Page 4

Shy

Rhys’s arms tighten around me as the alarm clangs and our people start to come out of their homes, worried looks on their faces and weapons in hands.

“Well, that was expected,”

Josie says. “You need to get that boy laid and properly or that wizard dude is going to murder everyone.”

I ignore her, trying to figure out what to do. This has only happened once before. Right after the royals returned. “We need to bring the wolves inside.”

Our pack tends to stay outside the mountain. While the pocket world Frelsi exists in seems to be a wide-open valley, we’re actually inside the mountain, and the magic can’t completely fool wolf senses. They’re happy outside, but they’re also vulnerable.

If Myrddin’s found us, we need to bring them in. They will be his first strike.

“We need to get Shy somewhere safe,”

Rhys tells his fathers.

If Myrddin’s found us, I’m not sure anywhere is safe. Beyond that I’m not about to hide if we’re going into a fight.

“You need to calm down and stop the magic that’s pouring off you, son.”

Devinshea Quinn wades through the grass. “Shy, it might be best if you put some space between the two of you. It has to be your decision. He can’t think straight long enough to let you go.”

“He won’t like that.”

Rhys has gotten so much more protective, and he was pretty much a nightmare before his ascension. He’s always treated me like something precious he needs to preserve. In a fight, he’ll insist I stay hidden or he can’t do what he needs to do. I want to be more like Evan and Fen, who fight like a team.

“Rhys, you’re putting Shy in danger,”

the king says calmly. “Right now, we still have some shot at not giving away a precise location. The magic around Frelsi will ping it through the countryside, but Myrddin will figure it out if you give him enough data. And that will hurt Shy and your mother. You should know he likely won’t kill them. He’ll take them and hurt them.”

The king knows how to talk to his son.

Rhys takes a deep breath and steps back, his hand still holding mine.

“That dude is wound tight,”

Josie says, looking around and shaking her head. “Poor goats are going to get tummy aches.”

I turn her way. She might be my best lead on what’s really happening. “Do you sense anything outside?”

The dead can be sensitive to certain magics. Like Josie can see Rhys’s magic. She might be able to sense Myrddin’s.

“Is someone here?”

His Highness asks, and there’s a certain tension to his stance.

Rhys lets my hand go and allows his Fae father to approach him. He shifts his hands out, giving Dev access to his chest. “It’s Josie. She was a tourist who died on the mountain and got stuck here. She’s human.”

Josie frowns. “He says that like it’s a bad thing. Prejudice, much? Oh, hey, what’s that?”

I look over and Bris is in the house. He places a hand flat against Rhys’s chest and Rhys almost immediately relaxes.

“Whoa. He’s pulling the excess magic out of him. Holy shit, Shy. Is that like a god or something?”

Josie asks.

I need her to stay on task. The lecture about the Fae pantheon is going to be a short one. “Yes, Rhys’s father is what we call an ascended god. It’s what happens when Fae bond with non-corporeal ancient beings. This is an Irish deity named Bris.”

Josie cocks her head. “Like the thing where they cut a baby’s penis off?”

“No,”

I say with a sigh as I watch Rhys. Am I hurting him by being close? If I were to leave, would he settle down and find a proper goddess? I love this man. It’s an emotion that’s sat in my chest pretty much since the moment I met him. I don’t want to hurt him. “It’s just his name.”

“Did she ask if he’s named after the Jewish ritual?”

the king asks, his lips quirking up.

“Yes, she’s not up to date on Irish gods,”

I admit. “But she is pretty good with seeing magic. Josie, do you sense anything? If Myrddin sent an eye, it’ll feel like something is pressing in on you.”

I’m pretty sensitive to certain types of magic, too. I remember how the last eye Myrddin sent made me nauseated and anxious. I don’t feel it this time.

Josie seems to think for a moment and the alarm stops, bringing blessed quiet with its cessation. She finally turns and points to the north. “I sense something from there, but it’s not like what happened a while ago. I did feel that. This is different. I would bet it’s coming through the portal.”

Which means whatever set off the alarm is in Reykjavík. Where I happen to know some people. Oh, they’re all dead, but they can tell me things.

“Is everyone okay?”

I look over and the queen is running into the yard followed by Neil Roberts and our general. I would bet they didn’t want to be running after her, but she is the queen. They likely told her to stay put, but she does what she wants.

“I’m fine, Mom.”

Rhys steps back and straightens his shirt. “I lost control for a moment.”

“And now we have an eye outside,”

His Grace declares, his eyes back to normal. “We need to get the wolves inside somehow.”

“I don’t think it’s an eye,”

I explain. “We don’t have to panic.”

One of our witches walks in and whispers something to Sasha. He stands tall and faces the royals. “The witches agree with Shy. They do not believe it’s Myrddin. The energy is wrong, they say. They are going to investigate but believe the wolves are safe for now.”

The queen moves in and looks her baby boy over. “Rhys, are you sure you’re okay? What set you off?”

Despite the fact that everyone seems to relax slightly, I feel anxious again. There’s only one answer, and I give it before Rhys can come up with some bullshit no one will buy. “It was me. It’s always me. But the witches are right about the eye. Josie says it’s something else. Something she hasn’t felt before, and it’s coming through the portal.”

The queen turns my way, and her gaze softens. “Shy, he’s in an emotional state. That is not your fault.”

I like the queen, but she doesn’t fully grasp what’s going on between me and her son. “I told him I shouldn’t come to Faery.”

The king curses under his breath and the queen winces.

“If she doesn’t want to come, we shouldn’t make her,”

His Grace says.

And the grass starts to grow again.

The queen turns to her Fae husband, her eyes narrowing. “Stop it.”

I hold up my hands. “I’m going. I was worried I would be a distraction. It was a brief thought. I’m sorry I brought it up. Of course I want to go.”

I reach for Rhys’s hand, and he seems to calm at the contact.

“Shy comes with me or I stay with her. I will not leave her,”

Rhys states quietly, bringing my hand to the same place where his father recently pulled magic from. He cradles it there. “Papa, if you have a problem…”

His Grace’s hands come up in obvious concession. “No problem.”

“Oh, we have a problem,”

Sasha argues. “Apparently we need to go to the portal and figure out what’s out there. It’s big enough to set off our alarms. Even if it isn’t Myrddin right now, that kind of magic will attract attention. I will gather some people to go into town with me and figure out what’s happening.”

“I’ll go,”

Donovan says, and his eyes narrow when Sasha starts to argue. “I have a magic dampener on. I’m not foolish, General, and I won’t put the community at risk, but I can’t have Rhys go, and he’ll feel better if I’m protecting Shy.”

What? I was prepared to fight to go. I can talk to some of the dead. I hope the living haven’t seen anything or we have a real problem. That means our witnesses will be the supes of the city or the dead. I’m the only one who can talk to both.

“Why the hell would Shy go?”

Rhys asks, his hand tightening around mine. “I’m not putting her in danger. Dad, you can handle it. If you need backup, I’ll go, but I’m not risking Shy.”

“Shy is the reason we’re not panicking and locking down the mountain,”

the king points out. “She’s the only one with any idea what is happening, and I believe she’ll be invaluable figuring out what’s going on. Shahidi, I’m making a request as your king. Will you aid Frelsi?”

I don’t hesitate. A spark of…I don’t know what to call it…pride, eagerness…hits me hard. “Of course, Your Highness. I was going to suggest I take… Well, normally I would ask for Fen and Evan or Lee if I couldn’t go with Rhys. I was going to offer to talk to some people I know. Dead people. Like I said, they can be sensitive to certain magics.”

“It’s strong,”

Josie says, and I notice her eyes close as she seems to sigh. “It feels…good. Not like I think whoever is working the magic is good. I mean, it’s nice. It’s kind of vibrating along my system. But then I felt some of that from King Hot Stuff before he started wearing the amulet thing Lily gave him.”

The King of All Vampire gives off a lot of death magic. I can sense it when I open myself to it. Which means others can as well. So Lily found a way to dampen it.

“They don’t need you,”

Rhys insists. “You can’t fight whatever’s out there. I won’t let you get hurt.”

I turn to the man I love. The man who sometimes smothers me. “Babe, I need my hand.”

His grip tightens. “You are not leaving the town. I forbid it.”

Yeah, he’s started using that word, and I don’t like it one bit.

“Rhys, she is not a possession,”

the queen says in a firm, slightly pissed-off tone. “She is an adult woman who has been through things you cannot imagine, and you will lose her if you continue to treat her like a doll you own. This is not love. This is obsession, and if that’s all it is, then I assure you, son, I will make it my life’s work to get her somewhere safe, somewhere she can be herself.”

Whoa. I did not expect that. I kind of expected everyone to tell me how I need to be gentle with Rhys and understanding. Like Harry had. Harry always told me Rhys loves me and he doesn’t mean some of the toxic shit he can fall into. So I expected the same from the queen.

I didn’t expect her to understand me.

“Zoey, I just got him calm,”

His Grace complains.

The queen’s head shakes. “I will not force another woman to put up with this possessive shit. I do believe Rhys loves her, but he’ll drive her away or break her if he refuses to see her as a whole human being who can make her own damn decisions. Who has a whole life beyond being his goddess. If she’s your goddess, son, then you should trust her to know what she can and can’t do.”

I kind of love the queen. All this time I was intimidated at the idea of Rhys’s mom. Not that I haven’t heard the stories about her, but I expected she would side with her son no matter what.

“Rhys, your mother is right,”

the king says in a calm voice. “Do you think I don’t know what you’re feeling? My instincts are to protect your mother at all costs. Even her own autonomy. I have to check myself all the time because that kind of obsession can break a soul, and you don’t want that for Shy. I will watch over her. I won’t let anything happen to her, but you need to let her use her gifts to help her family.”

“Unless she’s not family and she’s merely a possession.”

The queen is staring at her son.

“Zoey,”

His Grace says again, her name an admonition.

But Rhys slowly lets go of my hand. “She is everything to me. I do not mean to make her less than she is.”

The look he sends me threatens to bring me to my knees. He looks at me like I’m the sun in the sky and I’m going to leave him in darkness.

But what he doesn’t understand yet is that I am darkness.

“She is a warrior, Rhys,”

Sasha says quietly. “I made sure of it. She is perfectly capable of defending herself. Like your sister is. She is part of our army and she has a job to do, one you cannot help with because your magic might give away our position and put everyone in Frelsi in danger. Do you understand?”

Rhys’s eyes close and when they open, he looks grim. “Of course, General. I forgot myself.”

I feel for him. He’s trying, but Sasha is right. I do have a job to do, and if Josie feels the magic, maybe I can, too.

Suddenly the Drowning Woman is close. She stands right next to Zoey Donovan-Quinn, so close I worry for her, but I hold back the warning. I have to be stronger than this. She cannot harm the living. Is she trying to scare me? Well, I’m done being scared. If she’s working with whoever is out there, then she’ll find out how badass a warrior that big Russian made me.

I close my eyes and try to access my power the way Harry taught me. It’s a space inside me, he explained. When I breathe deep and listen to my body, I can feel it.

And I can feel what Josie is feeling.

The magic is weak here, but then it’s coming across hundreds of miles and all our wards. I can still feel its pull.

I thought it would feel like some of the magic I’ve had worked around me. Some of it soft, like the slightest caress. Some of it scratches and claws at me.

This one calls to me. This one tells me I could master it if I tried.

This magic feels familiar. Like some song that plays in the back of my head all the time. It feels like it’s mine, but I don’t have magic beyond my abilities.

I open my eyes and look to Sasha first. It’s a habit. Since I came to Frelsi, Sasha has been the authority figure in my life. Well, the one who didn’t live inside me. Sasha trained me in combat and strategic thinking. Sasha taught me to trust my instincts in the field. When I’ve been allowed in the field. Rhys tends to find a way to get me to stay out of the line of fire. “It’s death magic. I can feel it. It’s powerful, but I don’t think it’s here to hurt us. I know that sounds weird, but it’s almost like an invitation. It’s definitely not an eye. I know how that feels.”

“All right,”

Sasha says. “Then you will go into the city with the king and perhaps Neil while I talk to our witches about how this affects our plans to leave. Please talk to your friends and try to get a better feel for whatever is out there and what they might be inviting us to.”

“And me.”

The queen steps beside me.

“Zoey,”

His Grace begins.

“Don’t,”

the king says with a sigh. “Devinshea, do not push her. Settle our son down and then perhaps the two of you could have one of the witches teleport you to Nimue to see if she’s got legs yet. We need to leave soon, and the last time I saw her she was barely a head and some shoulders.”

“I would rather…”

Rhys began and then stopped as though thinking better of it. “Yes, sir.”

He looks my way, the saddest expression on his face. “Shy, I’m sorry.”

I’m sorry I put him in the position. The queen is wrong. It is my fault, but I’m starting to change my mind about the whys. While Harry was with me, I knew there could be nothing physical between me and Rhys. In the weeks since he’s been gone, grief consumed me at first, but something about the queen’s words sink in and give me strength. Sasha did teach me how to fight.

The queen might teach me how to fight for myself.

But that’s no reason to be angry at Rhys. He’s scared. I move in close. I crave this man. It is something like obsession, but it’s also love. “I’ll be fine.”

The truth is I’m scared to have sex with him. I’m scared I won’t be enough. Everything I know about sex is creepy assholes at the psychiatric hospital who tried to touch me. I swear even though Harry had no body, he would work some kind of magic. When anyone would try something on me, the walls would seem to shake and a cold would skim over my skin and the men would back away, utterly terrified. So I avoided what happens to lots of women in places like that, but I still know nothing. He’s a sex god.

He’s a virgin who somehow connected with me on a level that I don’t understand.

We’ve kissed, but only a few times because it hasn’t been long since Harry passed over. Still, it feels normal and natural to go on my toes and brush my lips to his. His hands go to my waist but he lets me control the kiss, lets it be the tender promise I mean for it to be.

“Be careful, Shy,”

he whispers when I break it off. His forehead rolls against mine. “I’ll listen to my mother. I’ll work on it. I promise.”

I step back and can’t even find the will to be mad at this gorgeous, amazing man. “Say hi to Nim for me.”

He nods and I notice I’m surrounded by pansies, beautiful colorful flowers. His gift to me.

I also notice the Drowning Woman is at a distance again.

“I wish I could go,”

Josie says. “The portal never lets me through.”

Because she’s tied to roughly the place where she died. I don’t know why it’s different with the Drowning Woman.

“Let’s go,”

the king orders.

The queen moves in close to me and threads her arm through mine. “Maybe we can do some shopping if it turns out to be harmless. I saw the prettiest sweater that would look beautiful on you, and I think you’re due for some new boots.”

I am actually not much of a fashion girl. I wore hospital gowns for years, and then Sasha and Trent had us in practical clothes in case of a life-threatening fight breaking out. So I hope she’s talking about combat boots. Or all-weather boots. I could use a pair of Birkenstocks.

“When we get back from Faery I’m going to talk Devinshea into letting us have a girls weekend in London,”

the queen announces as we start making our way toward the portal at the north end of the pocket world. “You and me and Evan. We can see if Neil wants to come and bring Cassie.”

“Do you have any idea how long it’s been since I went shopping at anything that isn’t Iceland’s version of an Army Navy store?”

Neil is suddenly on my other side. “I swear Z I missed you, but I missed Dev’s black card more than anything. And Chad’s dressing like a Nordic dad these days. I swear I saw him looking at a pair of Birkenstocks.”

I am going to be so out of place. Still, I like the queen’s affection and how the king asked me to share my gifts. With my family.

How I long for that word. How that word scares me.

We reach the portal and I take a deep breath, ready to face whatever is on the other side.