Page 55 of What Did I Miss?

Charged with adrenaline, Makayla lunges towards the ladder. It grates against the eaves as she drags it up. She underestimates its weight, and falls backwards as she pulls it up over the edge. She rides the bumpy slope, catching onto a tile just in time. Her Doc Martens dangle over the edge.

‘Makayla!’ Beau breaks free and positions himself directly below her, arms out wide.

‘I’m okay.’ Heart racing like Phar Lap, she doesn’t believe a word of it. Her life flashed before her eyes and two regrets immediately popped into her mind:

Being too chicken to tell Beau how she felt sooner.

Not buying a Ned Kelly pie from the bakery yesterday.

Despite the relentless churning in her stomach, she has to do this. Makayla focuses on her reason for performing this stunt in the first place and uses that to steady herself.

‘I’m calling the fire brigade,’ Jeffrey announces, waving his mobile around like it’s a grenade.

Agnes moves like a ninja and plucks the iPhone from his hand. ‘Go back to your office and do what you do best, Jeffrey – nothing.’ She gives Makayla an encouraging thumbs up. Who would’ve guessed they’d be on the same team one day?

Makayla starts, but the crowd is restless, and their chatter drowns her out. Beau points to his ear to signal he can’t hear.

‘Oi, quiet!’ Ebony shouts, and that’s all it takes to scare the students into silence. She swishes her plum-dyed ponytail over her shoulder and flashes a toothy grin at her coordinator. ‘Do your thing.’

Nerves scratch Makayla’s throat. This would be easier if Beau was the only witness to this conversation, and not a sea of teenagers. She’ll never live this down; the internet won’t let her. Bad luck. It’s worth it.

Shaky inhale. Calm exhale.

‘After my divorce, I wrote a list of things I missed out on because I married young. That’s right, kids, take it from me, don’t marry your high-school sweetheart. Anyway, is Cece here?’

‘Present!’ Cece’s hand shoots up faster than a straight-A student.

‘I want to add one more thing to the list.’

‘I don’t have it on me,’ Cece says in an unnecessary stage whisper.

‘I know. We’re doing a bit. Work with me.’

Stepping into character, Cece wiggles a purple notepad. ‘Ready when you are. Hold that thought. Pen? Does anyone have a pen? Anyone?’

‘Please take your time. I might plunge to my death. Whatevs.’ Makayla shrugs apologetically at Beau. ‘We didn’t rehearse this.’

‘I can tell.’ He laughs. There it is. A hearty chuckle she never thought she’d hear again.

‘Got one. All righty, let’s go.’ The level of concentration on Cece’s face is unbeatable.

‘I want you to add, Face my fears .’

Cece mouths the words as she scribbles them.

‘You might as well put a tick next to it, because I’m about to do it.’

‘Check.’ Cece exaggerates the flick at the end.

‘Okay, Beau.’ Makayla draws in an icy breath. ‘There’s something I need to get off my chest.’ The words stick to the tip of her tongue, and she unconsciously paces to set them free. Roof tiles clank beneath her heavy footsteps and the onlookers gasp.

‘Why don’t we discuss this at a safer height? My preference is ground level.’ He hovers below, ready to catch her.

Makayla ignores the suggestion and centres herself.

‘You came out of nowhere, and no matter how much I tried to not think about you, or want you, I did. My biggest fear isn’t heights.

It’s feeling the same crushing pain I did when Eddie died.

Being alone felt like the safest option.

’ The sentences pour out along with the tears.

‘I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about the car.

You were right. I originally wanted it to punish Warren, but I promise you that’s not the case anymore.

The car and my list were roadblocks I put in between us.

I was scared to stand on the edge, but now I’m ready to fall because I know you’ll catch me.

’ She stretches her arms out wide, reminiscent of the angel wings tattooed across her wrist.

‘You’re not actually going to jump, are you?’ Beau chokes out.

‘Hell no. I meant metaphorically.’ She inches back from the edge to put him at ease. ‘Also, I realised something recently – I don’t need you to catch me. Don’t get me wrong, it’d be great if you did, but I have to save myself. And I will. The only cure for grief is to grieve.’

A knowing smile finds its way to his lips as she repeats his words back to him. When the time’s right, she’ll tell him what happened with Warren and Quinn, and at her meetings. But that will have to wait until later, because there’s something important she needs to say.

‘The reason I climbed onto this roof is to tell the whole world’ – she creates a megaphone with her hands – ‘I LOVE BEAU SHEPHERD!’

A wave of euphoria soars through Makayla’s body, spilling to her fingertips and toes.

It bubbles at her skin’s surface, and overcome with delight, she giggles like she’s never giggled before.

She’s not afraid or embarrassed. There’s no need to be.

Her loyal audience rewards the performance with a round of applause.

While it’s kind of them not to laugh at her, the only reaction she cares about is Beau’s, and it’s hard to gauge through her tears.

Makayla slides the ladder back into place, hoping Beau understands that’s his cue. Rongo and Cece hold it steady. Patting his back in encouragement, they send Romeo up. Beau ascends quickly and hurls himself onto the roof.

Eyes swimming with love, he pulls her towards his warm body.

They bump noses, tilt their heads the other way and collide again.

Laughter follows. She keeps her head perfectly still and lets his lips find hers.

They’ve still got sugar on them from his morning tea doughnut.

Makayla kisses him deeply, starving for his touch. She never wants to be without it again.

‘Okay, folks. Let’s give the oldies some privacy.’ Ebony rounds up her peers like sheep, driving them into classrooms.

‘I love you,’ Makayla says, pleased at how easily it comes out. She feels like she could say it a thousand times a day and never tire of it.

‘Finally,’ he breathes, relaxing into the hold.

‘What happens next?’ she asks.

‘Should we look at caravans?’ Beau replies, half joking, half serious.

‘Absolutely. No more detours, though.’ She winks.

They sink into each other’s arms, with adventures on the horizon. Who knows where the road will lead them? The only thing Makayla’s certain of is that they’ll travel it together.