Page 22 of What He Never Knew

But I didn’t make it two steps before I was stopped.

“Reese Walker,” a smooth, familiar voice said as a warm hand grazed my arm. “Well, well. Fancy meeting you here.”

Jennifer Stinson smiled back at me, in almost the same way she had the first night we’d met. That had been in my first couple of months back in Mount Lebanon, and she’d asked for a dance at Charlie’s parents’ annual fundraiser. Of course, Charlie had been all I could see that night.

Not that much had really changed.

Jennifer still had the same, sultry blue eyes and thick lips — the bottom one with an indent that I was sure drove every man she talked to absolutely insane — and her long, curly blonde hair waterfalled down her back as she stepped closer. Her perfume was tangy and sweet, like a citrusy fruit, and I wished I could be a normal man for once. I wished I could be the man I wasbeforeI came back to Mount Lebanon, before my family died, before everything inside of me capable of love or lust was completely obliterated by Hurricane Charlie.

But I felt nothing.

“Nice to see you again, Jennifer. It’s been a long time.”

“Indeed, it has,” she said, her eyes crawling their way back up to my face. “I know you’re working now, but are you free later this week? I’d love to grab a drink, catch up.”

I swallowed down the sticky knot in my throat, the same one that emerged any time I thought of a situation even remotely close to a date. “I’m pretty busy with school and evening lessons right now,” I tried. “But maybe once the semester finishes.”

“I’m going to hold you to that,” she said, not fazed in the slightest by my dodge. She held out her hand, red lips curling into a smile. “Phone?”

I cleared my throat, so desperate for a cigarette now that I shoved my phone into her hand. She typed out her number, saved it, and handed it back to me.

“Talk to you soon, Reese Walker.”

With that, she winked, slowly and purposefully swinging her hips as she made her way back to her table.

I just blew out a long breath, picking up my pace toward the kitchen. And I was almost there, almost through that swinging door when my path was blocked again.

By the one person I was trying to avoid.

“Hey, you,” Charlie beamed, her cheeks pink like she’d just been walking in the snow when it was nearly eighty degrees outside. She held a smiling Daisy on her hip, and my heart squeezed painfully in my chest at the sight of them together.

At the sight of what could have been mine.

“I know you’re on break, but I just wanted to bring Daisy over. She’s been trying to wiggle out of my lap all evening to come say hi to you.”

Charlie grinned down at Daisy, who was holding out two chubby hands toward me. And I loved that kid, I did — but now when I looked at her, I saw Cameron’s eyes instead of my own. I saw the child who brought the woman I loved so much joy, and me so much pain, and I felt like shit that I couldn’t be happy to see her.

It was my own fault, as much as I wanted to blame Charlie for the pain I felt in my chest while looking at her daughter. I had been the one to go to Cameron, to ask to be a part of their life after everything that had happened. Maybe, back then, I thought it would be easier. Maybe I thought the pain of being around them was better than being without them entirely.

But the biggest driving motivator was that I thought that little girl was mine. And now that I knew she wasn’t, it killed me to see her.

“Hey there, pretty girl,” I said, letting Daisy take my thick finger in her hand. I couldn’t help but smile then, and she rattled off something that sounded almost like my name as my eyes floated back to her mother. “I thought you guys had family dinner at the house tonight.”

Charlie smiled. “Yeah, so did I. But when I told them you were working and couldn’t make it, Dad booked a reservation here. They miss you,” she said, and then her smile slipped a little. “We all do.”

Daisy freed my finger, and I tucked my hands in the pockets of my slacks, clearing my throat with my eyes on the kitchen door behind Charlie. If I didn’t get a fucking cigarette in my mouth within the next two minutes, I was going to flip tables.

“I’ll come over and say hello after my set,” I said. “But, I just have a short break now, so, if you’ll excuse me.”

I nodded toward the door, and Charlie looked over her shoulder before moving out of the way. “Oh, of course. I’m sorry. I should have waited.”

“It’s alright. I’ll talk to you in a little bit, okay?”

I didn’t hold my smile or wait for her to respond before I shoved through the kitchen door, weaving my way through the mess of chefs and bussers on my way to the back. One of the sous chefs, Ronaldo, tossed me his pack of cigarettes and lighter as I passed, already well accustomed to my break times. And as soon as the warm, spring air hit my face, I lit one up, letting out a long sigh of relief after the first inhale of nicotine.

I closed my eyes, letting the cigarette dangle between my lips before puffing on it again. Each new inhale calmed my breathing, but my chest was still tight, Charlie’s eyes still fresh in my mind. I tried to focus on the warm night air, on the high of the nicotine, on literally anything else.

It was like trying not to smell the delicious scent of the gourmet food wafting out from the kitchen.