Page 31 of Thorns That Bloom (Venusverse #3)

“Thought of everything, huh?” I note with a crooked smile. He smiles back, a faint blush dancing on his cheeks. He passes the spoon to me and opens his container. “Are you going to eat standing up? You…ugh.” I let out a frustrated snort. “You can sit next to me, you know? It’s fine. I’m not…”

“I wasn’t sure. I didn’t want to push into your—”

“Friends can sit next to each other, can’t they?” I reply dryly, making sure to roll my eyes so Theo can see. It works well to hide the fact that my chest warms a little over how careful he’s being.

When I open the container, the food looks as good as it smells, if not better. Fresh baby spinach leaves and Parmesan are sprinkled on top as garnish. The sauce covering the rice is vibrant green and smooth as I stir everything together.

I take a spoonful in and my taste buds explode with flavor. Moaning, I close my eyes as I chew, feeling Theo’s gaze on me, but I don’t let it bother me.

“You like it then?” he asks with a quiet chuckle.

“Fuck. That’s divine.” I don’t care how unhinged I sound.

I take another bite, savoring the creamy, rich dish.

I guess risotto is my new favorite. Even the baby finally stops stirring and kicking, and I wonder if they can taste it.

Probably not. I almost don’t want to admit it out loud, but…

“This is the best thing to happen to me today,” I mutter, licking my lips.

Theo eats his portion next to me, but he doesn’t look nearly as affected. In fact, he barely seems interested in the food. In my endless pregnant hunger, I nearly ask him if he wouldn’t mind giving me his portion, too.

“How so?” Tender care pulses through his voice when he asks that. “Not having a good day?”

“No. Well, now I am.”

Theo doesn’t smile back. He looks at me like I’m some hurt puppy, so I stop eating and sigh. I never should’ve mentioned it. Of course he’s worried.

“Some days are harder to deal with than others,” I say quietly.

His eyes soften even more. I don’t want him to look at me that way. And yet…it’s hard to be angry at such a kind expression. His beautiful eyes search my face, lips pursed with concern. So I say nothing. I swallow any biting remarks and hang my head.

“I’m sorry. I don’t know what else to say.”

Me neither.

“Nothing more you can say.”

“Is there anything I can do? I could leave, if you’d like to be alone?”

With a scoff, I glare sharply at him. “If I were in a state where I couldn’t handle being around anyone, I wouldn’t have agreed to meet, would I?

Do I look like I did in the restroom that one time?

” Theo nearly flinches, as though I struck him, and I watch his expression morph from worry into panic.

It makes me even more frustrated, so I turn away again and take a slow breath to bring my spiking pulse under control.

“You are helping. The food is helping. It was, anyway. Before you started making that bleeding-heart face. I appreciate this. I just need you to stop acting like I’m made of glass or something. ”

My stomach clenches. I hate myself for feeling this way. For saying those things in that sharp tone when all he’s trying to do is help.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers.

I sigh. “No, I am. I’m just… I haven’t been sleeping well. My nerves and my hormones are all over the place. Your delicious food and your…stupid face distracted me, so let’s get back to that, alright?”

Theo’s low laugh gives me the courage to look back at him. Finally, that pity seems to fade away. “Alright. I…I’m happy you like it.”

I’m nearly done with my meal, and I could probably do with ten more portions.

I’ve eaten too fast again. Can’t wait for the horrible heartburn.

For a few glorious minutes, we eat in silence. Just existing, breathing in the fresh air. People pass by in the hall but hardly pay us attention. Theo’s shoulder, while not touching me directly, radiates heat against mine, and it’s…comforting.

With a loud exhale, I lean back once I’m done and hold my belly. There’s already the slightest burn itching at the bottom of my stomach, but I don’t even care. It was delicious. I’ll gladly bear the consequences of gobbling up the heavenly risotto.

I turn to Theo. He’s finishing up the last few bites much slower than I did, like a normal person would. As if the food-induced delirium has worn off, my mind starts wandering in the wrong direction again. Toward doubts and unpleasant questions.

What am I even doing here?

What am I doing here with him?

“What is it?” he asks. I didn’t even realize I’d zoned out staring at him. I blink and notice his careful gaze that’s fixed on me. The wind sends his pheromones my way, and they’re tender, too.

I open my mouth, ready to push him away again, tell him it’s nothing, maybe even put the container down and go away so that I can brew in my negative emotions alone, but my phone starts vibrating in my pocket.

We both look toward it. I’m grateful for the distraction, at least until my face unlocks the screen and I see the notification on top.

‘Leave for a prenatal appointment,’ the alert says.

I blink in bewilderment at first, my mind fraying, before it hits me. “Shit. Shit!” I stand sharply, my cheeks prickling. “Fuck.”

“What’s going on?” Theo asks, nearly dropping his food.

How the hell could I forget? Goddamn stupid pregnancy brain!

At my last appointment, I didn’t arrange the follow-up because their system was down. The doctor said she wanted to see me twice a month now that I’m getting closer to the finishing line, so I set this date last minute, in a hurry. If I hadn’t put it in my phone, I would’ve missed it point blank.

“I…I have an appointment I completely forgot about,” I mumble, pacing across the balcony while rubbing my hand over my face. It’s not like it’s a big deal, but…it is a big deal.

I haven’t mentally prepared for this. Especially on a day like today, when I feel like any touch or slightest inconvenience might unravel me into a panicked mess.

Did I ask my supervisor for a longer lunch to go, or did I forget to do that, too? I can’t freaking remember!

“Hey, hey, hey,” Theo says to get my attention, voice firm but soft. I blink and look up, realizing he’s standing in front of me. His hands are stuck in the middle of the motion of reaching for my shoulders, which he…doesn’t. I swallow and step back, nodding with a slow inhale.

He’s right. I've gotta calm down.

“Are you late for it?”

“No,” I mutter, shaking my head. “No, it’s not that, I just—”

“What appointment is it?”

I close my eyes, taking another deep breath. “My thirty-week scan.”

It’s absurd. These feelings of fear and panic roaring through me.

I need to be an adult. This is no different from the other appointments.

So why am I trembling? Why are those horrible emotions from the morning returning?

The choking, tingling sensation. The echoes of violent touches and pain. Breathless terror, cold and—

“Everything is okay, Sam.” The way Theo’s voice deepens resonates through me.

Almost like I’m in a trance, I look at him again.

He pulls me away from those spiraling thoughts and toward the light.

He’s smiling. Not pityingly like before, but kindly.

“Memory problems are normal in the third trimester. Don’t be so hard on yourself. ”

I gulp and nod, slowly coming around to believing Theo instead of the voice in my head telling me I’m stupid and useless.

“Did you tell the office you need to leave for the appointment?”

“I…I don’t think so. I forgot, I think.”

What kind of parent am I? The baby isn’t even here yet, and I’m already screwing up.

“Alright.” Theo’s voice remains steadfast, controlled.

That’s what he’s doing—taking control over the situation.

Not having to do that for myself right now is exhilarating.

He keeps talking while closing the plastic containers and placing them back in his backpack.

“I get it. You’re stressed. It’s a lot. Would you… would you like me to come with you?”

I raise my brows in shock. “Come with me?” I mouth.

“You know, to the appointment. For-for moral support.” He tilts his head with a smile that tries to hide the insecure undertone of his voice. “I mean, this can’t be easy to do alone. If that’s…”

Going there always makes me feel inadequate.

I know the doctors don’t care. I know it’s normal for people to go to these appointments without their partner, and that I don’t need another person to do this, but seeing those affectionate couples in the waiting room, all giddy to share that experience together, sometimes leaves me feeling utterly empty and wrong.

More times than not. I try to be strong for my child, but I can’t just push those emotions aside.

Definitely not today.

“Y-yeah.” I swallow the lump in my throat, hardly believing what I just said. “I’d like that.”

Even Theo’s face is painted with surprise. “Alright,” he says, recovering quickly. “How about I go tell your office manager that you need to leave while you wait in the car?”

Somewhere deep inside, a primitive part of me gets roused by the way he takes control in such a caring, assured way. An alpha protecting his omega. Doing what needs to be done.

Before I can be disturbed by how easily a ridiculous thought like that popped into my head—a thought that has to be nothing but raging pregnancy hormones—I hear Theo open the door to the balcony. He stands in the doorway, waiting for me to get myself together while gently gesturing for me to come.

I do, my heart still beating against my increasingly cramped rib cage. “What about you?” I ask as we head back, feeling a little dazed.

“My shift doesn’t start for another hour and a half. Don’t worry,” he says it like it’s great news, but…why did he come so early? Just to eat lunch with me?

Yeah. That’s exactly why.

Does a friend…really do something like that?