Page 7 of The Mage’s Rake (Catkin Trilogy #2)

Hugh

I t’s behind us.

Four days later, I was still thinking about the night I had spent with Alan.

Ever since that party, I continued to try to remember the events that had led to our…

coupling? Fucking? Certainly not lovemaking.

I couldn’t call it that. Regardless, I tried desperately to remember—the rising heat, the molly in the doorway, the blurred sounds of a name, and then Alan.

Alan in my arms. Alan’s lips beneath mine. Alan’s body spread beneath my own.

It was impossible to not obsess about it, especially since I had promised to stick close to his side.

Gareth had left the castle for the Wintermas holidays.

A month of fun , he had said in a deadpan voice that betrayed his thoughts on the matter.

Gareth’s family had been separated during the war, but since peace had come to Sumarene, they had gathered again and now enjoyed spending Wintermas holidays together.

Well, most holidays, to Gareth’s chagrin.

Gareth knows he’s lucky , I thought moodily. It’s partly why he hates talking about it. He’s got a few siblings, cousins, a grandmother, a few aunts and uncles left. More than any of us.

I didn’t begrudge him, though. I was glad that Gareth could find some joy during the cold winter months.

I would make my own fun. Or I would have…

if I didn’t have Alan and Landis to worry about.

If I was honest about the situation, though, I had to admit that life was far from hard.

Thanks to Corrin, the major burden of watching over our young king was allotted to the guard.

The entire Munni guard assiduously protected Landis alongside their Sunna compatriots.

And Alan, far from pursuing the life of a social butterfly, also stuck close to the castle.

A blessing in disguise, but some days, when I wanted to stretch my legs or enjoy a night out, it felt more like a curse.

I didn’t like the silences. Even seeing how happy Landis and Corrin were together made me feel sadder than I would have liked.

In the end, I dove into finishing any piece of paperwork that Gareth had left.

A wonder, I know. And when that was done, my last option was to wander up and down the halls, prowling, in hopes of finding any kind of trouble.

No such luck, however. As usual, I found my feet drawing me to a lower level, where Alan’s laboratory lay.

In order to cut across to the far eastern tower, I opened one of the great hall side doors to slip into an empty portico.

The graceful columns disappeared into shadows.

I moved out of them into the pale moonlight, looking up at the starry winter sky overhead, lightly shrouded in the thin rags of clouds. A full moon hung low in the sky.

I paused and listened. For a second, I was surrounded by silence.

I hate silence, but then my ears began to pick up the sounds of a Sumarene winter night—the faint creaking of the oak tree and the rustle of evergreen shrubbery in the garden, the occasional flap of flags, a door slamming shut in the distance, and the faint creaking of a shutter that had worked itself loose.

Huddling in my great coat, I closed my eyes and let the moonlight seep into me.

Unlike most of my Sunna kin, I didn’t mind moonlight and shadows.

I inhaled the icy cold night breeze, now tinged with smoke and the faint scent of a roast.

I’ll check in on our resident mage , I thought, as I cut across the garden and entered through a door opening into the portico on the other side. Then perhaps call it a night. He sent out a bunch of messages the other day with inquiries based on what he discovered about the potion, perhaps—

My thoughts were instantly jarred by a knifing pain in my chest. It was as though someone had sunk an ice-cold dagger in my heart. Clawing at my thick coat and clothes underneath, I staggered. I struggled to breathe. My feet came to a stop as I swayed back and forth.

Another stabbing pain, this time tearing into me with such vicious pain, I couldn’t help but give a choked cry.

I fell to my knees and then slammed into the gray flagstones beneath me.

In the distance, I could see a shadow dart out, a soldier leaving his post to join me.

Getting help, I hoped. I felt like I was dying, and I didn’t want to die.

Gods. For so long, I had felt the weight of my lonely existence.

I had come to peace with it, to some extent.

Now, it would seem, against all odds, that I would die alone in a hallway.

Margriet… I thought disjointedly, as a third stab brought black spots to my vision.

I struggled to maintain consciousness. All I could see was my hand lying before me on the gray stone.

Fingers twitching with pain. Margriet… Perhaps I shall see you sooner than I expected.

Slain by… Slain by whom? I would never know, but perhaps Alan would find out.

Alan. At the thought of my reluctant companion, I felt another stab, this time metaphorical.

A stab of regret. I had never gotten to know him beyond that one night.

That one memory that haunted me. Now I would never know.

Even now, as darkness encroached, threatening to claim me, I clung to the last thing I wanted to see.

The slight curve of Alan’s smile. His violet eyes glimmering up at me behind spectacles.

The silvery waterfall of his hair, like moonlight caught in the flesh. Alan.

Alan.

“I’m right here, Hugh.”

A familiar voice drew me up out of the darkness.

My eyelashes slowly fluttered as I blearily looked around.

If this was the afterlife, it was far from what I was expecting.

It seemed to be warm with only a touch of chill air.

A crackling fire. The dry scent of herbs and dusty tomes.

As my blurred visions sharpened, I was greeted with a shadowed figure and a flash of light-reflecting glass bending over me.

Beyond, a cheerful fire on a hearth. A room filled with shelves crammed full of—Oh. Alan’s laboratory.

“Well, he looks to be coming round, Alan.”

Aileen. Medic Aileen was also here. I groaned softly as I came to more fully. I was now firmly in my body and feeling every bit of it with painful detail. My head mainly. I could have done without that. It pounded as though I had been beaten by a thousand hammers.

“Drink this,” Aileen said softly.

I sipped at a bitter concoction.

“My Elixir of Painless Repose,” Alan said as I grimaced. “Not the best tasting, but it should put you to rights. Well, at least the headache part.”

“What happened?” I grunted.

“We were hoping you’d tell us.” Aileen patted my shoulder. “Let’s get you up and take a look. No sign of contusions. Or bruising.”

“Not a regular attack.”

“It was a stabbing pain,” I finally managed to say. “Like I had been knifed in the heart, but I was alone.”

My hand rose to rub my chest. “It still feels cold there, deep down.”

“Allow me.”

At Alan’s words, Aileen stepped back and busied herself with her bag.

She disappeared beyond the door. The room fell into a calm silence as Alan began to gently tug on my jacket.

He pushed the dark wool back and began to work on my shirt ties.

I wanted to joke. I wanted to say something about round two, but I had a feeling that it would only annoy him.

Instead, I allowed him to pull my white cotton shirt apart.

My eyes fluttered closed as I focused on the soft touch of his fingers as they ghosted over my skin.

When I looked back up at him, I focused on his face which now leaned closer than usual.

I could see the fine-spun white threads of his hair, the glint of violet behind his thick spectacles.

Violet eyes that seemed to glimmer with mysterious energy.

They were glowing. My gaze dropped to his lips which were gently pursed and now slightly opened.

His tongue swept across his bottom lip, and then he began to murmur a drone in an ancient tongue.

“Ennor naa sílme en kirimma…”

As he spoke, a warm white glow emerged from between his fingers.

It floated between us. I watched entranced as Alan’s power swirled around us.

To those watching, Alan’s power might have been magical.

I found the young tom even more entrancing.

My hand rose to his shoulder. Alan kept his gaze focused on his fingers as the white glow hung between us. His chanting ended and the light faded.

Alan eased back, and then, as if aware of my hand on him for the first time, he hesitated. My gaze met his evenly. His violet gaze flickered away from me and then back as his lips thinned.

“What is it?” I finally asked.

“There is a disturbance.” The way his voice sounded, my heartbeat began to race. “The aether that flows within you… There is a blockage. A—disturbance.”

His right hand now lay upon my heart, his fingers spreading across my chest. At the same time, his left rose to cover my hand. Alan sighed.

“Hugh—“

“Alan.”

I couldn’t help it. Alan huffed and rolled his eyes.

“Hugh… you’re… I think you’ve been cursed.”

A heavy thunk resounded through the room. Aileen was standing in the doorway, frozen in shock, her bag at her feet. The elderly molly’s blue eyes filled with tears.

“Say it ain’t so, Alan!” She whispered hoarsely, her country accent thickening in distress.

Alan’s head lowered, and the white glow faded.

The hand on my chest curled into a fist. Tension thrummed through his wiry body.

I fell silent as Alan’s declaration finally hit me.

I’d been cursed. I was dying. Or nearly.

Alan shook his head and focused on me. I was surprised to see how upset he was.

I raised my left hand to cover his fist. His left hand covered mine.

We were connected now, holding each other together. Holding each other together.

I leaned forward to rest my forehead against his. It felt good to have him so close. If the chance of dying meant that I would have another opportunity to be with Alan, I’d risk it. I had no intention of dying either.

No. I wasn’t going to think of that. I was going to enjoy the feel of Alan’s hand beneath mine. The soft brush of his silvery-white hair against mine. The scent of strawberries. His lips were so close… So close, and yet so far. And Aileen was in the room. She moved forward and then paused.

“Alan.”

“I know,” Alan said after a moment. “Let me think... It’s not taken right away. Biding its time. We have time.”

Alan pulled away then. Was I imagining that he did so reluctantly? I could be imagining things. After all, I was a cursed tom. My body ached. Would my other senses soon follow?

I had no idea what Alan was doing, but after infusing some kind of purple pendant with another ball of white magic, he began to pound some herbs together into a thick mush. Aileen helped.

“Tala, bless my hand,” murmured Alan with another string of incantations. In between, he commanded me, “Don’t move a muscle, Hugh.”

I forced myself to sit still and watch the two mutter together over their work. Aileen’s bag still lay on the ground. Forgotten. If I got up to retrieve it for Aileen—Alan would kill me before the curse could.

“It’s a full moon,” Alan said.

“Aye. I thought that as well.”

“If it was bonded this night, beneath a full moon, it may end by the next.”

“A month then.” Aileen sighed with relief. Wait. With relief? “We have a month.”

“A month?” I gasped.

“Be glad it wasn’t an instant one,” Aileen shot back. “Then we’d be kicking your ass into a grave, and what would His Majesty say?”

“I wouldn’t know,” I grunted, allowing her to push me back onto the bed. “I’d be dead.”

Aileen tore off the rest of my shirt, baring me to my waist. I was once again struck with an urge to make a joke, but the hard look on Alan’s face as he drew near told me I best hold my tongue.

I allowed Aileen to push me onto my back.

Alan dipped his fingers into the bowl and proceeded to sign a rune on my chest with a circle around it. With the paste.

I looked down my nose at my tan chest. There was a smattering of dark hair across the hard planes of my muscled chest. Aileen smirked.

Alan looked like he would rather be anywhere than touching my chest. Any concern for my well-being seemed to have disappeared entirely.

I flopped my head back on the small pillow and sighed.

“I was going to make a joke about aphrodisiacs,” I began.

“Don’t,” Alan said sharply.

Holding the pendant in his left hand and raising another ball of white light, Alan once again began to chant.

This time, the light began to stream out in thin threads that reached down to play across my flat belly and then upwards to my heart.

Warm filled my body. I hummed as the coldness in my chest finally eased.

After another minute, Alan whisked the pendant away, leaving Aileen the job of wiping the paste off my chest. I rather wanted Alan to attend me, but I didn’t push it. It had been a tough day for us all.

“You might feel better for now,” Alan said, “but you’ll need to rest tonight. Tomorrow, we’ll talk about what happened, and what we can do about it. Come by in the morning.”

“What if I start feeling worse?” I asked, slowly rolling my shoulders and then rising to my feet. “Wouldn’t it be better if I stayed with y—“

“Tomorrow. Morning. Hugh.”