Page 29
When we were back inside the stables, I accepted his help dismounting my mare, wholly aware of my stomach’s warm leap at his large, strong hands locked around my ribcage.
As he lowered me to the ground, a small burst of his fresh, subtly sweet breath hit my face at the very same moment that my breasts, peaked from the chill, brushed against his chest. The warmth traveled between my legs, and I inhaled, shocked by the sensation.
I wondered if he wished to memorize the feel of our bodies pressed together as badly as I did.
My pulse thrashed emphatically in my ears and I let my fingers brush against the hard wall of muscle protecting his heart.
“Believe it or not,” he drawled, touching my feet to the ground, “I’m redirecting all of my energy to not be short with you today.”
I bit my lip to block my smile from growing too large and curled my fingertips around the cloth of his linen shirt. A dark blaze of desire sputtered through his stare. It disappeared as quickly as it came.
“I didn’t know you could be so generous,” I teased.
“I’m generous with many things when I want to be, Ella.”
“Thank—thank you.” I took a step back and cleared my throat—self-preservation, to avoid combusting. His gaze followed my movements as I caressed the mare’s long, sleek neck. “I know you said that wasn’t meant to be a gift, but it was one.”
“A precursor then, to your actual gift.” He picked up his bag, withdrew a thick shawl made of animal fur, and handed it to me. “For you. ”
I ran my hand over the thick pelt, gray like the grim skies of fall, speckled with a tawny brown as warm as the fur felt beneath my fingertips.
It had been dark when I’d seen the animal, but…
“Is this—?”
“The wolf that attacked you in the barn,” he confirmed.
“I was going to burn the damn thing, but then I thought…” Gavin took a step closer.
The cold, empty caverns of my heart reached out for his warmth.
He tilted my chin up so I could meet his intent, brown-eyed gaze.
“How convenient would it be for you to wear this around your neck? My mark, of sorts.” He took another step closer and brushed over my lips with his thumb.
“And a constant reminder of what happens to anyone or anything that tries to harm you.” I exhaled shakily, and a muscle worked in his jaw in response to my quickening breaths.
“Because, Ella?” he said cooly, brushing a piece of hair from my face, “I’ll gladly skin them all. ”
My breath tightened in my chest. “That—that’s crazy,” I whispered, clenching my thighs together. No, no, no . The thought of him ripping apart my threats should not excite me.
But it did .
Gavin’s mouth widened into a grin. His warm fingers touched my jaw, and he chuckled, not denying my words. With a single movement, he brushed my hair off my neck and held my face in his hands.
As he looked into my eyes with breathtaking clarity, his grin faded, the playfulness gone.
“I do have one wish for you, on your birthday.” He worked his thick throat through a swallow and held my gaze.
The stroke of his thumbs on my cheeks sent delightful shivers up and down my spine.
“May your light blind your nightmares,” he said, “and your love burn away the life that confines you.”
I sucked in a shallow breath when he leaned down and pressed his lips to my forehead. Closed my eyes and memorized how every part of my body was on fire and alive. How my heart was elated. Safe .
“Thank you,” I whispered. Before he could pull away, I lifted up on my toes and pressed my mouth to his bearded cheek—quickly, even though I had the urge to linger.
The sudden, gentle heat of his exhale graced my skin, causing me to dig my fingers into the solid wall of his chest and look up.
My heart breathed a sigh of relief when his smile returned, gentle and soft. Another brush of his thumb on my cheek, and he answered, “Always.”
***
We returned to camp an hour later, just as he’d promised. Despite Gemma’s earlier objection, it turned out the others had had their own motives for sending me off. They’d made a run to town during that hour we were gone, and I was welcomed back with a gift from each of them.
From Finn, my own professionally drawn map of Nyrida with the Caves location and Elias’s army outposts marked in a secret code he’d created. In case it ever got lost.
From Ezra, a history book about Nyrida during the Rexus dynasty—before Simeon and Molochai.
From Caz, a set of knives purposed to skin and cut an animal. Specifically a deer, he said. Or “my own” stag.
I purposely avoided Gavin’s reaction to that one.
And from Gemma, a few pieces of artwork Oliver had made for us both during her time in Warrich. She held me for minutes while I cried into her shoulder.
The day felt surreal. This past time with my new friends felt surreal.
I was tired from long days of travel and taxing weather.
We all were, but we had otherwise avoided danger and enjoyed each other’s company.
They meant the world to me already, all of them.
It struck me, sad as it was, that I had never even dreamed of having friends like this .
Maybe, if hope would allow, I could find more friends in the Caves. With Marin Sinclair, Caz’s wife. Maybe even with Elias Winterton. I could start as his friend, and then—
“I need to go into the market for a few things.” Gavin’s deep, commanding timbre eclipsed all thoughts of my betrothed. “You stay here with the others. Don’t stray far.”
I stood from my spot by our campfire. “Can I come with you?”
“No.”
“Really?” Lifting my chin, crossing my arms in defiance, I pressed, “Are you sure?”
He studied me, knowing what I would say if he denied me my choice. He’d trapped himself with that one. It was like watching a marble statue crack in real time. Consequences be damned.
“Shit,” he hissed, running his hand over his face.
I finally let loose my triumphant grin.
“Listen, there are rules. You’ll speak nothing but pleasantries to anyone. Do not give your name. You’ll stay less than five paces from me at all times. Do you understand?”
“I thought you said you don’t want me living in fear.”
“I don’t. That doesn’t mean it’s something I am capable of, however.
Not when it comes to you.” He gripped my shoulder and let his fingers curl possessively around the back of my neck like at the horse barn.
Whatever had kept him from touching me these past few days seemed to be dissipating.
Fast . “So,” he pressed, recapturing my attention. “Do. You . Understand ?”
I bit my lip and nodded. “Yes, sir.”
“Good.” He studied me from head to toe, contemplating. “And don’t call me sir. ”
But the hungry gleam in his fervent stare made me wonder if he secretly liked it .
Our whole group decided to go into town. “No soldier left behind,” Caz joked. Now, I stood in a small, stuffy shop of trinkets with Gemma and Ezra while Caz and Finn ran their own errands and Gavin discussed something important with the shop owner in a low, hushed tone.
Gemma caught me watching him.
“You’re spending a lot of time with him,” she observed sourly.
I shrugged, still happy from the way his touch made me feel, and looked through an old book with stale, yellowed pages. “He’s teaching me a lot.”
“Uh-huh.” She focused on a small but detailed wooden figurine of an eagle, its wings spread wide. “Don’t be na?ve, Ary. Men like Smyth—when they’re finished using something, they leave it broken.” She returned the eagle to its place among a cluttered shelf of similar wooden figures.
“I know you don’t like him.”
“It’s not a matter of liking him.” She faced me, fierce eyes blazing with ire.
“The only reason I haven’t found a way to force him very, very far away from you is because I trust that Simeon has his reasons.
But Smyth? He is overstepping. He is getting too close to you.
He is violent, crude, hired muscle, and you are our queen.
” She crossed her long arms over her chest. “And most importantly, he is not Elias, who already adores you even without having met you.”
My smile fell. “If Elias adores me so much, he should have come for me himself.”
Fuming, I sought Ezra in the corner of the shop by the window, leaving Gemma to gawk at—but not deny—my words.
She had just as much a right to decide Gavin Smyth’s worth to me as Simeon had to decide that people in Tovick were more valuable than those in the ransacked, oppressed village we’d passed through yesterday.
They had no right .
Ezra glanced up from the history book he scoured and gave me a brief grin before refocusing. A clear but kind signal he didn’t want to be bothered. That was just fine. I stood next to him in silence.
Not long had passed since we’d left Warrich, and my friends’ loyalty to Simeon and the Wintertons had become clear. The anticipation and excitement they felt at the thought of uniting me with them, with Elias, was palpable. I really wanted to feel the same, but I didn’t.
I held onto the part of me eager to make companions with people like Marin. I held onto it, determined to not return to the cold, lonely girl I’d left in Warrich. I tried to let that hope be enough to give my heart some peace. Living free in the world was enough. My friends were more than enough.
But I couldn’t shake my instinct about those Caves.
I couldn’t help the wariness I felt that Elias hadn’t come for me himself.
What kind of husband would he be? Would he let me fight, or keep me resigned to the throne?
Christabel’s prophecy claimed I was the one who needed to destroy Molochai.
But in Freyburn, Gemma made it sound like Elias would be reluctant to let me participate in his annual training.
Then there was my mother, who’d left me to starve and claimed I needed to remain dainty and small. To fit Elias’s preference, perhaps?
Table of Contents
- Page 1
- Page 2
- Page 3
- Page 4
- Page 5
- Page 6
- Page 7
- Page 8
- Page 9
- Page 10
- Page 11
- Page 12
- Page 13
- Page 14
- Page 15
- Page 16
- Page 17
- Page 18
- Page 19
- Page 20
- Page 21
- Page 22
- Page 23
- Page 24
- Page 25
- Page 26
- Page 27
- Page 28
- Page 29 (Reading here)
- Page 30
- Page 31
- Page 32
- Page 33
- Page 34
- Page 35
- Page 36
- Page 37
- Page 38
- Page 39
- Page 40
- Page 41
- Page 42
- Page 43
- Page 44
- Page 45
- Page 46
- Page 47
- Page 48
- Page 49
- Page 50
- Page 51
- Page 52
- Page 53
- Page 54
- Page 55
- Page 56
- Page 57
- Page 58
- Page 59
- Page 60
- Page 61
- Page 62
- Page 63
- Page 64
- Page 65
- Page 66
- Page 67
- Page 68
- Page 69
- Page 70
- Page 71
- Page 72
- Page 73
- Page 74
- Page 75
- Page 76
- Page 77