Page 45 of Things We Need to Say (Second Chance Love Stories #2)

‘So what do you think, then?’ Jenny asked as Emma looked around the staff accommodation later that week.

Since the banquet, she’d tried to keep things light between her and Jay.

She hadn’t wanted to put a dampener on his success, but she knew she couldn’t let it carry on much longer.

Being around him when she knew he had feelings for someone else was just too painful.

She had to move out soon for the sake of her own sanity.

All she could think of when she saw Jay was Chloe, and so she’d asked Jen to show her the staff accommodation.

The room itself was small with a bed, en-suite bathroom and an easy chair, with a shared kitchen and lounge outside.

It was very much like the student accommodation she’d lived in before she’d moved in with Jay.

But she was qualified now and in a management job she loved.

Living here would seem like a step backwards.

‘I know it’s a bit basic, but most of the staff don’t spend a lot of time here. They get most of their food in the hotel and they do socialise a lot together.’

‘Well, it’s clean and tidy, and it will save me time and money on the commute. It’s certainly got that going for it.’ And it’s fine , she thought. Even if it wasn’t ideal, it was okay as a stop-gap. And at least it would be cheap, so she could save up for something better. It wouldn’t be for ever.

‘I think it could work, I’m just...’ She trailed off. She needed some time on her own, away from Jay. This would be fine. ‘I’ll take it. When can I move in?’

‘Well, it’s empty now, so whenever you want.’

‘Great. I’ll sort something out in the next few days.’

* * *

‘I hear you’re moving in with us,’ Nick said in the staffroom the following day. He was always the first to winkle out the gossip, so she wasn’t surprised to find that he knew about her move. But what did he mean by ‘us’?

‘Sorry? What?’

‘I hear you’re moving into the staff accommodation.’

‘I am, yes, but don’t you live near Kennington? You told me that when you walked me home.’

‘Ah, yes, well. That was a little white lie, I’m afraid. I thought if you knew where I really lived, you wouldn’t let me walk you, and I wanted to spend some time together. Just you and me.’

‘And you came all the way back again?’

He held his hands up in submission. ‘Guilty as charged.’

Emma shook her head. She’d been doing her best to keep her distance from Nick. Living in the same accommodation as him would make that difficult to say the least.

‘How about I cook you a meal the night you move in?’

‘I don’t know. My life’s a bit of a mess at the moment.’

‘All the more reason to have a home-cooked meal. I make a mean risotto.’

Nick could be very persistent when he wanted something, but she wasn’t sure it was a good idea. She had other things to think about. She couldn’t put off telling Jay any longer and she suspected her news would come as a shock to him. Especially as she had already made arrangements to move out.

‘Have you and your fella split up, then?’ Nick asked when she didn’t answer.

‘It certainly looks that way.’

‘And you’re the one doing the dumping?’

‘It’s complicated.’

‘It always is. So risotto? Tomorrow night?’

‘Nick.’ She sighed. ‘Jay and I might be over, but I’m not ready to get into anything else.’

‘I get that. And I know I’ve made no secret of the fact that I fancy you, but I can see that you don’t feel the same. If you need a friend, though, I’m your man.’

‘Thanks, Nick.’ He was right — she did need a friend. Just as long as he didn’t try to cross any lines.

‘So how about it, then?’

‘I’m not sure. I came here to give myself space.’

‘It’s just food.’

She did need to eat and it would be nice to do that in company. ‘Risotto it is.’

* * *

Jay concentrated as he kneaded the fresh pasta dough.

He needed to start making amends with Emma somehow.

The atmosphere between them over the last week had been so tense.

Several times he’d attempted to have a proper conversation with her, but each time he’d chickened out, afraid that if he said the wrong thing it would all be over between them.

But they couldn’t carry on like this any longer, so this morning he’d checked the calendar, seen that Emma would finish her shift at six tonight, and had decided to cook her favourite pasta dish — spinach-and-ricotta ravioli with walnut pesto and a creamed basil sauce.

There was wine chilling in the fridge and homemade profiteroles for dessert.

After the conversation with Liz, he’d realised how badly he’d got it wrong with Emma.

Of course she felt taken for granted, the way he had treated her recently.

He’d been selfish and blind, thinking only of his own needs.

No wonder she’d got the wrong idea when she’d seen him with Chloe.

That should never have happened. Emma had always been there for him — that was one of the reasons he loved her, because she was so caring and giving, and that was what she needed from him in return.

Tonight he would do his best to show her that she was the only girl for him.

It was her turn to receive the love she deserved.

First though, he needed to have a serious talk with Chloe.

He finished kneading the pasta, wrapped it in cling film and placed it in the fridge.

Then he washed his hands, wondering what he was going to say to Chloe.

He would just have to wing it and make it up as he went along.

He’d been putting off ringing her but tonight, when he sat down with Emma, he wanted to be able to speak to her with a clear conscience. He picked up the phone.

‘Jay, hi! It’s lovely to hear from you.’ Chloe sounded so happy to hear from him. Jay swallowed nervously.

‘Chloe, hi, I was ringing about—’

‘It must be intuition because I was just about to call you.’

‘You were?’

‘Yes, I’ve got some amazing news to tell you. Angela’s offered me a job in her restaurant.’

‘She has? But I thought you wanted to move away from restaurants.’

‘Well, I certainly don’t want to work in the restaurant I’m in at the moment, but working for Angela will be completely different.

It’s her whole ethos of mentoring and treating people with respect and equality.

It’s going to be like a breath of fresh air and I know I’m going to learn so much from her. ’

‘Yes, I think you will.’ Jay breathed a sigh of relief. Not working with Chloe would make life so much less complicated. And working with Angela would benefit her career, far more than covering Liz’s maternity leave with him. ‘That’s such good news, Chloe. Congratulations.’

‘Oh, I’m so glad you’re pleased for me. I was a bit worried about telling you, to be honest. I know we’d talked about me coming to work for you and Liz, but this really is an opportunity I couldn’t turn down.’

‘I completely agree with you. And don’t worry, we understand. I can see why this is the right choice for you.’

‘Thank you, Jay. And I just want to say that working with you during the competition played an important part in me getting this job.’

‘It did?’

‘Yes, for the first time in a long time I was working with people who believed in me as a chef. You’ve no idea how much confidence that gave me.’

‘Well, I’m glad I could help.’

‘And it’s nice to have made such a good friend. You stuck up for me in other things as well and I’ll always be grateful for that.’

‘I’m just glad it’s worked out for you, Chloe. You deserve it.’

As he put the phone down, his hands were shaking with relief. But he still needed to get things back on track with Emma. That would be the hardest part, convincing her that he deserved another chance.

* * *

Emma put her key in the door with something akin to dread. She’d been putting this conversation off all week and now she would just have to rip the plaster off and get it over and done with.

As she opened the door, she heard Jay clattering about in the kitchen and the most delicious smell hit her. Her heart sank. She hoped he wasn’t cooking for her.

Emma put her head round the door. ‘Hi,’ she said quietly. Jay was stirring a sauce and tasting it until he got the flavour he wanted, as she’d watched him do so many times before. ‘What are you up to?’

‘Emma, hi, you’re early.’ He looked at his watch.

‘It was quiet in the office so they let me go.’

‘Well, I’m glad you’re here because I’ve cooked you dinner. We haven’t spent much time together recently and I wanted to talk to you.’

‘Oh, okay.’ This was the last thing she’d been expecting.

‘Why don’t you get changed out of your suit and then we can relax with a glass of wine before dinner.’

‘Sure.’

She made a hasty retreat to their bedroom. She would do as he said and get changed. After months of practically ignoring her, why did he choose tonight, the very night she was going to tell him it was over between them, to cook her dinner?

Her hand shook as he handed her a glass of wine in the living room.

‘Jay, look, this is all very nice, but there’s something I’ve got to tell you.’

‘Please, can I just say my bit first?’

She sighed and sat down. ‘Go on then.’

He sat down next to her and tried to take hold of her hand, but she moved it away before he could touch her. He leaned back, frowning.

‘I know the last few months have been really difficult and that’s down to me.

’ When she didn’t reply, he carried on. ‘I’ve been completely caught up in the competition and have neglected you.

And you haven’t deserved it. In fact, you deserve so much better.

I’m so sorry I pushed you away and I understand why you’re angry with me. ’

‘I’m not angry with you,’ she said softly.

‘Well, I would be. But I’ve realised that, even though I won, the competition wasn’t worth it. Not at the risk of losing you.’