Page 21 of The Facilitator, Part 3

Chapter Twelve

We knew we had to take a break before we had the last eggs implanted and a vacation to her favorite place seemed the best thing to fill that time.

Not that we’d had a conversation about whether we were going for the third round, or not, of course.

I was hesitant. I didn’t want her to go through another miscarriage, but I was equally desperate for that one last try.

With the roof down we started the journey to Cornwall.

Although she smiled and chatted, laughed even, I knew Lauren was hurting.

I also knew she was questioning herself as much as I was.

Neither of us could just accept it for what it was.

In a way, we refused to. I didn’t know whether that was to our detriment or not.

We found the cottage we’d rented and it was exactly what we both needed.

Not far from her mom so we could visit regularly and catch up on news of her recent cruise.

The best thing, it was on the beach and it reminded me of my home in the States.

We walked out through the yard and down to the beach, the sun was lowering and I rushed back to grab the bottle of white wine that had been left in the fridge for us.

I opened it, took two glasses, and we sat on beach watching the sun set and had our first glass of wine in months.

“This is exactly what I need,” Lauren said, smiling at me.

“Yep. Me, too.” I took hold of her hand. “I’m sorry I didn’t consider what you were going through,” I said quietly.

“Mackenzie, please don’t do that. We have never been in this situation before, we had no idea how to react to what happened to us as individuals and to us as a couple.

No apologies. We’re getting through it. It’s tough and I question everything I did or didn’t do, but really, we have to accept that baby wasn’t for us. ”

“I know,” I whispered and sighed at the same time. “I went overboard on the whole thing. It was something that had been denied me all these years, and then when I knew I could have a child, I guess, it not only blew my mind, but I became irrational as well,” I said.

I turned to look at the red hues bouncing off the sea. The silhouette of a boat could be seen on the horizon.

“Child or no child, Mackenzie, we will be okay. We were before, and we’ll be after, whatever the outcome,” she said.

I knew she was correct, of course. Our relationship was too strong to be crumbled easily, but I felt incomplete and I knew she did as well.

When we lost the light we headed back inside.

“Remember number two on my list?” Lauren said, raising her eyebrows at me.

“I certainly do. I have plans,” I said, pulling her in to a hug.

She chuckled. “I look forward to it. And I want to know what your number one is.”

I laughed off the question.

That evening we ate in the yard, just a simple steak salad. I’d let Lauren chop the salad, the most she usually did, while I marinated and cooked the meat on the grill.

“Have you added to your list?” I asked her as we ate.

She smirked and winked at me. “I might have. I’m still as horny,” she said.

“I like horny you,” I added.

“I’m not sure I do. It’s rather frustrating.”

I rose from the table. “I might be able to assist with that.”

I walked into the kitchen and picked up a small parcel I’d collected the previous day. I presented it to her and she opened.

“Oh, and it’s remote controlled,” she said, laughing. She unpacked the vibrating egg and gave the remote and instructions to me.

“I can connect this to my phone,” I said. “I will have total control,” I said, lowering my voice.

“I very much like the sound of that,” she added.

I took the egg away and placed it back in the box, she pouted her lips and I laughed. “Tomorrow, when we’re sightseeing,” I said.

Lauren had been asleep an hour when I woke her. The moon was high and we’d left the windows open for a cool breeze to blow in from the sea.

“What’s up?” she asked as I shook her arm.

“Nothing, get up,” I said. I had jeans and T-shirt on.

When she stood, I wrapped a blanket around her. “That will do,” I said, kicking some flip-flops over to her.

“What are we doing?” she asked.

“Number two on your list.” I took her hand and led her from the cottage. She sat in the passenger seat with just the blanket wrapped around her and giggling. I loved that sound, I hadn’t heard it for a little while.

Just a few meters up from the cottage was a parking lot for the beach. It was empty, thankfully. I pulled to the edge and opened the roof. The chill caused her to shiver, more so when she opened the blanket, letting it fall around her shoulders.

I freed my cock from the confines of my jeans and wrapped my hand around it. She watched as I pleasured myself. I set my seat back as far as it would go and patted the edge. She climbed over and straddled me.

“It’s a shame you can’t see the sea,” I said.

“Seeing you is better,” she replied, kissing me before lowering herself.

Lauren rode me hard; she rested back on the steering wheel and slid her hips back and forth, up and down. I held her waist, watching my cock slide in and out of her. Her naked moonlit body was the most relaxing sight I could have had. She settled my mind and soul.

I leaned forward and kissed her chest, taking a nipple into my mouth. I sucked and licked, held it between my teeth, and flicked with my tongue. I paid as much attention to the other. When she came, she held herself rigid. She panted and then she straightened herself and smiled at me.

“I can tick that one off the list, at least,” she said.

I opened the car door and swung my legs out, Lauren squealed as I cupped her ass and stood. I laughed as I carried her, naked and with my cock hanging out to the passenger side. I’d just got her over the door and in her seat, when headlights swept across the car park.

“Shit,” she said, laughing and wrapping herself in the blanket. I tucked my cock away and then turned to face the policeman who had pulled up alongside us .

“Anything wrong, sir?” he asked.

“No, just wanted to appreciate the beach when no one was here,” I said.

“Ma’am, is everything okay with you?” he asked.

“Of course. As my husband said, we just wanted to sit here and appreciate the beach.”

He swept his flashlight over the car. “Nice motor,” he said.

“I took delivery just a few months ago,” I said.

He nodded and held the light steady on the registration plate. I watched as he keyed it in to the computer on his dashboard. Within seconds he had the answer that he wanted.

“Just a general check, do you have ID?”

I pulled my American driver’s license from the sun visor and handed it to him. He turned his light on it and nodded again.

“Well, have a nice evening, Mr. Miller,” he said, and slowly drove to the other side of the parking lot where he waited.

“Oh my God, my heart is racing,” Lauren said.

“Remember when you had nearly getting caught on your first list?” I said, whispering.

She giggled some more. “Jesus, I did! Scrub it off, “ she said.

I started the engine and the policeman followed us to our cottage, he slowed as we pulled in and then continued up the lane. There was one thing I appreciated about the British police and that was their instance in asking if the female in my vehicle was okay.

Lauren was still laughing as we rushed into the cottage and back to bed.

The following day we visited her mom and Lauren told her about the IVF and the miscarriage. Elaine said she understood why we hadn’t told anyone and she held her daughter while they both cried. I’d explained, so soon after Seb, we didn’t want to add more sad news.

“I understand that, Mackenzie. I would have liked to have known, however awful it was. I could have helped in some way,” she said, and, suitably chastised, Lauren and I apologized to her.

We all headed out for lunch and Elaine told us about her cruise. She hadn’t the chance for a holiday in years and it seemed she and her friend had signed up for another, longer cruise leaving in a couple of weeks.

“I know this sounds awful, but I’m getting on and I’d like to do some of the things I’ve always wanted,” she said, as we waited for the menus.

We chatted about the two houses that we’d put an offer in for and the cottage we were staying in.

“I want you to do me one favor, both of you,” Elaine said, holding our hands. “You don’t stay here, in the UK, for me. I don’t intend to hang around for years and to be honest, it would be cheaper for me to live on that blooming cruise with all the food and drink I want,” she said, laughing.

Elaine had been to the States with us for a short break and she’d loved our beach house.

She often asked why on earth we were in London when we could live there, and I guess our chat about wanting to live by the coast had prompted her statement.

Maybe she thought we wanted to head back there.

It would always be my home, but a vacation home.

I wasn’t sure I wanted to live there on a permanent basis.

We took Elaine to a garden center and spent the afternoon doing odd jobs for her.

I loved the easy way she and Lauren fell into conversation and the fact they had the same laugh.

I hung clean curtains for the very first time and both laughed at me as I cursed the fucking things for not just sliding on the pole easily.

Who changed their curtains with the seasons anyway?

Elaine was at her club the following day but the one after, we’d arranged to take her to dinner.

We sat in the garden and dozed on and off, swam in the sea, and walked along the beach when the majority of tourists had left. We talked, a lot.

We told each other how we felt and finally, we had the discussion about the remaining eggs.

“We have to do it, Mackenzie. They can’t be wasted,” Lauren said. We sat on the beach in the evening with a glass of wine each after dinner and a swim .

“I’m scared, Lauren. I don’t want you to go through what you have and then…All that illness, mood swings, and sickness for nothing,” I said, being honest with her.

She rested her head on my shoulder. “We have to use those two last eggs,” she whispered and I nodded.

Of course, she was right, we had to. I had to get hold of my fears and fuck them off out of it , as Alex had said. Since we’d spoken to Gabriella, we included Alex in the situation and it felt good to share our troubles.

“Okay. We’ll call the clinic tomorrow and see what they advise,” I said. I felt her smile against my skin.

I turned to kiss her head.

“I’m glad we didn’t get those houses,” she said. “The last thing we need is having to deal with that on top of everything else.”

“I did wonder if it was an omen. I don’t often lose out on a deal but if I do, it’s usually for good reason.”

“I also don’t think we’ve talked as much as we have the past few days,” she added. I couldn’t disagree with that.

We took Elaine out for dinner the following evening and spent the next morning doing those last chores for her. I dug up her flowerbeds, probably killing a few while I did. I wasn’t shy of physical work but having Elaine directing was proving to be a little difficult.

“Elaine, you tell me to dig here, then not here but there. Then, not there but back here. Which is it?” I asked, leaning on the fork.

She laughed and Lauren popped her head out the kitchen window. “Anywhere there is not a plant or anything green,” she said.

“Thank you, I have clearer instructions now.”

I ushered Elaine away and got on with the job. I whipped my T-shirt off and got a couple of catcalls and Diet Coke jokes from her very elderly neighbors.

A couple of hours later, I’d showered and we said our goodbyes, with promises to keep Elaine updated on our next appointment.

Two weeks later we returned to the clinic for the final eggs.