Page 9 of Trusting Skulls (Rebel Skull MC #8)

Chapter Seven

Lexie

I ’m having a stare off with the two boxes on the table at breakfast.

I was so happy when everyone left me alone last night, but here we are, right back where we left off.

“This is ridiculous, you know?”

“Is it?” Dirk asks, stirring his coffee.

“This is a waste of everyone’s time, especially yours.” I point to the two of them. “Since I no longer have a home, I think I should get back and start making plans.”

“You have a home. Didn’t you listen to anything JD said yesterday?”

I open my mouth, but his left eyebrow rises, silencing me. “If for some reason that doesn’t work out, you’re always welcome at the warehouse,” he says.

“But there will be rules,” Jesse reminds me.

“I followed the rules at my parent’s house and look how that turned out.”

“Lexie, when was the last time you had a conversation with either of your parents?” Dirk asks.

“I don’t remember, but we do email all the time.”

“What was the last thing you talked about? Show me. Pull up the email on the phone.”

He tugs my phone out of his pocket and slides it over to me. I quickly scroll through all the notifications from my friends. Most are from guys wanting to hook up. My heart falls when I don’t find one message or missed call from my family.

I go to my emails, finding a new one from them.

It’s the moving company information.

I scroll down to the previous one. It’s about the new company they hired to clean the pool. My finger moves on to the next … it’s about the landscaping. My face suddenly gets hot, and I push it away from me.

Dirk picks it up and leisurely goes through my emails while eating his breakfast.

I stare at mine.

“Why don’t you open another package?” Jesse suggests as she pushes one of the boxes toward me.

My fingers fumble with it as I watch Dirk out the corner of my eye. I wonder what he’s thinking about the correspondence between my parents and me.

I pluck the letter from the box and read it to myself.

Lexie,

Remember that day you and Kelsie were talking about handwriting letters? I remember how you talked about seeing your thoughts come to life at your hand. It got me thinking that maybe you enjoyed writing. I could be wrong, but you spoke about it with such passion … I think I’m on to something.

Anyway, I hope that helps explain my gift. I also whittled a little stand for it. My dad taught me how to do it when I was a boy. I haven’t done it for years, but it’s kind of growing on me again. It gives me time to think while keeping my hands busy. I hope you enjoy it.

This is only week two, and I’m really missing home. You would think the military would have given me some inner fortitude for this, but no. Only ten more weeks to go.

P.S. That includes missing you too.

Ash

I look inside the box and find a beautiful glass dip pen with an ink well. Beside it is a handmade wooden base to hold it. He must have carved the wooden Toto, too. That makes it even more special.

My gaze bounces between my phone and the gift from Ash. The letter from him is so personal. It’s nothing like the correspondence from the people who brought me into this world. Theirs is … clinical.

“What is that?” Dirk asks as I roll the pen in my hand.

Tears sting at the corner of my eyes, and for the first time since he left, I allow myself to miss him. “The most thoughtful gift I’ve ever received.”

“Oh, baby,” Jesse says, reaching for my hand across the table.

Dirk leans back in his chair, rubbing his temples. “Lexie, I can see from these emails that your parents have treated you like nothing more than a property manager. Not a daughter. In your heart, you know that. But goddammit girl, you don’t deserve to be treated that way.”

I pull my hand out of Jesse’s and lay the pen in the little wooden holder. “It’s all I know. What I don’t know is how to do this.” I wave my hand over the gift. “There’s no way I deserve Ash’s kindness.”

“Why not?” he asks.

“I … well, you know why. I’m … I’m … just not good enough for him.”

“Because you let men use you?”

My head falls and I nod, wishing I could melt into the floor. “Ash deserves better.”

He leans forward. “We’re not talking about what he deserves. We’re talking about you.” His attention goes to Jesse. “Get Raffe up here.”

My head pulls back in surprise. “Jackson’s dad?”

Jesse stands, evidently agreeing with him. “On it.” She grabs her phone and heads outside.

“What are you talking about?”

He nods toward the other box on the table. “Open it.”

I groan but do as he asks. It’s a journal and a little wooden bookmark that I’m sure he carved.

Lexie,

Week three and I’m getting into the thick of things with my treatment.

I’m not going to lie, it sucks. There’s a lot of stuff I’d rather not face, but know I need to.

For myself, but also for you. I want to be the best man I can be for both of us.

I’m a little sad you haven’t written to me, but I understand. No pressure.

Now to this week’s gift. Sometimes I see you staring off into space, and I wonder what you’re thinking about.

You seem so far away. Lost even. Maybe writing would help you.

It’s one of the things that we do here in treatment.

I have the exact same journal … I sneaked an extra one for you.

Don’t worry, though. I’ll never ask you to show me what you write inside it. It’s just for you.

Anyhow, it’s almost group time, so I have to go. Please give it a try. It can’t hurt, can it? Sometimes it’s nice to get all the stuff out of your head.

Missing you,

Ash

Dirk stares at me as I lay the letter on the table.

“I wish every one of you would quit wasting your time with me.” I look away.

“Saving souls is not a waste of time. We’re not going to let you fail, Lexie.”