Page 157 of To Scale the Emerald Mountain

I shake my head. “Speaking of visions,” I raise a brow at her. “Did you know I was going to stab my mate in the heart?”

Nana chuckles. “Yes, I did. I Saw it several days before it happened. I didn’t know when, only that you would do it with your beautiful new staff,” she eyes the sharp spear poking above my head. “And I knew that it would be what set you free from the dark magic still holding you, keeping you from accepting the love around you.”

“Did you also know that I can’t truly kill Alec? Even after he came back and my full memories returned, I had no knowledge that mates cannot kill each other.”

“Yes, I knew that, too. As did Alec. We decided not to tell you that bit of information when your electric currents manifested and you tried to hit him. Twice. You were quite volatile and territorial, even as a girl. We had no doubt you would have acted on your violent anger towards him often if you knew he would just come back.” Nana laughs fondly. “I hope you aren’t battling with guilt for your actions. It was required to set you both free.”

“Is it bad that I’m not?” I grimace at her. “I mean—I did at first when I thought he was truly dead, but then he came back and told me to do it again if it was what I needed. I feel like myself again,” I admit.

Nana stops walking and pulls me to the side.

“No, you are guilty of nothing. You gave Alec the outcome he desired when you two fought. You were never going to be yourself without him. As hard as he pushed for you to be your own person, he is a part of you just as much as you are him. When Locane erasedthose memories, he erased a part of you. We feared those memories would never come back.” Nana laughs bitterly. “Gods, Alec has been endlessly frustrated with me these months, reminding him that everything will play out just as it’s meant to. Told me he was sick of my positivity.”

“I think I told you something similar,” I laugh.

She squeezes my hand affectionately and says, “You did.” She stops walking to gaze at me with glassy eyes that make mine well.

“Today is the first time I have seen either of you look fully alive since this whole nightmare started. Don’t let anything pull you away from that, for any reason. You deserve your happiness and the love that Alec has for you. You don’t need me to tell you that he is a great man who absolutely adores you.”

Nana pulls me into her arms tight, wrapping me in her calming peace. “You have faced so much unfairness in life. You should have had your mother. Tellisha would be so proud of you.” I begin to sob as Nana pulls away to cup my cheek. “Raising you in her stead has been the greatest honor of my life. Thank you for all the joy you have brought me.”

“Thank you for always being there for me,” I hiccup and sniffle, barely able to get my words out. “I don’t know who I would be without all you taught me.”

Nana smiles through her shining eyes. “You would be the same brilliant and fierce person you are today. No one can give that to you. Nor can they take it.”

I pull her to me tightly, and she murmurs into my ear, “I am so proud of you, my darling girl.”

Laughing, I wipe my tears and pull away. “I’m not a girl anymore, Nana.”

Her eyes crinkle happily. “No. But you will live to be hundreds of years old, and still, I will call you my darling girl.”

The office Alec directed us to doesn’t have the typical air of an office at all and is more similar to the sitting room attached to my bedchamber, with colorful blankets thrown around and drooping potted plants sweeping the floor.

Cescily’s recommendation is a woman named Mharseila, an Empath who can sense and sway emotions.. Mharseila has the trademark dark skin and hair of the Quinndohsi people, and her dark eyes shine with kindness and understanding. She has a calming aura; on first impression I can see why she’s in this profession and comes highly recommended, aside from her gifts as an Empath.

Mharseila listens to me intently as I recount to her many of the same things I told Alec late into the night, only in much greater detail, touching on areas that I’m not ready to go to with him yet. I open up to her far more than I ever would have imagined I might. By the time I’ve finished, I’m thirsty and everything is bone dry from the amount of tears shed.

Throughout my recounting and searching for words to describe all my conflicting emotions, Mharseila gives me gentle encouragement and reminders that nothing about my emotional turmoil is wrong or abnormal.

We discuss the rigidness of my spool of power connected to my Sight—how it seems cemented and unwilling to relent—to which she tells me that it’s not surprising, considering the trauma inflicted on me was based on that singular gift alone. Mharseilatells me that I am most likely subconsciously suppressing my gift in an attempt at self-preservation.

“Keep practicing. It may be difficult and uncomfortable at first, but I encourage you to keep trying while leaning on the support of those around you,” she tells me in parting words as she escorts me towards an antechamber where Nana waits patiently on a plush chair, reading a book. She smiles up at me when she sees my calm expression.

We exit out onto the street in the bright sunlight, its warmth sinking into me, charging my buzzing electricity that is excited to be released. My feet move with a new lightness—unburdened.

Nana and I discuss briefly about how my appointment went while we purchase flatbread with cheese and mushrooms from a street vendor and sit at the edge of a semi-circle fountain, nestled between two curved sets of stairs leading to a city terrace above. Water splashes merrily behind us from the mouth of the dual faced sun carved into the stone.

“May I join you and Alec this afternoon to test your new powers?” Nana asks me hopefully.

“Only if you’ll finally fight me with that.” My head nudges towards her staff, its indigo hook peaking above her head.

Nana tips her head back, her long hair glinting in the sun, and laughs. “You do have a worthy weapon now,” she says, eyeing my staff appreciatively.

“It really is stunning.”

“It took Alec years to perfect it. His smith was irate every time he scrapped one. He was ready to quit by the time they got the blend right, and then Alec kept bringing it back for alterations.” Nana laughs fondly. “The man actually cursed the king to his facewhen Alec brought it back, yet again, to add the jasmine embellishments.”

“What metal blend is this?” I ask, curiously, stroking the smooth gray iridescent material.