Page 115 of The Stranger in Room Six

Karen is sitting by the window with a photograph album in her lap.

A picture of Gerald beams out at me. Part of me would throttle him if he was still here. But there’s also a small voice that says ‘Come on. You were never suited. Besides, you always loved Imran.’

She looks up at us.

‘This is my son!’ she says, beaming at me as if introducing us.

‘I know,’ I say.

Stephen crouches down by her side. ‘Does Belinda look after you all right, Mum?’

He is scared, quite rightly, that I might try to hurt her. Who can blame him?

‘Oh yes,’ she says. ‘We have some lovely chats.’

Then her forehead wrinkles. ‘Apart from the night of the party.’

I stiffen.

‘What happened then?’

‘I told everyone how my Gerald would call me Twinkle. I don’t think she liked that. Belinda took me for a walk, and then we heard a shot.’

She giggles as if it’s funny. ‘We were both a bit scared, weren’t we, Belinda, when we heard that gun go off?’

‘Yes,’ I say. ‘We were.’

‘Do you know, for a moment, I thought you had shot me.’

‘Why would I do that?’

‘It might have had something to do with a man I once knew called Gerald.’

She speaks as though she hadn’t just been talking about him. I’ve learned that lost conversational trails are common in dementia sufferers.

Stephen cuts in. ‘Gerald was Belinda’s husband, Mum. My dad. The man you had an affair with. So I have to ask you something. Are you really happy for Dad’s wife to look after you here?’

Karen’s eyes narrow. She’s glaring at me. ‘But she’s not his wife, is she? Not really. He loved me.’

I’m about to say that of course I was his bloody wife. But then I stop. What kind of marriage did Gerald and I have? It was a sham. I have a feeling that Stephen was right when he said his parents really did love each other.

‘I like Belinda,’ Karen is saying, stretching out her hand to me. She’s switched moods again. ‘She’s a good listener.’

I can’t say I like her back because I don’t.

But at least I no longer feel like I want to kill her.

When I think of her as a woman who has been struck too early by this cruel disease, I can’t help but feel sorry for her.

Then I remember Mabel saying that there’s always a reason for someone to do something.

Karen’s reason for stealing my husband was that she really had loved him. And I hadn’t.

‘I can assure you, Mr Greaves,’ I say stiffly, ‘that I would never harm your mother.’

‘If you did, you’d end your life in jail.’

‘I don’t need reminding of that.’

‘Then let’s move on to other family matters, may we?’ His voice softens. ‘My mother always told me that my father wanted me to meet my sisters one day.’

‘Half-sisters,’ I remind him sharply.

‘I’m sorry. That’s what I meant. Do you think you could ask them?’

Why on earth should I do that?

‘I can’t ask Gillian because she hasn’t spoken to me since her father died,’ I say. ‘I’m in contact with Elspeth but I don’t know whether she would want to see you.’

‘They’re the only family I have left now, apart from Mum.’ His voice has turned from tough to desperate. ‘Your girls and I don’t just share your husband’s blood. We share memories of the same man. I have no one else to talk to about that. Please, will you just ask them?’

There’s a longing and vulnerability on his face that moves me, despite everything.

And beneath it all, I worry that if I don’t make it happen, he will tell the manager about my past. Then they’ll check my DBS, discover it’s fake and sack me.

I would find it hard to get a similar job without references.

But most of all, I would lose people whom I’ve grown to love and care for: especially Mabel.

I just hope I’m not going to lose her anyway with my betrayal.

‘I’ll ask my daughters,’ I say reluctantly. ‘But I can’t make any promises.’

‘Thank you.’ He hands me his card.

‘You’re a dentist?’ I ask, impressed.

‘Yes. That’s my private number. You can get in touch with me any time.’

That’s when I notice something.

‘You’re wearing Gerald’s watch.’

‘Dad left it to me in his will.’

I want to say that’s not fair. I want to ask if he’d left my girls a special gift too. I want to ask Gerald what the hell he was playing at, having two families.

But dead men give no answers.