Page 22 of Waters that Drown Us
She whines as her hips buck forward, and I tuck her reaction to praise in my pocket for later as I resume eating her, sucking on her clit and letting her find a pace she enjoys as she rides my face.
I hate that it’s never been like this before. I hate that every moment of her pleasure and mine is built on lies and manipulation. But even more, I hate that I can’t stop myself from swinging her thigh over my shoulder and reaching down to unbutton my own pants.
“Are you…” she stutters, the words choked off as I flatten my tongue directly on her clit for a moment. “Christ, are you touching yourself while you’re…damn it, I don’t know the term in English.”
We both laugh, the sensation oddly perfect among all this tension and lust, and I slide my fingers against my own clit as I pull away from hers.
“The Americans call iteating out,” I chuckle, and she shakes with her own laugh before I return to my work.
The build is a bit slower, but it somehow feels more connected, with my pleasure ratcheting up alongside hers. She doesn't hide her noises now, releasing gasps and sighs and whines that leave me rocking my clit against the heel of my palm with two fingers inside me. I grip her thigh over my shoulder for balance and move both of us to the rhythm she sets as she grinds against my face.
I can’t wait to give her more. To see her take my fingers, to watch her grind against me while she's under my body, towitness her take toys until she's come in every manner I can think of. But right now, watching her fall apart from the feeling of my mouth against her…I’ll never get over this.
“Emily,” she cries, her hips grinding down harder against my face. I want to tell her I’m close too, but I’d rather die than move my mouth from where it is right now, so I squeeze her leg and increase the pressure on both our clits. Her movements become hurried and uneven, and I feel myself fall the moment before she does.
Coming with her, feeling her body break while it’s connected with mine, is indescribable. I groan into her skin as she rides out her pleasure on my face, drawing my orgasm out longer than I would alone, so desperate for the moment not to end.
Finally, we’re both spent. Alice leans all the way back against the console, her arms at odd angles to avoid the controls. I stand up and rebutton my pants, wiping the evidence of Alice’s orgasm off my mouth with the back of my hand. She watches like she can’t believe what she’s seeing as I lick it clean, not wasting a drop of what she gave me.
She’s nearly naked, save for her socks and tennis shoes. Her skin is turning pink under the glaring sun, either from its rays of the glow of her pleasure. But she looks over her shoulder, and the first thing she says to me…
“The whales are gone.”
Chapter 11
Alice
Ithink I might be a bad person.
Most of my life, I was so sheltered from the world and my impact on it, it never occurred to me to contemplate my morality. I didn’t even wonder if my father’s work was right or wrong, even as I learned more about it in my teen years. This was just the way the world was, and I played my part in it. After that night with Ilya, when I realized I needed to escape, I was too focused on survival to consider if the scales would balance in my favor. I saw myself as a victim, someone who these things were happeningtoinstead of a willing actor in a system of which I was finally experiencing the consequences.
Perhaps that should have been my first sign that I wasn’t good. I thought of myself as helpless, and didn’t consider the impact of my life and actions on the world until someone I cared about was on the receiving end of my karma.
But now I know where I stand. Because I know it’s wrong to keep sleeping with Emily. I recognize that it puts this innocent, oblivious, brilliant woman in more danger. I understand that with each passing day I spend letting her teach me what I’ve been missing, I harden the seal on her death certificate.
But that doesn’t seem to stop me from crawling back to her bed every day this week.
On the research days, we took the boat out to the coordinates she gave me, set up the ROV, and tried to remember to watch the monitor for hours at a time. On whale watch days, every second I wasn’t on the catamaran, I spent with her.
I still haven’t kissed her, even though it’s all I want to do. I considered taking the capsule out while I’m at work, but I can’t predict when Ilya will show up. It has to be soon. As much as my uncle cared for me, I’m certain my father would only grant him the mercy of death once he handed over the information he needed. Whatever Mikhail told him, coupled with the carefully placed hints I’ve left over the past few months, I know my time is short. Ilya could steal me from my apartment, or off the street, or in the damn discount store. The only place I feel safe is on the water, and I can’t exactly explain removing a capsule of poison from my mouth to Emily. I have to keep it on my body at all times, so at the first opportunity, I can give Ilya exactly the end he deserves.
“Alice!”
I snap my head up, whipping around to find Alan holding a mop out to me. Once again, I was daydreaming about Emily’s fingers in my…
“Are you going to help us clean or do you want to be here all night?” he scoffs, rolling his eyes at me. IfAlanis complaining about my work ethic, I know it’s gotten really bad.
“Yeah, sorry,” I mutter, grabbing the mop from him and shuffling to the bathroom. It’s the last cruise of the week, and on each one before this I’ve been wholly distracted. I’m actually thankful that we’ve sold zero tickets for our Monday cruises. No trips mean no pay, but it also means I get a whole day off, which I haven’t had since Emily’s research trips began.
I should take the opportunity to up my dose of poison tonight, since I can risk being sick in bed all day tomorrow. Instead, I imagine I’ll find myself in the only occupied room of the best motel in town again.
When the vessel is as clean as it will ever get, the three of us disembark, and I volunteer to haul the trash bags to the dump at the end of the lot. After I’m done, I rinse my hands in the grimy dock bathroom, fully planning on riding my bike directly to Emily’s hotel room. But I’m surprised to find her waiting by the dock, leaning against the door of her rental car.
“What are you doing here?” I ask, drying my hands on my shorts as I approach her. She raises her eyebrows at me.
“Such a warm welcome,” she scoffs, opening up the passenger door. “I thought you could take me on another adventure.”
I’m not sure how I’lltake heron an adventure from the passenger seat, but I shrug and slide in. Not like I know how to drive a car anyway.