Page 5

4 MEG

Milky coffee and eggs two-ways. Sometimes with spinach, rarely with hash browns, always with the poshest bread they could find, anything that could give two vegetarians the buzz of a full English. That was their special breakfast and one of the things Meg had been missing while Hannah was away, along with other niche parts of the day that were her personal highlights. She had missed the moment Hannah would make a cup of tea and serve it with a biscuit like they were at a hotel. Most of all she missed the minutes in bed facing each other just before sleep, when they chatted complete nonsense, the anonymity of the darkness allowing them to say whatever came into their minds until Hannah, and it was usually Hannah, would fall silent and Meg would look to see she had gone quietly to sleep.

As a couple, they loved going out to eat but there was something about being in their own space when reunited that to Meg felt very intimate, and much more special. It meant they could talk about anything with no self-consciousness or interruptions.

They had not lived in the flat long, and with Hannah being away a lot, there were heaps of things waiting to be sorted. Though Meg had grown up in the area, she still felt like there was a lot of exploring to do together, of new places and routines, but they needed to sort inside the house first. There were boxes and bags pushed to the corners of each room, and strips of paint options on the wall. The living room and kitchen stretched across the first floor, looking out onto the street, and the abnormally windy season, which had seemingly got worse over the last day or so, occasionally rattled the windows in their frames with an annoyingly sudden noise. Sitting at the table with Hannah, Meg couldn’t have been happier.

‘How was the flight then?’ she asked.

‘Fine once we were on,’ Hannah replied, cutting into her toast. She was wearing an old university T-shirt of Meg’s, and pyjama bottoms. ‘It’s all the waiting around I can’t stand, everybody trying to jump the queue, or pacing around.’

‘Were you pacing?’

‘I had headphones on, just desperate to get into my seat and eat a KitKat and try to fall asleep.’

It must have been a late one. Meg would have stayed up till eleven, maybe even midnight, to see her fiancée after a long trip, but with Hannah not tiptoeing into the bedroom until two in the morning, Meg was glad she’d gone to bed at a normal time.

‘So catch me up,’ Hannah said. ‘What’s been happening while I was away?’

Hannah had been in Italy for just five days, but it had felt like a lifetime. Meg did not usually feel needy at all, but the separation had felt interminably long this time. That was the danger, really, of working freelance and in solitude. The night before, she had gone to the cinema alone in an attempt to prove she was independent, but without anyone to laugh at the jokes with or to hold her popcorn in the foyer while she went to the toilet, it had made her feel worse. She was worried about seeing someone from her past. It was probably the continued silence from her parents getting to her on a subconscious level, having that intense need for support and familiarity.

‘It’s been busy,’ Meg said. ‘I’ve been working on and off, went to the cinema last night, been to the gym in the mornings.’

‘And the flower shop with your parents on Tuesday,’ Hannah said, sitting back in her chair and holding the warm mug with both hands. ‘How was that?’

Meg wasn’t sure how to tell Hannah what had happened without getting upset again. She knew – of course – that she could cry in front of Hannah, but every part of her just wanted to say she’d had a great time with her parents, and that everything was fine. Perhaps if she said it, she might be able to make it true.

‘They didn’t show up.’

‘They what?’

‘They just didn’t come,’ Meg said, looking at Hannah’s confused face. ‘They sent a text to say they couldn’t and I ended up crying outside the florist’s, which was embarrassing but the nice man in there, David, he invited me in and talked to me about it, and I felt a lot better.’

‘Well I’m glad someone was nice to you,’ Hannah said, reaching her hand out across the table to hold Meg’s. ‘But that’s rubbish, Meg. I can’t believe they did that.’

‘Maybe they’re just taking a while longer to get used to it?’ Meg said, knowing her face wouldn’t look like even she believed that. ‘We are having quite a short engagement – maybe it will just take them a second.’

‘Yeah,’ Hannah said, in a sad tone of voice. She got it, of course, but Meg worried often if Hannah hated the situation they were in. When deciding on the wedding plans, Meg had deliberately wanted and pushed Hannah for them to get married that summer, and part of that had been the fact she was worried about her parents’ involvement in the wedding. She had hoped, perhaps uselessly, a short run-up would minimize the chances of them being difficult.

‘I mean they’ve come round before,’ Meg said. ‘Remember initially when they were funny about meeting you, and now we see them, well we see them quite regularly I guess.’

‘Well I think we thought we’d see them more, now we’ve moved back to down the road from them, to be fair.’ Hannah looked at her. ‘We’ve not been round much since Christmas.’

‘I guess not.’

‘Sorry, Meg, I’m not meaning to, you know …’

‘I get it … I do.’ Meg put down her cutlery. ‘Just what if they don’t come to the wedding? Or what if they say they will – like at the flower shop – then leave me there embarrassed on the day? I’d be so upset, I don’t know what I’d do.’

‘I know.’

They sat in silence, and Meg felt like Hannah didn’t know what to say. Maybe she should have told her earlier so she’d had time to prepare a pep talk.

‘Anyway,’ Meg said, smiling, putting their world back how it should be on a Saturday morning with the full promise of a weekend together ahead of them. ‘You’re back now, so it’s fine. We can sort everything without them, and fix this together. It would have been nice to pick flowers with them but that’s their choice.’

Hannah put her knife and fork down. ‘Are you going to call them?’

‘I’m too hurt right now, I think. They know where I am, and they left me on my own. They can contact me.’

‘Look, about the being away …’ Hannah looked at Meg with the face that said she was going to tell her something she did not want to hear. Meg could suddenly tell her mouth was hanging open so she closed it.

‘What?’

‘I wanted to tell you in person,’ Hannah said. ‘They’ve put me on the conference I told you about, which is great! Work-wise, it’s … it’s really good for me. It would mean I’m away quite a bit before the wedding. Maybe I shouldn’t take it now, not if you …’

‘You have to take it,’ Meg said. ‘You’re so good at your job. It’s an amazing opportunity.’

‘Are you sure?’

‘Of course!’

‘But don’t you need me?’

‘I need you, of course, always,’ Meg said. ‘And your knowledge of events will be invaluable, but you’ll be across all the decisions and I’ll call you about things. I guess we need to both work to pay for the wedding, so it is what it is. I’ll sort stuff out here. My job’s so flexible, I really don’t mind. And actually, I already have an idea.’

‘Okay?’ Hannah said. ‘I’ll be in Europe so I’ll be on the phone to chat to you about things, and in the right time zone. What’s your idea?’

‘The man in the florist’s, David, he offered to come to everything with me.’ Meg saw surprise on Hannah’s face, that she had managed to speak to the man for long enough for this to have happened. ‘I think he felt sorry for me, well he definitely did feel sorry for me. I mean I was crying a lot , but he seemed to genuinely mean it. We really seemed to get on.’

‘I think that’s a great idea.’ Hannah got up from her chair and starting tidying up the flat, now they had finished eating.

‘Do you?’

‘Of course,’ Hannah said, taking Meg’s plate. ‘He always looked nice when we walked past the shop. Might even give you a discount.’

‘Hannah!’

‘I’m joking,’ she said. ‘What’s he like?’

‘He must be like mid-fifties,’ Meg replied. ‘He lives with his partner Mark who works at St Helens as a counsellor.’

‘Did you ever know Mark, at school?’

‘No, they moved here around the time I went to uni, I think.’

‘Well, they sound great.’

‘Yeah, David was amazing. It was mostly me talking but he seemed to really understand my situation.’

‘I bet he will know his stuff,’ Hannah said. ‘He must work on weddings all the time.’

‘That’s true!’

‘And if you are feeling a bit … stranded, I guess, when I’m not here, then starting to meet people is good. I know you’ve said that a few times now, and you expected friends just like the ones we’ve left in London … But maybe this is good. He can introduce you to people.’

‘What if we don’t make any other new friends for ages?’ Meg asked, her worst fear about the move.

‘Oh Meg.’ Hannah came and stood behind Meg, rubbing her shoulders. ‘Of course we will. We made friends at university and we made friends when we moved to London. It’s just about putting ourselves out there. It’ll get better when I’m at home more, I promise.’

‘I miss the friends I already have,’ Meg said. ‘Sometimes I wish they hadn’t all had babies so they could come and visit every week.’

‘They will though, eventually,’ Hannah replied. ‘And in the meantime, we’ll make friends here! It’s normal to take time to find your community when you move to a new area.’

‘I’m just worried the community here is all people like my parents.’

‘It won’t be,’ Hannah said. ‘You’ve already found one person who isn’t.’

‘That’s true.’ She looked up at Hannah, the love of her life, the woman she was going to marry. ‘Do you think my parents will come to the wedding? Should I mentally prepare for, I don’t even know, like, walking myself down the aisle? I always pictured … you know, all of it.’

Hannah looked sad as she sat down at the table again. She took Meg’s hand in hers. ‘I don’t know, Meg. They should come. I mean I think it’s wrong if they don’t, but I also don’t want them to cause stress around what is meant to be the biggest day of our lives.’

‘And it’s just a small wedding,’ Meg said. ‘It’s not like I’m kissing you on a big screen in the shopping centre! I just thought they had got it, you know. Telling them we were engaged, I thought everyone was happy.’

‘Me too.’

Meg looked at her. ‘What?’ She could tell something was up.

‘No, nothing.’

‘You were going to say something.’

‘I don’t want to make you more upset, but when we did go over to tell them, I did notice your mum give your dad a weird look.’

‘Really?’

‘Yeah, I didn’t want to tell you in case I upset you, and it was for no reason.’

Meg didn’t know what to say.

‘She kind of seemed to say, like, see I told you , as if they thought, or hoped, we were never going to get married. I don’t know.’

Meg felt a bit dizzy.

‘It will be a perfect day,’ Hannah continued, reaching for her again. ‘Your parents will come round in the end, Meg. I know they’re difficult, but all the times I’ve met them, I can see they love you so much. It’s not about them anyway! It’s about us becoming a family, officially. As long as we’re both there, that’s all we need.’

‘You’re right.’

‘While they figure things out, you’ll have had a great few months planning it all with this David guy, your new friend. It’s all exciting!’

Hannah was so right and always had the magic touch in terms of being able to calm Meg down. Whether it was work or friends or just worrying about the state of the world, she was always there, like a warm blanket. Neither girlfriend nor partner ever felt like enough of a description of who she was to Meg. The newer term, fiancée, was closer but not quite right either, and she still changed which one she used at will.

‘I know,’ Meg said. ‘Got to stay positive.’

‘Do you want to go now, tell him you’re in?’

‘I’ll pop in and tell him tomorrow.’

‘Great,’ Hannah said. ‘Do you want me to come?’

‘No, I’ll do it,’ Meg said. ‘But I’ll make sure you meet him soon.’

‘Okay.’

‘What shall we do today then?’

The window that had been subtly rattling in the background suddenly slammed shut, and one of the handles slipped slightly from where it should have been.

‘Let’s fix that bloody window.’

The next day, with Hannah at home working on the next few weeks’ projects to get ahead, as the sun was beginning to dip below the tree line in the park, Meg was walking back up the high street from the supermarket, ready to make a detour.

When she arrived at the flower shop, its colourful awning was still out. She peeked inside. David was there, carefully bending down to spray some leaves of the biggest plants, and he was muttering to some of them. She watched him for a moment and before she knew it, she was inside the doors of the shop.

‘Hi.’

David turned to face her, and put the spray bottle down. ‘Meg!’

‘Are you still free on Monday?’ she asked.

David looked at her, surprised for just a second, before walking silently to the door to hug her.

‘Of course!’ he said, arms round her, beaming. ‘I’d be honoured.’

‘Only if you’re sure! I know it’s a big ask.’

‘I’d eat cake with anyone, Meg. It’s really not …’

‘Sometimes I feel like I just have to do stuff alone,’ Meg continued, feeling the emotions of the wedding stir inside her. ‘Because I always have …’

‘I understand that,’ David said, his hands on her shoulders. ‘But this time, you don’t have to be alone. I’ll come with you. Really. I’d be delighted.’

‘Thank you so much.’

‘It will be a great way to network with other small businesses too!’ David smiled at her. ‘So don’t worry, I’ll be getting something out of it.’

It seemed like David was only saying that for her benefit, but she appreciated his help all the same.

‘Meet you here, ten o’clock?’

‘Perfect.’ David smiled at her. ‘We’re going to have so much fun! Where are we going? Do you want me to drive?’

‘Oh, if you could,’ Meg said. ‘I still can’t drive!’

‘No worries. We can take the van.’ He gestured outside. ‘She’s called Daisy. I apologize to you and her in advance for my parking. Anyone else in the vicinity at the time too, actually.’

‘It’s in Bletchley. Let me just look up the name again.’ Meg scrolled through her phone trying to find it in her emails. ‘Angie’s Cakes – that’s it.’

‘I know her!’

‘Do you?’

‘She makes our cakes! You had her Viennese whirl actually,’ David said. ‘I’ll make sure you pick the right flavours too. She can be a little … adventurous.’

‘Great,’ Meg said, looking over to the cakes on the counter, one of which was an unappealing green colour. ‘I’ll see you tomorrow!’

For the first time, Meg noticed the music playing quietly in the shop. One of her dad’s favourite songs, by Robert Plant. She smiled.

‘I’ll see you tomorrow,’ David said, picking up the spray bottle again. ‘Bye, petal.’