. Not a single person was harmed in the process other than me. What would Rasmus have done if I’d died while he was gone? Would he have punished them then?”

“He’s a dangerous and powerful being, Aran. It is a good thing he’s reluctant to use his power to punish. It took me centuries to learn his level of control.”

“Yeah, I suppose ya have a point,” I said begrudgingly, not liking the reluctance in my voice.

“Do you need him to kill your enemies to prove his love?” Conn asked.

Did I? That was an intriguing question. I wasn’t sure I wanted to know the answer, so I shrugged.

Conn continued with his argument. “Rasmus is a pacifist. Sure, his kind will carry out a planned apocalypse to correct a planetary-wide mistake, but killing an individual is not their default setting. Their neutrality results from spending eons watching humans struggle to control themselves. Even knowing humans incarnate again and again, the guardians spare people whenever they can. That’s a positive, Aran.”

I glared at Conn. “Ya’re making me feel guilty about my bloodthirsty tendencies.”

“That’s not my intention. I simply think you need to let your eagle be an eagle. Stop trying to turn him into your parrot. The guardian will never think the same as you. Why do you think they erase their memories to spend time here? Being involved with a full guardian will always send you to me, Mulan, and others for help in taking out those you want to kill. But that doesn’t mean you can’t still enjoy Rasmus being in your life. He’s already said he wouldn’t stop you from doing what you felt was right. That is undoubtedly the highest concession he can give you.”

"When did you start being the guardian's biggest fan?"

Conn held her gaze. “When he flew after the bowman. He trusted me to take care of you and went to make sure it never happened again. That wasn’t neutral of him. And he did the best he could to protect you. I completely understand the difficulty of his decision. If I didn’t, I would have quietly murdered Jack when he left you and Fiona two weeks after she was born. You would have gotten over him, and Fiona would never have known him. I still think not killing him was one of my biggest mistakes. I could have you so much hurt.”

I blinked at Conn. “But I loved Jack back then.”

Conn smirked a little. “Yes. You did.But I always knew Jack was a proper bastard.Sometimes, in life, there is no good decision to make. There is just a decision you’re willing to live with. Rasmus has those moments as well. He doesn’t exist just to make you angry.”

Conn’s lecture about Rasmus hurt my head but also resonated as the truth. I suppose that was why all I could do was nod.

Chapter Nine

The dangerous and powerful being Conn lectured me about was currently snoring in my bed. Rasmus sprawled among the bedcovers, temporarily sated.

Or at least I hoped that was the case. I’d given it my best effort and walked away from the snoring guardian with a smile on my face.

My mind couldn't rest. It kept going back to Ben's problem. That was why I was sneaking out of bed instead of being curled around him.

Glancing at my handsome, naked guardian one last time, I headed to the library to retrieve a book on animal shifters Dylan had borrowed. A flurry of texts between the far darrig and me had hinted that it was likely on the desk Conn and Dylan both used.

I giggled when I caught myself humming as I walked. Then I spied Dylan hovering outside the library with a female demon who looked no older than Fiona. Being a demon, she was likely hundreds of years old, if not thousands. It was the absolute attention Dylan paid her that had me grinning. He was in his tall, blond human form. I suddenly wondered if she understood it was not his real one or if she cared. I well knew ya couldn’tjudge other species by human tendencies, not even when they took human form.