Page 12 of The Missing Book (Bluestocking Book Club #3)
“ W ell, I must say that I found our meeting a little… dull.”
Amelia laughed along with the other bluestockings as Lady Isobella’s remarks though she felt the very same thing.
Their conversation had been about some of the most recent books each of them had read and normally, Amelia would find that very satisfying indeed.
The difficulty, however, was that in recent times, the bluestocking book club had been used to help solve two confusing or mysterious situations which meant that now, a discussion on a particular book was a little lacking.
“There will be more for us to discuss, I am sure,” Lady Rosalyn said, as she reached to pour the tea.
“We might talk about something other than what we have been reading about, for example?” Her eyes twinkled.
“Mayhap we could turn into dreadful gossipmongers who talk only of the failures and misbehavior of others!”
With a small smile, Amelia shook her head.
“I do not think I should like that. Though I must say, I would be glad to speak of the conversation I had with Lord Broughton.” She looked down at her hands, suddenly feeling a little uncertain.
After the previous afternoon, she had found her actions and her remarks to Lord Broughton weighing heavily upon her mind.
“I do wonder if I spoke a little too sharply to him. I think I might have been somewhat rude, in fact.”
“Rude?” The surprise in Miss Trentworth’s voice made Amelia look up at once. “No, indeed not. You were firm, yes, but I do not think you were rude.”
“I confess that I do not know what you said,” Miss Sherwood put in, looking back at Amelia curiously. “You feel a little unsure about it all.”
With a sigh, Amelia spread out her hands.
“I have been upset about Lord Broughton’s remarks as regards bluestockings.
” Her eyes closed. “More than that, I took umbrage when Lady Anna told me that her brother has made it clear that she is not to keep company with me. Because of that, I fear that I may have spoken to him with that upset in mind and therefore, did so in a manner that was not at all proper.”
“I do not think that you did,” Miss Trentworth said again, rather briskly. “But then again, I am also a little outspoken so mayhap I am not the best judge.”
This made the other bluestockings laugh, though Amelia clasped her hands tightly together, not at all certain as to whether or not this meant she had been a little impolite.
“I heard what you said,” Lady Isobella said, with a slight tilt of her head. “Amelia, I will be honest and say I was a tad surprised at how blunt you were when you drew close to him but, at the very same time, it was merited.”
Hearing this, Amelia closed her eyes. “Then mayhap I owe the gentleman an apology.”
“No!”
Her head lifted, eyes opening as all of her friends spoke at once.
“No, indeed you do not!” Lady Rosalyn exclaimed. “That gentleman has said so many insulting things that it is for him to apologize, not for you to do so!”
“I quite agree,” Miss Sherwood added. “Even though I was not present, to hear that he has forbidden his sister from being in company with you is very poor form indeed! Why should he do such a thing?”
Amelia managed a wry smile, guilt still sitting upon her shoulders.
“I was impolite, yes?” Seeing Miss Sherwood’s curious glance around the room, she sighed and then closed her eyes again.
“I told him that he was much too judgmental and that was a truly terrible characteristic for a gentleman to possess.”
Miss Sherwood said nothing though when Amelia looked back at her, she only shrugged.
“Thereafter,” Amelia continued, knowing that none of her friends had heard her speak to the gentleman for the second time, “once we had entered the bookshop, I went to speak to him again.”
“You did?” Miss Trentworth’s eyes rounded. “I did not know that.”
“I could not help it!” Amelia protested. “After his complaints and his remarks about bluestockings and how he was to keep his sister from us, he appeared so astonished by this marvelous bookshop that I found myself beside him.”
It was as if every single one of her friends leaned forward, eager to hear what she had to say next.
“I do not know if I spoke to him out of a sense of guilt or because I was still frustrated,” Amelia told them, “but I went to him and stated that I found it a truly delightful place. He did seem a little overwhelmed by it, truth be told, but he was not particularly eager to make conversation. Though I should not have been surprised by that.” There came a breath of silence, each one of her friends fixing their gaze to her.
“I told him…” Amelia sighed. “I told him that I thought the Temple a marvelous place, though I also presumed he would have expected me to think that, given that I am such a dreadful thing as a bluestocking.” She winced.
“Yes, I did say it with a great deal of sarcasm in my voice, I admit.”
“What did he say to that?” Lady Isobella asked, a faint smile tracing her lips. “Was he most irritated?”
“I do not know,” Amelia answered, her face heating again. “I walked away without giving him opportunity to respond.”
Miss Sherwood giggled. “I am sorry now that I was not present. I would have very much liked to see his expression when you spoke so.”
Amelia covered her face with her hands for a moment, imagining it. “I am not at all pleased with myself for what I did. I should know better than to be so callous.”
“Oh, but you were not callous,” Miss Sherwood said, hastily. “You were firm and a little sarcastic but I do not think you said anything wrong.”
“No, indeed not,” Miss Trentworth said, with a smile. “He, who is more than a little willing to state outright what he thinks about bluestockings should have no difficulty in hearing what others might think of his character also. I think you did very well, Amelia.”
I do not think I did well. Despite the reassurance, Amelia could not shake the niggling sense of guilt.
Lord Broughton was not a gentleman she thought well of, of course, but she had not needed to speak with him in such a manner.
She could easily have avoided him, could have gone to speak with Lady Anna rather than speaking first to Lord Broughton.
Reaching for her tea cup, she took a sip and considered all that her friends had said, wondering if she was bearing a burden unnecessarily.
Mayhap she had not done anything wrong, mayhap she had spoken fairly…
but then why could she not forget the flash of surprise that had leaped into his eyes when she had leaned closer to him and spoken of his character?
Why could she not set aside the way his shoulders had rounded when she had spoken with such sarcasm?
Her heart feeling heavy and weighted, Amelia looked down at her tea cup instead of joining in the conversation again.
It was deeply frustrating that she could not forget him, could not set him aside. She had forgotten all about Lord Trafalgar so why could she not do the same with Lord Broughton?
Humming lightly to herself, Amelia meandered towards the Temple, glad again to be making her way to such an establishment. She had already purchased two books within the last sennight but there was more here for her to explore, she was sure.
Stepping inside, her maid behind her, Amelia paused for just a moment, taking everything in. The Temple was busy but not overwhelmingly so. Taking a few steps forward, she was suddenly alerted to a commotion coming from one of the staircases.
Two gentlemen came barreling towards her, one looking over his shoulder. Another fellow came rushing after them and Amelia had to jump out of the way for fear that she would be knocked over. Her heart hammering, she heard loud voices and a crash, making her skin prickle, eyes flaring wide.
“Good gracious, whatever was that?” one lady said, coming towards Amelia even though they were not acquainted. “Are you quite all right? I thought for certain one of them would knock you to the floor!”
“I am quite well, I assure you,” Amelia said, aware that she was a little breathless now.
“I do not know what happened. I must say, I – oh!” Her eyes caught on a familiar face.
“Do excuse me, I can see a friend that I must make sure is well.” Hurrying across the room on legs that wobbled a little, Amelia reached for Lady Anna’s hand, seeing her white face. “Lady Anna, are you quite all right?”
“Oh, Lady Amelia!” Lady Anna gripped her hand tightly. “How glad I am to see you.”
“What happened?” Amelia asked, very much confused about what had just taken place and why Lady Anna was so pale. “Are you well?”
Lady Anna nodded, though she swallowed, hard. “I am. My brother has gone in pursuit of two gentlemen! One of them ran into me and I fell backwards though I did not hit the ground.”
Amelia blinked in surprise. “Lord Broughton was the one chasing those two others?”
“No, not he. Melford,” Lady Anna explained, still holding onto Amelia’s hand.
“Are you injured?” Amelia asked, worried when Lady Anna closed her eyes. “Can you stand?”
Lady Anna’s smile was tremulous. “I am a tad overcome with shock, that is all. I fell against some bookshelves so that was better than falling to the floor.” Her smile wobbled all the more.
“Gwendoline was with me and my brother near enough threw her his coat as he rushed out after them. No doubt he meant for me to catch it so he could run after them all the more quickly but I had fallen back by that point. I am sure if he had seen, he would not have run.”
“Of course he would not have done,” Amelia said, soothingly, seeing the glimmer of tears in her eyes. “Did Lady Gwendoline help you?”
“There was such a rush that she was swallowed up in it, I do not think she saw either what had happened to me.” Lady Anna sniffed but her gaze, at least, was clear. “Thank goodness you found me.”