Page 55 of WitchCurse

Toby wrapped an arm around Nick’s waist, gaze golden as he peered over Nick’s shoulder, teeth more beast than human in his snarling smile. The two of them beautiful together, and neither needed me in that moment.

“We do,” Nick corrected. He turned his head to meet a kiss, open mouthed, an exchange of tongues and heat with Toby. Nick was still hard, his body carved in fine lines of muscle and flesh. I could have reached out, but I stood frozen, conflicted, and on the edge of panic. He broke the kiss to look at me, assessing, as Toby wrapped himself around him.

Whatever this was, I wasn’t ready. I turned toward the door.

Nick reached for me. “Don’t go.”

But I needed to get away. I clamped down on my shields, building wall after wall between them, and this time the barriers felt tangible. Would it be enough to keep them out of my head? I hoped to sort through the chaos myself.

“I need some air.” A mortal concept, air clearing the head, as mostly it was distance I required. They looked lovely together, and I’d never deny them that, but the idea that Nick had used my desire to try to break the monster out, both frightened and angered me. How long would it take for me to submit? What then? All of us dead?

Prophecies foretold of the destruction of worlds, the fae had blamed me, imprisoned me, locked me in a thousand invisible chains to keep the power banished in the darkness. Then Sebastian had stolen all they’d carefully tried to protect. The prophecy or merely part of it? Or had they meant my final transformation and the end of this world as well?

I kept the rage buried deep, our bond locked tight against them, recalling many days at court in ages past and hiding the monster inside. Multifaceted was the kitsune spirit. I could be life or death, destruction or creation, rage or safety. Nick had encountered them all from time to time, attacks on the sanctuary forcing my hand, but even those occurrences were from a well of magic long starved, faded, and beaten into submission. This new rise of power, a gift in part from the omega, awakened something deep within, a hunger for more. The urge to run free, explore the stretch of strength carved its own will in my gut. I backed away.

Nick’s expression resigned, and sad. I hated to see that on his face, but I wasn’t ready for whatever this was. I didn’t even know what this way. I just needed to breathe. I headed for the door in need of a shower, some warmth, and time to think. Away from them, the manipulation, and an attempt to take what I wasn’t willing to give.

I would never force you…Nick whispered through my mind, a tentative touch as if he were afraid to come closer, the barrier keeping him on the edge of my awareness but out of my head. I sensed his hurt; did he feel my anger? That last barrier would remain until there was nothing left of me.

CHAPTER19

Nick

“What was that?” Toby demanded as Kiran vanished into the other part of the camper. I could feel his panic even though he tried to clamp down on it.

“You’re as much to blame as I am,” I scowled, shoving him away.

The wolf was too close to the surface. Mingling with Toby’s human side as his demand to claim became overwhelming. I watched him struggle to hold back, and keep himself from following Kiran. If he followed now, it would become a game, a hunt, and that would be disastrous.

Of course, none of that mattered in the face of my own screw up. After talking with Toby about the dark pieces of magic earlier, I thought maybe it was a way I could be useful. My own well of rage, buried deep, kept me moving, what was a little more? I reached for my clothes, tugging everything back into place, heart still racing, dick not calming down either. Fuck, I’d almost had everything I had wanted for forever.

“Bad timing,” I thought. Should have waited. I had thought reaching for that darkness when he was clouded with healing and pleasure would ease his anxiety over letting me take it. But I had underestimated his resolve. Stupid, as it wasn’t like I hadn’t studied him for two centuries.

“Ya think?” Toby snarled, then looked down, gripping the bedding and having to visibly work to not tear everything apart. I kept a careful distance, even leaving space in the bond rather than reaching into his mind. I knew he was warring with the wolf. The wolf demanded to claim us, and finish whatever the blood magic required to make us his mates and his pack. The human side wanted us, but knew caution was necessary, especially with Kiran.

“He’s not fragile,” Toby muttered. “Not really.”

“No, not physically at least,” I agreed, listening as the water turned on, but keeping out of Kiran’s head. He needed time to think. Restoring his body to mostly functional was huge, and a win in my opinion, even if it meant I still had a long way to go before gaining a more intimate relationship with him. But I also understood how overwhelming it had to be to feeleverything. “They had him bound up in chains his entire life. Curse after curse tying him in knots until even his body began to die. Imagine being numb to everything, and suddenly you can feel the wind again? A caress on your skin? And it’s been so long since you felt anything that the only memories you have of being touched, are pain…”

Toby deflated, the wolf stepping back from the fight. “I tried not to be aggressive,” he said after a minute, still not looking at me. “Backed off when you asked me to.”

I knew how hard that had been, his wolf demanding otherwise, but he’d let me take the lead. My mistake was touching the darkness. “We both fucked up. I need to understand what that is,” I said. “The barrier and the darkness. It feels like rage for him too, only wilder? It doesn’t feel that way for you?”

“No, cold, sort of lifeless, like theHunt, a sort of finality,” Toby said. “He’s a son of the ice queen, maybe it’s part of her magic? Kitsunes are supposed to be fire, or is that all legend? Her magic is cold. Maybe they can’t mix?”

I thought about that for a moment, but that didn’t make sense. Kiran was the first kitsune, a sidhe fae born with earthen blood, he’d been fire and warmth, light as the wind as a youth. His memories vividly about life and growth, not death and the cold. Was it all a lie? Was the ice queen really his mother? Kiran thought of her that way, but his memories of her were broken and scattered. Had anyone ever told him she was his mother? Or was it an assumed lie? Had he been taken from the other court? He was obviously sidhe blood, his level of magic, and general appearance matched the high court fae, even after his skin had darkened,warmed, I thought. He wasn’t really gray in unblighted form, but a golden dark bronze like a sunny beach. Not as dark as Sebastian, but they were both foxes, and in the broken memories of his childhood, Kiran had red hair.

Was it all a lie? The fae weren’t supposed to be able to lie. But the omission of the truth was one way the fae often skirted that rule. “Fuck,” I said, using one of Sebastian’s favorite curses. “I don’t think he’s winter court at all.”

“You think he’s light court?” Toby asked.

“Sebastian makes things grow, right? When his power is working right, he’s life, warmth, and summer.”

Toby nodded. “Yes. When Kiran first entered my mind when I was dying, he was the one who brought warmth and sun. Chased away the clouds and the ice. Like the first spring thaw. But that’s inside my head, and I’m a little crazy.”

“Not crazy. You perceive things differently, and that might benefit us in understanding all this mess,” I said and pulled him close to kiss him. He accepted, sinking into my touch, the wolf calming. It was a temporary reprieve, but unless we wanted Kiran retreating permanently, we needed to walk carefully with him.

“I plan to seduce him,” Toby said, hands running down my chest.