I couldn’t sleep.
I gave up on even trying around four in the morning and wandered through my home in the dark even though I knew it would keep Caden and Seth up.
Packing needed to be done and we had no idea how long we’d be gone.
I hauled out a few backpacks from a box in the garage, prepared to dedicate one to clothes, one to food and toiletries, and one to comfort items. If I was going to leave everything I knew, then I was going to keep the most important things with me.
Caden abandoned sleep to help me, turning on a load of laundry, and packing what he knew were my favorite pieces that were already clean.
While I gathered up toiletries, he made us an absolutely monstrous omelet, using up as many ingredients from the fridge as he could.
There would still be a lot of waste but that couldn’t be helped.
At least I had a compost bin in the yard to deal with most of what we couldn’t take.
The pantry and freezer would be fine, but I couldn’t leave the fridge full.
Seth watched helplessly for a while, unsure what to do, so I gave him my credit card and sent him to go fill up the car with gas.
I had already decided he was going to come with us, at least for part of the journey.
Seth might be able to get some good distance as a shifter, but a black panther was conspicuous and he could only get so far if he were stuck as a house cat.
I knew Caden wouldn’t be pleased, but I could put my foot down about a few things.
“How long do you think we’ll be gone for?” I asked.
“No idea,” Caden replied. “I hate that we’re leaving at all.”
I hadn’t really expected him to have an answer, as nice as one would have been. The safest bet would be to assume we had to leave long term, so I would pack enough for about three weeks and manage anything that wouldn’t last until the end of that time.
Clothing was the easiest to deal with. While I wasn’t certain of our destination, it would be smartest to pack for all climates. Toiletries were easy too since I tended to pack the same whether I was going for a weekend or a month.
By the time Seth returned, we were sitting down at the table, eating our middle-of-the-night feast. Shifters could pack away a lot in a short amount of time, so I let the boys eat their fill while I polished off a package of strawberries.
Caden had packed all of the travel-ready snacks from the pantry, sending Seth to load up the car with what we had available.
Exhaustion and anxiety were a steady pulse through my body, one driving me back to bed, the other demanding that everything be ready.
Preparedness was the only way I could deal with the uncertainty.
I hated not knowing what was coming, or even if it was coming specifically for us.
Whatever it was had already killed multiple shifters.
I was only a human.
I couldn’t do anything if something wanted to come after Caden or Seth, but that didn’t mean I wouldn’t go down swinging.
I paused in front of my altar to give myself a moment to breathe and to cherish it in this state.
The birch wreath I’d woven as a teen hung above the altar.
I traced my fingertips over the rim of my bowl of hazelnuts, the string of dried rowan berries, and the dried branches of bay laurel.
All plants for protection. I never quite knew if they worked, but it didn’t hurt to keep them around if we were headed into danger.
I tucked them in velvet bags and then into my totes.
A good portion of the altar was dedicated to Hecate. I’d been following her since I’d first dreamed of a woman made of starlight and heard her whisper her name to me in the dark.
“Hecate,” I whispered, “whatever this is…don’t let it take them from me.”
I pressed my palm against the smooth wood.
My dad had built the altar for me when I’d asked for one as a teen.
He’d worked as a carpenter for years and had taken the opportunity to carve tons of flourishes—leaves, flowers, even a snake coiling up one of the legs.
Mom had been super into wood-burning art at the time; I still had several items on the walls that she’d done, and she’d burned in protective runes and other symbols I’d chosen before we did the final polish.
It was far too big to take on the road and was the one item in my home I didn’t want to leave.
All of the things my parents had left me were irreplaceable.
Grief closed off my throat. It hit me at random times that they were gone, and being forced to abandon the home they’d left me was dragging it all up to the surface.
If whatever this was found us, if it wanted Seth or Caden, then this home wouldn’t be safe for them anymore.
The refuge I’d welcomed them into would be a danger.
If we couldn’t come back here, I’d have to leave my last connection to my parents to stay with Caden.
It was probably silly to worry about all of that now, but I couldn’t stop the thoughts from coming.
I had no reason but sentimentality to stay where I was.
I’d been working remotely since before Caden and I met so that I could foster kittens and be at home for them.
I’d never lived anywhere except for this house, where the walls were steeped with memories.
A sob snuck out before I could silence it and Caden appeared in the doorway, instantly gathering me into his arms. I curled into his embrace, trying to ground myself with the heat of his body and the earthy scent that sank into my senses.
“I’m here,” he whispered against my hair.
A tiny paw tapped my knee, and I adjusted so Seth could climb onto my lap in his house cat form. Seth’s purr was loud , and he shoved his little head under my chin, paws kneading my shoulders. I let out a hiccuping laugh and kissed his forehead, tucking tighter against Caden.
This was how things were supposed to be. Seth was supposed to be here with us.
Please let me come with you.
Caden’s low growl rippled through me. “Fuck no. You’re the reason we have to run in the first place.”
“Of course you can come,” I replied, cuddling him to my chest. “How else will I know you’re safe unless you’re with us?”
Caden tensed like he wanted to argue, but it wasn’t a fight he would win and we both knew it.
I can help . Seth rotated in my arms to lie like a baby. Better to have two guards than one, right?
“I guess,” Caden grumbled.
I’ll be good.
“I’m not even convinced you know how to be good,” Caden retorted.
Rude . Seth wriggled, stretching out his back leggies until every toe was separated and he looked up at me with enormous eyes. Toe stretch magic. You stopped crying .
Caden wiped away the lingering tears on my cheeks and settled more comfortably, dragging us both with him. “We don’t have much time left. If there’s anything left to pack, we should get it in the car. I don’t want to rush you, but?—”
“I know. I’ll be okay, just feeling a lot at the moment. Give me a few minutes and then we can go.”
Caden left me with Seth to pack up while he went around unplugging all of the appliances except for the freezer.
I tucked a star-shaped lepidolite into my bag alongside a handful of tiger’s eye and hematite.
Seth paw-tapped a bowl of dried hawthorn berries, flicking them like he couldn’t help himself. Bring these ones.
“Yeah?”
Can’t hurt .
Run, little star . The voice reverberated in my head, ancient and smooth as flowing water.
Run?
Seth didn’t seem like he’d heard the voice.
Urgency snaked up my spine, panic locking around my throat. What the hell?
Go. Now.
Seth stiffened. Oh, fuck. He shifted so quickly I jumped back, and he yanked on his discarded clothes. “Caden!”
A sound reminiscent of ice scraping against glass had the hairs on my arms standing up.
I swept my arm across the altar, sending items tumbling into the totes in my arms before zipping it shut and racing out the door with Seth.
He snatched my purse off the kitchen table, and with shoes in hand, the three of us dove out the front door.
I turned only long enough to lock the door before I froze in place.
At the end of the driveway, a wavering aura fractured the fragile, pale light of dawn.
Before I could blink, it moved toward us like a river over the asphalt.
Ice sank straight into my bones and my body felt like it was being ripped in half.
My feet lifted off the ground, chilling claws carving into my skin.
Memories filled my head of falling through the ice as a child on vacation, when I’d been playing where I shouldn’t have been: all-consuming cold that felt like knives was what I remembered most.
Caden slammed against me, the two of us crashing against the grass before he hooked an arm around my waist to toss me over his shoulder.
He hurled me into the back seat in a pile with Seth and leapt into the driver’s side.
The impact had me seeing stars, and I didn’t even have time to right myself before the vehicle was racing down the residential streets.
Scrabbling for purchase, I hauled myself upright and stared out the back window. What had been nearly invisible before was now a tangle of light and shadow, twisting and writhing strands rolling around a central pulsing point. I could hardly breathe as it trailed further and further behind.
Every ounce of my energy drained away and I collapsed into Seth.
Table of Contents
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- Page 13 (Reading here)
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