Page 171 of Until August

And it is.

We turn to face each other, and I nod. “So happy.” My voice is hushed, as if I’m scared the bubble will burst if I voice it too loudly. “In a way that I never thought possible.”

“He loves you,” she says simply.

“I know. Isn’t it amazing?” I’m so in awe that August loves me as much as I love him and that we found each other again and again until we finally got it exactly right. And now, here we are, about to embark on our new life together.

“Love always amazes me,” Scarlett says. “So yes, it’s amazing, Nic.”

Then she throws her arms around me, catching me by surprise, and practically knocks me over with her exuberance. “I’m going to be an auntie!”

It takes a few seconds for her words to register, but I’m stunned speechless when they do. I’m going to be a mother. And August is going to be a dad again.

We’re having a baby.

It seems like such a huge, monumental thing that I’m having trouble wrapping my head around it.

Scarlett and I are clutching each other, rocking side to side, laughing and crying, so at first, I don’t hear the voices outside the door.

“You can’t go in there!”

“It’s bad luck to see the bride before—”

I look over at the door just as August charges into the bathroom. Scarlett releases me and takes a step back.

“What’s wrong?” he asks, loosening his tie like it’s choking him, and he can’t get enough air. “Are you okay? Are you…” He pushes his hand through his hair, and I can see that he’s sweating. “Fuck. If this is too soon, I’ll tell everyone to go home. We don’t need a wedding to prove our love….”

I smile because he looks so handsome in a gray suit and white dress shirt.

I smile because I love him so much and can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with him.

I’m so giddy and high on life that I rush over to him, throw my arms around his neck, and hold him tight. His arms come around me, offering strength and support for my shaky limbs. I press my nose against the crook of his neck and breathe him in.

I’m marrying this man today.

I’m having this man’s baby.

And I’m so overwhelmed with love that I can’t speak.

I realize I'm crying when he pulls away to search my face.

“Fuck. What is it? What’s wrong?” He brushes the tears away with the pads of his thumbs, then hooks his fingers under my chin and forces my eyes to meet his. “Nicola… what is it?” Concern furrows his brows.

“You.” That’s all I manage to get out. Just,You. Because really, it’s the answer to everything.

He releases me and takes a step back. “You’re crying because of me?”

I shake my head and then nod, confusing him even more. “I’m crying because I love you.”

He shakes his head slowly, his brow still furrowed as he studies my face, trying to make sense of my mood swings. No doubt they’ll only be worse over the upcoming months.

I take a step closer and grab his face in both hands. “We’re going to have a baby.”

I wait for his reaction. It’s slow in coming, but when the words finally sink in, he looks down at my still-flat stomach and then up at my face. “A baby?” he whispers. “You’re pregnant?”

I nod and give him a watery smile. “Yeah.”

“Holy shit. We’re going to have a baby?” He asks as if he’s still not sure he’s heard me right and needs confirmation.