Page 19 of To Love a Monster (Oaths & Obsessions #1)

“Like I said, I’ve gained her trust, but that’s a double-edged blade.

The more time we spend together, the more questions she’ll start asking.

And every time I lie, every time I dodge a question, every detail that doesn’t add up, she’s storing that.

Quietly. And if the truth finally comes when someone tries to take her?

” I shake my head once. “It’ll break her.

Not just because of what’s happening but because I knew.

Because I said nothing when the simple truth could have possibly been enough to keep her cautious. ” I meet Matteo’s eyes.

“If that trust shatters in the moment I need it most, I won’t be able to get close enough to protect her again.

She won’t run toward me, she’ll run from me.

Guaranteed.” A beat. “But if I give her the truth first ... the right amount, at the right time ... she’ll listen.

She’ll trust that what I’m doing is to keep her safe.

And that might be the difference between us keeping her breathing or burying her. ”

Ash falls from his cigarette, the smoke curling in the still air. Matteo’s gaze hardens, his voice turns low and precise. “You make it sound very convincing, Nikolai. Logical and clean. It’s almost like you care for my daughter.” He pauses, just long enough to feel intentional.

“But I’ve seen you when something crawls under your skin, when the lines between mission and obsession start to blur.” His stare sharpens.

“You’ve crossed paths with the Syndicate before. With her . Don’t think I’ve forgotten about what happened.” He doesn’t say Annalise’s name. Doesn’t need to.

“Don’t tell me that hearing her voice after all that happened hasn’t shaken something loose. Don’t tell me this sudden urgency to bring Lila in, to confide in her, has nothing to do with the woman pulling strings on the other side of the wire.” Another pause. This one colder.

“You say this is about keeping Lila safe. But from where I’m sitting, it looks a hell of a lot like you’re circling the flame again.

And this time, it’s my daughter standing in the fire.

” My jaw tightens, breath steady despite the heat rising in my chest. I should have known that as soon as I mentioned Annalise he’d have his guard up again.

And to be honest, with all that happened between us, I don’t blame him.

Not entirely. But now is not the time to make assumptions about a past best forgotten.

“Let’s get something clear,” I say, voice low, measured but steel beneath the calm. “I was brought in by you to protect Lila. That is my job. That is my priority.” I lean forward slightly, eyes locked to the screen.

“And I don’t give a fuck what history I have with Annalise or what ghosts you think I’m still chasing. That woman has nothing to do with the reason I’m standing here right now.” I say, controlled and cold.

“You think I’d use Lila as bait to settle an old score?” My voice hardens. “You think I’d gamble with her just to get close enough to finish something I buried years ago?” I shake my head once.

“You hired me because I’m the one man who won’t fold under pressure. The one who doesn’t break protocol. Who sees the job through even when it’s a fucking bloodbath.” Another breath.

“I’m not here for revenge, Matteo. I’m here to protect your daughter. From every angle, every threat, including the one sitting quietly in the house next door.” I pause again, then lower my voice.

“Whether you trust my reasons or not, I will keep her safe. With my body, my name, my fucking life .” The silence stretches long between us. Then I finish, steady and absolute. “Everything else is just meaningless noise to me.”

There’s a long beat of silence, just the soft crackle of static between us and the low burn of his cigarette. Then Matteo exhales slowly, the smoke curling in front of his mouth like a veil he doesn’t bother to hide behind. His voice is quieter now as his eyes soften and he shakes his head.

“I’ve been around long enough to know what it means when a man starts using words like ‘with my life.’ Nikolai, you didn’t sign up to feel anything for her. I didn’t hire you for that.” His gaze holds mine, unwavering. “But it seems like it’s already too late, doesn’t it?”

He flicks ash off the end of his cigarette, the ember burning low, like something dangerous waiting for breath.

“Men who let emotion steer the wheel tend to make messy choices. They don’t see the angles.

They react instead of calculate. They put themselves between the girl and the bullet without thinking about where the next one’s coming from.

And that. That is what worries me, Nikolai.

” He just studies me like he’s seen this before. Like he already knows the ending.

The silence stretches between us, thick with what neither of us is willing to say out loud, but I don’t flinch, don’t deny or try to justify. I just shift the weight back to what matters.

“I’m not saying she gets everything,” I say finally, my voice quiet but firm. “But if she knows enough, if she understands that someone who is getting close to her isn’t who he says he is, then we have a better shot. She might even be able to help us set the trap.”

That snaps him upright. “You’re not using my daughter as bait, Nikolai.” The quiet fury in his voice is like a gun cocking.

“I wouldn’t be suggesting this if I thought there was a better way and I would never do it without her consent,” I say.

“We have until tomorrow night. That’s our only window of opportunity.

Carl won’t move until then—he thinks everything is going to plan.

He’s too comfortable at the moment, which also makes him an easy target until backup arrives and we have an even bigger shit storm to handle.

This is about getting the upper hand, Matteo.

Something we don’t have right now. Something they do.

But if Lila knows what’s coming, she becomes the one thing they don’t expect.

” Matteo’s face is stone, but his silence carries weight.

I pause, jaw tight. “This is the perfect time to hit back. If she helps, if she’s aware and prepared, I can catch him off guard. Corner him. And we cut the Syndicate off before they ever lay a hand on her.”

The room on his side of the screen is thick with smoke and stillness. Then he finally speaks. “I don’t like it.”

“I know. Trust me, Matteo. I don’t either.” He stares at me like he’s trying to read between every word. But finally, he says it.

“Fine. I trust you, Nikolai.” The words are simple, but they land like steel. Then his gaze sharpens, a final flicker of something colder beneath the surface.

“Don’t make me regret this.” A pause. “You fuck it up, and you won’t need to worry about the Syndicate coming for you.” Another breath. “Because I’ll get there first.”

I nod once, then add, “I’m going to need proof. Something that shows her this isn’t just me spinning some story to turn her against Carl. She won’t believe speculation, she’s smarter than that.”

Matteo's voice drops low. “What kind of proof do you need that you don’t already have access to?”

“I don’t know. Photos. Records showing he was watching her before she ever met him.

Surveillance, timestamps, location trails, anything that proves I’m telling the truth.

I want something that she can hold in her hands.

Something official. Something real. Because if I don’t have that, she won’t believe any of it. ”

He’s quiet for a long moment. Then he says “You’ll have it within the hour. I say nothing as I get ready to end the call but then Matteo nods once. “Oh, and Nikolai?”

I pause. “Yes.”

“Don’t just stop him.” A pause. “Make sure you send a message.” Then the screen fades to black. He hired me to protect her. And I will. But I’m done lying to her. Whatever version of the story Matteo wants told, too bad. I’m doing this my way.