Page 24 of The Mage’s Rake (Catkin Trilogy #2)

Alan

“ T here you are!”

Hugh’s voice broke into my thoughts as I moodily stared out at the snow-covered garden a few hours later.

At long last, the castle had fallen relatively quiet.

The kits had been safely returned to their homes, escorted by a strong guard, Ian, and a bunch of motherly mollies.

Among them was young Tomlyn, the young hero of the hour.

All is well that ends well. That is what the sages back at the White Tower would say.

Yet, as far as I was concerned, all very nearly did not end well.

Without Ian’s warning, Hugh’s quick thinking, and the teamwork of Landis’s protectors, the assassination attempt might have been successful.

And what had I done? I had played my part.

Yet, I couldn’t help but wonder what else I could have done.

The more I thought on it, the more clarity I gained.

Clarity that crystallized into one thought as a familiar voice broke into my thoughts.

Hugh. Landis needs Hugh. Gareth needs Hugh. The kingdom needs Hugh. I need Hugh.

Life without Hugh was impossible. There was no way I was about to let him fade into the night, succumb to the curse. Even as Hugh drew close to me, as I flew into his arms, as I buried my head against his chest, I vowed to myself that I would fight for Hugh as fiercely as he fought for Landis.

…bide the hour. For when it comes, he who was unfettered shall find freedom in the bonds of love.

I mused over the Goddess Nyria’s words. What had she meant exactly?

Did she know for certain that Hugh would unlock the curse?

How did she know? Can I trust her, truly, with my heart?

Part of me could not. I simply had to ascertain for myself.

The answer lay within Deep Magicks. I would call upon the power of Gaia herself to break the shackles of the curse.

Everything was ready—a lock of Hugh’s hair, a clipping from one of his nails, a sample of his blood, and the memory of his touch.

Already, I was mentally drawing and redrawing the sigil I would require.

A forbidden magick, a forgotten magick for many, but nothing would stand between Alan Carwick and his goal.

“Alan?”

I suddenly returned to the here and now with a thud, realizing that I had somehow become entwined with my beloved.

My hands and my feet were numb with the winter chill that now brushed across my face.

The wind had picked up while I had sunk into deep thought.

At the sight of Hugh’s burnished red-brown hair glimmering with a crest of snowflakes so close to mine, my heart leaped into my throat.

“H-hugh,” I said, suddenly feeling like an awkward kit speaking to his first girl. I eased back to look him over carefully. “You alright after all that?”

“That should be my question!” he shot back. His eyebrow rose quizzically. “Are you alright?”

I nodded my head and forced a smile.

“Yes, of course.” Allowing him to take my hand in his warm one, I stepped back under the relative shelter of the peristyle. “Gods, it got cold all of a sudden.”

“Lost in your thoughts?” Hugh glanced at me in amusement as he rubbed life back into each of my hands.

Looking at my pale fingers entwined with his, I found myself smiling. Yet again. Hugh always had that effect on me. My gaze met his, this time less guardedly, and my smile was undoubtedly more genuine.

“As usual,” I admitted. “Bad habit.”

“You don’t say,” Hugh snorted. “It’s been a night… and yet, somehow, I feel… I don’t know, energized, more so than usual.”

“You do?”

My hand rose instinctively to rest against the rough leather and course wool of the knight’s gear.

The palm of my hand met the hard steel of his loose chain mail beneath.

Under that, I could sense the warmth of his life energies—a brilliant, warm orange.

It was comforting. That there was an echo of the malevolent purple mixed deep in its depths worried me as usual.

It was gathering at the center of his being in preparation for the final moment.

“Don’t worry so, Alan.”

Hugh’s arms wound about me comfortingly, drawing me close to him. His nose brushed against my temple, and his warm breath tickled the fur of my lowered ears. I couldn’t help but surrender to his comforting touch.

“Whatever happens, I know that I can face it as a catkin, as a tomcat who has done his best… and…” Hugh mused slowly aloud. “After tonight, I don’t know—I feel as though I could take on anything.”

Hugh leaned back against the wall, keeping me close. We stood there, contemplating his words and watching gentle snowflakes falling yet again from a gloomy night sky.

“You did very well tonight. Corrin and you… both showed such valor when you fought, such fearlessness,” I said.

“I imagine that any fools opposing Landis may think twice before attempting again. At the very least, we may look forward to a respite for the rest of the season. Landis may have his Wintermas after all.”

“Indeed. I surprised even myself,” Hugh admitted.

He hesitated and added, “I know that I appear a confident knight, a cocky tomcat, but I always wondered whether I would ever measure up to my heritage… Whether my family would look upon me with pride. Landis and I in the early days, well, we had a tough time of it until Gareth came along. I always figured that I was just a stop-gap, but perhaps tonight I was able to prove something to myself.”

“I’m glad,” I whispered softly.

Hugh’s words echoed in my mind.

…perhaps tonight I was able to prove something to myself.

I too felt the same. Or I would once I successfully broke the curse and returned to Hugh. Perhaps he would welcome a longer-term partner. Perhaps I could become something more than short-term comfort. That was my hope, my dream if I allowed myself to admit to it.

“And you were with me,” Hugh added. His voice took on a more mischievous note. “I don’t know, but I felt even more heroic with you at my side, Alan. Your magicks were… so beautiful but powerful. Just like you.”

“Thank you,” I muttered.

I could feel a blush of embarrassment rise on my cheeks. I buried my face in his chest. My arms wrapped around his waist.

“Perhaps this calls for a-a victory celebration,” I added in a mumble.

“Eh?” Hugh cocked his head and then winked at me, reassuring me that he’d heard me loud and clear.

“Idiot,” I muttered, pushing away from him.

“Your rooms?”

For a split second, I hesitated, but then I nodded.

“Sure.”

“Your place feels more homey than mine,” Hugh said as we strolled down the empty hall.

“I don’t know if it’s the bookshelves, the plants, or the second laboratory you stuffed in the corner somehow.

My room in comparison feels… more like a room in the barracks.

Maybe I need to put a bit of you in there somewhere. ”

“Well,” I chuckled, “I’m sure I could find some use for a third workstation—“

“Gods. Three? You really need three?”

Joking and laughing, we made our way to my chambers.

I was snorting with laughter as we slipped into my rooms, but even though my teasing took on more flirtatious tones, Hugh seemed to want to take his time.

He pulled me onto his lap as he took a seat in my largest armchair—but only after he had stoked the fire and rang for some tea and freshly toasted crumpets.

Half an hour later, kissing his warm, butter-flavored lips, I couldn’t help but moan with contentment.

Spending the cold Wintermas nights with the warmth that was Hugh was more than I had ever hoped for.

Perhaps the rest of the castle was celebrating Wintermas with cheer and chatter and drinking.

I, for my part, was happy to simply spend this quiet moment with Hugh.

Buttons popped every which way as Hugh dragged my robes and cotton shirt back, baring my shoulders.

Even as his tongue and teeth drew moans out of me, my touches brought Hugh alive.

His heartbeat pattered beneath my palm, and I could feel his hard length now pressed against the light cotton between us.

My fingers remapped the velvet of his skin, the hard muscles that flexed beneath.

As his lips and tongue traced fresh paths along my jaw and down to my now-bared neck and chest, I half-purred, half-moaned.

The fire of his touch inflamed me, and I clung to him, pulling on his shoulders demandingly.

I was now straddling his lap, grinding myself against him, but he held me back easily, clearly wanting to take his time.

Instead, his lips returned to mine, and his tongue sought out my own.

It was a lighthearted duel that intensified as passion drove us to the edge.

It was overwhelming. Emotions rose like a great ocean wave, combined with everything that I had experienced that evening—joy, accomplishment, terror, fear, and pride.

There was so much I wished to do, so much I had hoped to accomplish.

Nyria and Gaia granting, tonight, I would achieve it all. That or…

Pushing the dark thought away, I focused on the present, on Hugh.

With a grunt, Hugh lifted me up and heaved himself to his feet.

Our lips parted, and I groaned, glaring at him lustfully.

He chuckled and dragged me to my room, where we proceeded to play a game of “distract the tomcat while unclothing each other”.

It ended with laughter and breathless kisses.

After pressing me against the pillows and searching out my preferred oils, Hugh paused for a moment.

His brown eyes traced lovingly over me. Before, I had always seen myself as scrawny, ungainly, and awkward, but somehow, when Hugh looked at me, I felt handsome, precious even. I blushed and fidgeted.

“Are you going to kiss me or not?” I challenged him.

Hugh’s reddish-brown tail flicked lazily, and his golden-flecked eyes flared a little. His fingers rose to gently lift my spectacles off the tip of my nose and set them aside. Leaning down, he placed a gentle kiss on my lips, as soft as a butterfly’s touch.

“I was just thinking,” he said.

“Bad habit, I heard,” I joked.

Hugh hummed, tilted his head, and contemplated me. This close, I could see the gold flecks in his eyes. Gold and sunlight and hay and horses. His scents surrounded me with a summer’s day warmth that I couldn’t help but bask in. I wondered what he could see in my eyes, experience in my scent.

“I just feel… so happy,” he finally said, his voice deepening with emotion. “So happy… and I want you to be as happy as I am.”

“I am,” I replied softly.

My hands rose to link about his neck. The soft strands of his hair brushed against my fingers.

I found myself tangling my hands in his wavy hair and gently massaging the back of his neck in silent encouragement.

When he leaned down to offer me another kiss, my tongue enthusiastically dove past his lips, drawn by the invitation of his touch.

When we drew apart to find our breath again, the corners of my eyes pricked with unshed tears. Tears of joy.

“Make me even happier,” I whispered. “I challenge you.”