Page 35 of The Valiant Knight (The Ravensmire Chronicles #2)

Finn planned on hovering over his lady, especially since she seemed to get herself in danger.

A.

LOT.

Like the lake.

Like falling into the crypt.

Like the falling bookshelves.

Pulling out the first letter, they began at the beginning so they could catch up.

‘Ravensmire Castle

Scotland

August 1593

My dearest Duncan,

My dearest love, but I miss you so much, and I can’t wait for your return to Ravensmire. A lot has happened since you left, and a lot must be told to you.

I am with your child.

We are expecting a little one, and one day, when you return to me, my love, we shall be a family.

I was wrong to tell you I shouldn’t have married you. My lord, I was so very wrong. I see that now, and I wish I could take those words back since they damaged not only you, but what was between us.

The flowers didn’t bloom this year. As I stood here looking down from Ravensmire, the highlands were empty. I’m hoping that isn’t some kind of sign of what is to come. Maybe it’s witchcraft, or the sorcery of the English destroying our lands, but I worry that you sent me that sign.

Was it to tell me what I fear so much?

Is it that you are never returning to Ravensmire? Is that the message?

I know you said those words in frustration and anger, and I know that I am just as guilty of the same sins, but we must be strong.

We have a wee one coming.

My Lord, you’re going to be a good father. You are, after all, protective, strong, and like no man I’ve ever met before in my whole existence.

How do I live without you?

This is something I ask myself over and over again, as I wish I thought those words before I told you to leave my sight.

How I wish I could take them back, make them disappear like the mist that is called back when the sun reaches into the sky.

But I can’t.

I can’t take back what hurt you, but going forward, I can promise to be a better mate, a stronger soul to lean on when you are tired and exhausted.

I can be better if you just return to me.

That’s all it will take.

Give me another chance to prove that our love isn’t just arranged but was meant to be.

Anyway, I hope we see each other soon. I miss your beard, and your embrace. I miss you holding me tight and protecting me.

Until we see each other again, and I can be held in your strong arms against your body…

Your love,

Ceit.’

She considered it.

“At some point, they were good,” she said. “How did that go to the point where she’s killed?” Gabby asked. “Because that’s a wide margin there.”

Yes, it was.

And that was a good question.

“I guess a lot can happen in a marriage,” Finn said, “specifically if it’s an arranged marriage. They were tossed together and forced to figure it out.”

Tony agreed.

“She was a child,” he said. “She was around eighteen when she gave birth.”

Finn was curious.

“About how old was Duncan? Can you tell by what you saw with his bones?”

He nodded.

“His bones stopped growing, and he shows markers of arthritis. I’d put him at about fifty-five when he died, but he was likely in his thirties when he married. That was the standard for men back then.”

Immediately, Gabby shook her head.

“Nope. That’s all kinds of wrong. I don’t care what century you lived in. That’s just icky.”

On that, Finn agreed.

Unfortunately, in the sixteen hundreds, they made women marry young.

And against their will.

“What happens next?” Tony asked.

Pulling out the next paper in the order Ian and Gryphen had left them, not in the order of their dates, she read it to the two men as they followed along.

‘Ravensmire Castle

Scotland

October 1593

My Dearest Duncan,

Your letters have stopped, and that scares me. I don’t know where you are anymore.

Are you injured?

Have you been hurt?

I pray you’re not dead.

Get word to me, and I’ll ride out to find you. I’ll do anything to get to you. What wouldn’t I do for the father of my child?

I do believe our baby is doing well. I can feel him or her moving in me. The local medicine woman has said it is a lass. She believes we are carrying a daughter.

Isn’t that a miracle?

All the heirs have been boys, and now, we’ve made another miracle for Ravensmire.

I pray it’s right and she wasn’t just saying that to appease me.

Today, I was out on the highlands on one of the horses, your favorite, and I swore I heard your voice whispering to me through the heather.

It brought tears to my eyes, thinking that maybe you were home.

That maybe my love had rejoined me, and we were to be one.

Then, it brought fear to my soul believing that you might have gone and left this realm.

Was it your spirit?

Was it a ghost?

Are you dead, Duncan?

Is that what you were trying to tell me? I hope not, for I will never survive that. If word comes that you are gone from this world, I hope I am the next to be taken.

I’m so sorry for my anger and how I told you I would never love a man I was forced to marry.

Every day, I wish I could take it back and instead see how much you meant to me. Our love was meant to be, and I believe it to my soul.

Please forgive me, my love.

Don’t leave me behind and find someone else to show your love to.

Please come back to Ravensmire where we can be a family.

I want nothing more than to have you come home to me so we can give life to our child, and raise our family here. The world might be against us, but we will win.

We can make sure we do as long as we have each other.

Just survive the battle, My Lord.

Please, Duncan.

Please.

Every night, I make the servants light the candles in the tower. Every night, I keep that light burning in hopes that you can see it as you ride in to be with us, and every morning, you are still not here.

What has happened to you?

Have you found another?

Did you mean your words when you said there were others who would be happy to be with you?

This haunts me nightly, and throughout the day that you have found love with someone else. That at this very moment you are in bed with another.

Is someone sharing your body?

Is someone giving you the pleasures that should be my duty, my Lord?

Have you forsaken our marriage?

Would you leave me for real?

I hope that you aren’t sick or ill. Find me, Duncan, and please tell me you love me again.

I don’t know how to go on now that I know I might have driven you away with my harsh tongue.

I will love you until I die.

Forever.

Ceit.’

Finn shook his head.

“Uh-oh. It’s starting. She’s already suspicious, and by now, she knows that he’s replaced her. The woman always knows.”

That was the truth.

They did.

Now, Gabby was thinking about the letter they found. It was clear that it fit somewhere in this cluster, and they were out of order.

Finn saw her thinking.

“What’s going on in that head of yours, Gabby?” he asked.

She pulled out the letter they found in the crypt.

“I think this one goes next,” she said. “Because I peeked at the third one that Gryphen and Ian found. It makes sense. We should store them in order so whoever comes here after us can figure out where we left off.”

That sounded good to them.

Tony was curious.

“Okay, what’s next?”

She handed him the letter, and this time, he read it to them.

‘Ravensmire Castle

Scotland

September 1593

My Dearest Duncan,

I love you and miss you. I can’t wait until you are back at home in our castle. I don’t think I’ve ever thanked you, so I will. I love our home. I can’t imagine not being here.

Something does concern me though, and I’ve had to think about this for a while.

It’s about your friendship with Ciarán Begbie. He’s always around, and I have hope that when our child is born, you’ll have him leave our home.

He makes me uncomfortable, and while I know you two are close, and enjoy each other’s company, I am not.

Truthfully, my Lord, he stares at me with discontent, as if I’m in his way.

I don’t understand it, but I can feel it.

Again, I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, but he scares me. Maybe it is my imagination, but we are going to have to talk about his role in our lives.

I don’t mind him staying in a smaller house on the outskirts of the castle, for I know how you rely on him in battle, but in our home…

Can we discuss this?

I hate to bother you with such trivial things, but this is a deep concern of mine.

We shall talk later.

Until then, know that I am always standing in the tower, waiting to see you ride over the highlands to come home to us.

Forever,

Your Ceit.’

He considered it.

“She was afraid of him. You said that she told you that she was killed. Maybe he hurt her.”

Tony agreed.

“Something happened between her writing that letter, and then her death.”

Finn could see that being a possibility.

Gabby had the papers that Graham found when the men opened the tower up, and while not dated, they felt like they fit here.

“Graham gave me two letters that were found. I think they fit here. Let’s see if they make sense before we read the other one Ian and Gryphen found.”

That worked for them.

‘My Dearest Duncan,

My heart beats whenever I see you, my Lord. It’s that look in your eyes, or that truly wicked grin of yours. It makes me weak.

And I’m not ashamed of that either.

When you arrived in this area, trying to fight for us, that was the moment that I lost my heart. That was the beginning of me, and there can be no me without you, my Lord.

With your tartan trew and the colors of your family, I was ensnared in that magic. You look magnificent in red, blue, and gold, my love.

Truly magnificent, but you look better naked above me.

Whether it be because of the situation, or the fact that when you touch me, I can’t think, all I know is that my Lord, I love thee.

And I forever will.

I love thee so much that I can’t imagine not being by your side for the rest of my life.

It is my fondest wish to always serve you, and to make you as happy as I can.

I feel remorse for the mess my desires and love have caused you.