Page 117 of X's and O's

She smiled happily, and then to my surprise, leaned in to kiss my cheek. “Thank you.”

I didn’t know how I was going to pay Dax. I already owed him for the tattoo machine, but it didn’t matter.

The look on Violet’s face was priceless.

29

VIOLET

Dax let us take his chain, and I wobble-rode my new bike down the street to the Dead End Diner while Levi walked beside me. We locked it up against a pole out front, the smell of burgers and French fries wafting out through the open door. Inside, Levi and I sat side by side at a table covered in a faded flowered cloth.

I couldn’t keep the stupid grin off my face.

“Happy looks good on you,” he said quietly, picking up a menu.

“This is what I normally look like. You just wouldn’t know that because you were too busy being an asshole.”

I hadn’t meant for it to come out like that. So sharp and snippy. We’d been having a nice time. And I was so grateful to him for buying me the bike. It would make a huge difference in my ability to get around town in between jobs. The bus sucked, and Ubers or taxis ate into my paycheck in a way I couldn’t afford to do except in dire situations. A bike would solve so many of myproblems. I could already imagine how much safer I would feel, whizzing by the gangs that hung around in dark Saint View streets, lurking in the shadows. I’d been lucky so far, but I already knew that luck wouldn’t last forever and walking alone around here, especially at night, was dangerous.

The bike meant a lot.

But clearly, at my core, I was still so mad at Levi, and that anger needed somewhere to go.

He put the greasy, laminated menu down. “That was never about you, Violet. You have to know that. I didn’t see you that night and just go, no, not for me.” He shook his head. “It was the complete fucking opposite. All I wanted to do was sweep you into my arms and kiss you.”

I couldn’t help the snort of derision. “You had a funny way of showing it.”

He prickled. “I’d spent twelve months thinking about meeting you. And in every single one of those daydreams, I stood in front of you, a man I could be proud of. One with a job. A home. Sure, one who’d been sent to prison, but one who’d done his time and paid his dues.”

“I didn’t care about any of those things.”

His green eyes blazed. “But I did, Vi. I felt like a piece of shit, standing there on those bluffs, not even half of what I’d promised you. So me rejecting you…it was only because I knew I wasn’t enough.”

I sighed. “And now? Has anything actually changed?”

He shook his head. “I still don’t have a job. A house.”

My shoulders fell. “Then what are you even doing here, Levi? If those things are so important to you. Because this just feels like you’re torturing me. You’re here, but I can’t have you. You’re here, but you aren’t goodenough. What are you actually asking me for? Is this all because I’m seeing other people?”

He scrubbed his hands over his face wearily, but when he lifted his eyes again, there was a little more clarity. “I know you’re with Whip. Or X. Or fuck, I don’t know, maybe you’re with both.”

I narrowed my eyes at him. “And that’s a problem how?”

His eyes were tortured, a battle playing out behind them. “I want to say I’m fine with them touching you, but we both know I’d be lying. I lost it when I saw Whip’s hands on you the other night.”

“Why though?”

“Because I wanted them to be mine.”

Our gazes collided. He swore low under his breath. “I wanted that so fucking bad. And I know it makes me a thug. But I don’t even care.” His gaze burned through mine. “You wanted my hands on you, that night up at the bluff.”

My brain shouted at me to lie, that this man was only going to hurt me, just like he’d done in the past. But I couldn’t. “Yes.”

“All the times we were writing letters, you thought about me touching you.”

“Yes.”

“About how good I could make you feel, Vi. My fingers on your skin. Drifting over your curves, moving between your thighs.”