Page 50 of You Chive Me Crazy

“And did she forgive you?”

I sighed. “Yes.”

“Ha!” he said. “See? Am I a genius or what?”

“More like a wise guy,” I said, chuckling.

“What about Damian?” Rolando asked. “Is he being an ass?”

“Would you expect anything less from him?”

“Well, don’t worry, I’ve got a plan that is going to shut him up once and for all. I’ve got an even bigger surprise for you.”

I hesitated. “What kind of surprise?”

“You’ll find out soon enough!” He laughed and disconnected the call.

I couldn’t help smiling at that.

Rolando always had a flair for the dramatic.

I stood to go wake up Zoe, but then stopped in my tracks.

Damian appeared from around the corner and leaned against the porch railing, a toothpick and cocky grin hanging out of his mouth.

“Sucha shame,” he said, stepping too close for comfort.

“What is?” I asked, wincing. “That you’ve been eating garbage again?”

“Cram it. I’m talking about Rolando getting fired,” Damian said. “Maybe we’ll all get lucky and you’ll be next. The world would be a better place, wouldn’t it?”

He was trying to push my buttons, but I wasn’t a river trout who would take the bait. Any conversation with him was just a waste of my breath. I tried to walk toward the door to go inside, but I didn’t get far.

Damian blocked my path and crossed his arms, his huge biceps straining the seams of his sleeves. “Do you think you’re too good to talk to me?”

Yes. Yes, I do.

“I think I finally understand what’s going on here,” I said. “You have a little bit of a crush on me, don't you?”

“Bite me, Lucas.”

“Sounds like more than a crush with an invitation like that.” I sighed and defaulted to my calm self. “What do you want, Damian? I’ve got things to do, and you’ve got bleach to gargle.”

“I want to know what you have to say about this!” he said, jamming his phone in my face to show me a picture.

It was the selfie Savannah had taken of us in front of the coffee shop. Unbeknownst to me, she had posted it on Instagram and tagged me with the caption, “Coffee with the famous Lucas Filo.” The post was very popular based on the engagement, but the main plus about the picture was that it was irritating Damian.

“Savannah looks so cute.” I pretended to analyze the photo, nodding my head. “The awning in the background really brings out the color in her eyes.”

“Cut the crap,” Damian scowled. “What were you doing having coffee with my woman?”

“Your woman?” I said, not too surprised he’d called her that since the man was a well-known philanderer. “Seeing her a few times does not equal a girlfriend. And it’s awfully sad you think you own her. What an insult for such a nice person.”

He took a half-step closer. “We’re dating, which means I make the rules. Period.”

You’re an idiot. Period.

Damian was almost twice my size and probably wanted to wipe up the porch with my body. I was choosing to be civil and non-confrontational. Besides, this was Betsy’s livelihood, and the last thing she needed was a fight on her front porch that made national headlines because I was a public figure.